Electric Feel
by foolishgames
Summary: AU. Naomi's life has become pretty typical, steady day job, steady friends, steady life. But what happens when after one night of unbridled passion she suddenly finds herself chasing after something she never thought she'd want?
1. Electricity

**So here it is, my long awaited (and by long awaited, I mean by me :)) first attempt at a Naomily fic.**

**It's... well it's quite a bit different... The idea has been nagging at me for days, and I really hope I can do what I have in my head justice. This would probably be pretty alright as a one shot, but I have so many ideas for it I'm practically aching to get them down. I'm pretty rusty with my writing, but hopefully it isn't too, too bad. **

**I'm Canadian, so I apologize if I use any non-British slang, and I don't have a beta so all mistakes are my own.**

**Feel free to reviews with any comments, concerns, criticisms, or compliments... anything that starts with a C will do really.**

**Now, onwards.**

* * *

Sweat and alcohol. I know I shouldn't be surprised when the pungent odor floods my nostrils as I push my way into the crowded club, but I cringe anyway in spite of myself. I glance around the dimly lit room filled mostly with unattractive bastards slobbering into their overpriced jack and cokes, and groan loudly. A fucking strip club. I'm hardly shocked though, I figured when Cook wouldn't tell me where we were going we'd end up in a fucking place like this. I don't know why he assumes that just because I'm gay I'm going to enjoy oogling sweaty, scantily clad women carrying god knows how many venereal diseases crawling all over me for a few quid. I shuddered slightly at the thought and continued following Cook and the rest of the boys to a large table at the corner of the room. I threw myself heavily into one of the chairs near the corner and shot annoyed glare to Cook as he plopped down next to me.

"Alright, Naomikins?" He asked laughing slightly through his shit-eating grin.

"Seriously Cook, a fucking strip club?"

"Come on Naomikins, it's my special day. You're supposed to be happy and supportive and shit."

"Could you be any more cliché? A fucking strip club for your bachelor party? How original," I responded with a cheeky smile.

"You know you love it," he answered, smiling manically. "Now let's see if we can't get us some fucking drinks over here! And, maybe a few other special presents," he added, wagging his eyebrows suggestively.

"Fuck you Cook, I don't do strippers."

"We'll see about that babe, wait to you've got a few more shots in ya before you go making any rash calls, yeah?"

I glared at him and shoved him slightly, but I was far from annoyed with his antics. He was my best mate after all, always had been. I could hardly believe he was actually getting married in a few days; it was no secret that we were both quite wild in our younger days. Between the two of us, we'd probably fucked and fucked over enough women to populate a small village, and we'd definitely downed enough vodka to float a fucking steamer. But all that had changed in the last few years. I guess when you start to hit your late twenties you just don't feel like fucking around anymore. We'd calmed down, settled into steady jobs, and now Cook was getting fucking married. Found himself a hell of a bird too, a gorgeous brunette named Michelle. Good thing he'd calmed himself down by the time he met her. She probably would have ripped his balls off if he'd of fucked around on her.

When our drinks arrived I engaged in some absent conversation with one of Cook's cousins about some boring film that I could care less about. Before I knew it I was feeling quite tipsy. I glanced over at Cook who by now had downed more shots than I've seen him do in the last year put together. I giggled slightly as he began drunkenly banging on the table demanding a lap dance from 'the fittest fucking bird in the fucking club.' His eyes glazed over slightly when an extremely alluring brunette sauntered towards him and dropped herself into his lap. I looked away, feeling strangely guilty about perving on the girl while she gave a lap dance to my best mate. I tried to focus on my drink in front of me, but I suddenly felt someone's eyes on me. I looked around the table, but all of the blokes were staring intently at the gorgeous brunette that was continuing to dance for Cook.

I tried to shake the feeling off and excused myself to go to the toilet. Not that anyone was paying attention anyway, fuckers. My legs wobbled as I stood, the full effects of the alcohol I had just consumed finally setting in. I took a few tentative steps forward and steadied myself against one of the tables. The music pounded in my ears as I continued my journey, and once I again I was overcome with the feeling that someone was watching me. I scowled slightly at the thought that I was being perved on in a fucking strip club. It would figure that dirty old men surrounded by gorgeous, sweaty strippers would perv on the fucking lesbian just trying to enjoy her best mate's bachelor party. I glanced around quickly, surprised to not catch a single pair of eyes staring me down. I shrugged it off once again, figuring I was just being overly paranoid.

-----

A few moments later, I stumbled out of the toilet with a shit eating grin on my face. The alcohol was finally allowing me to enjoy myself in this hole, which was not that fucking bad now that I thought about it. I continued my journey back to the party not really paying attention to my surroundings, when out of nowhere I collided with something hard. Jesus, no time like the present to be a fucking klutz, right? I stumbled back, dazed, and shook my head slightly. I looked up to see what I had bumped into and fell into the deepest pair of brown eyes I had ever seen. The girl smiled slightly as I gazed at her, and I could feel my cheeks flushing heavily. Fuck me she was beautiful.

As I allowed my eyes to trail all over her seemingly flawless body, everything seemed to move in slow motion. For someone as short as she was, her legs seemed to go on forever! Her small, shapely hips were hugged tightly by a pair of tiny shorts that accentuated her small curves perfectly. I traced my eyes up to her exposed midriff where I found a glimmering piece of red and silver jewelery hanging delicately from her perfect belly button. I subconsciously licked my lips as my eyes settled on her chest, which was barely covered by a black, vest like top might I add.I knew I was being a total perv, but this was a fucking strip club! I was _supposed_ to leer at fucking beautiful women. My eyes continued their upward journey and I noticed bright red hair cascading around her shoulders. I felt myself catch on fire as I gazed at her perfect neck. Fuck I'd like to chew on that thing for about a week.

My eyes finally met hers, and I swallowed audibly. Her full, red lips were quirked into a sexy smirk that seemed to say, 'yes darling, I am extremely fuckable.' I silently cursed myself for being the most uncool person on the planet and practically drooling all over her. I allowed my lips to curl into a confident smile, but there was hardly an ounce of confidence behind it.

"Sorry, my fault. I'm such a tit," I managed to spit out, surprising myself with the amount of false confidence I was able to inject into my voice.

"It's no problem," she responded in low, husky voice that made every hair in my body stand up as straight as a fucking military cadet. "It's hardly bothersome to collide with a gorgeous woman, especially one that eye fucks me afterwards."

"Oh, um, right…" I responded, chuckling nervously and bowing my head slightly. Shit, she fucking noticed. Well, how could she not? I was being about as subtle as a fucking fire alarm. I bit my bottom lip slightly and looked up again to face her. I felt my mouth go dry as I watched her tuck her bottom lip under her teeth just as I had done seconds earlier. I think it's safe to say that, that little action was the sexiest thing I have ever seen. Christ, if I looked like that every time I bit my fucking lip I wouldn't be able to stop fucking myself. Okay, that sounded weird, but you get what I mean.

I snapped out of my internal reverie and noticed the girl's eyes travelling all over my body. The hungry look in her eyes was hot enough to make me sure I was soaking through my jeans. I shivered under her gaze, the distance between us was suddenly on fire. She was leering at me so hard I momentarily wondered if I had accidently left my jeans in the toilet. I laughed internally at the irony of being eye fucked so ferverantly by a stripper.

A stripper! Right. I suddenly felt deflated as I realized that this was probably all an act to pocket a few extra quid from an unsuspecting, perverted lesbian. I was about to turn away when I noticed how flushed her cheeks were, and how her pupils had almost taken over her chocolate brown eyes. I smiled proudly in spite of myself. Yeah, she totally thinks I'm hot. That's right, the most beautiful fucking girl I've ever seen is staring at me like she wants to taste every inch of me. Fucking awesome.

I continued to watch her, slack jawed as she took a tentative step towards me. She was so close now I could smell her perfume. She smelled amazing, like cherries, and something else I just couldn't put my finger on. My breath hitched as her face was within inches of mine. I held my breath, unsure of what to expect as her face drifted closer and closer to my own. I could feel her hot breath on my lips, and felt my eyes start to fall shut. But as quickly as it was there, it was gone, as her face moved past mine. My eyes shot open when I felt her lips lightly tickling my ear. We were barely touching, yet I had never been so fucking turned on in my entire life. I shuddered as she whispered in my ear.

"Just thought I'd return the favor."

And with that, she was gone. Back towards the bar without as much as a glance over her shoulder. What. The. Fuck. I felt my legs wobble again, but I knew it wasn't from the alcohol this time. I shook my head violently in an attempt to snap myself out of my lust filled haze. I spun around, spotting Cook who had moved to one of the couches in the corner. He was currently unaccompanied, but I followed his heavy gaze to the stunning brunette that had been dancing for him earlier. I stumbled over to him, plopping down next to him and laughing loudly at the look on his face.

"Glad to see I'm not the only one who wants to fuck a stripper tonight,"

Cook looked at me like I had thirty small heads sticking out of my neck singing show tunes to him. "Fuck off blondie, I'm getting married, I don't want to fuck her."

"Just because you're getting married doesn't mean you stop wanting to fuck people Cookie."

"Yeah well, chillax blondie, aint nothing gonna happen, alright? And what's this about you, I thought you didn't do strippers," he asked slurring slightly and grinning at me.

"I don't, but that's before I practically ran into an extremely fuckable redhead," I answered, my eyes glazing over slightly as I pictured myself sucking on her bottom lip. "Especially after we spent the last five minutes practically eye fucking each other."

"Atta girl Naomikins," Cook slurred, pushing himself up to high five me sloppily. He look back towards the brunette stripper and waved her over, causing my to raise an eyebrow at him questioningly. He just laughed and shoved me slightly as the brunette reached us.

"What do ya say, Naomikins, fancy a dance?"

"Thanks anyway Cook, she's all yours," I responded, flashing him a winning smile and shuffling myself over to a nearby vacant couch so he could have some privacy. Fuck, good thing Michelle would never find out about any of this. She'd cut his balls off for the way he was looking at that brunette.

I leaned back heavily into the couch and allowed my eyes to fall shut. I pictured the redhead, feeling myself get hot at just the thought of her. Fuck, I was going to have to find some time to relieve my sexual frustration before I passed out later on. I knew I was in the middle of a fucking strip club, but I was beginning to feel myself drift off. I felt a body plop down next to me and I figured Cook or one of the other blokes had decided to join me. I opened my eyes and came face to face with a slightly familiar pair of tits.

"Good dreams?" I heard that husky voice ask and I dragged my eyes up to meet hers. She looked positively ravishing. Her red hair had fallen slightly in her eyes as she looked down at me, and the look on her face screamed 'I want to fuck you.' I pushed myself up slightly so we were face to face and smiled brightly.

"I thought since you so clearly liked what you saw earlier," she whispered seductively, accentuating every word carefully as she licked her lips. "I would come over and see if there's anything I can offer you."

My mouth went bone dry and I swear my heart stopped fully for a few seconds. Anything she could offer me? What exactly did that entail? Despite my obvious confusion, it was all I could do not to scream yes at the top of my lungs when she was looking at me like that. I couldn't deny my barely controllable lust for the girl in front of me, but I was still slightly unsure. For some reason, it bothered me to think that I wasn't the only person she had ever done this for. Maybe this was something she pulled every week, and I was just the newest target. I watched her gaze at me expectantly, clearly amused at the look my face was currently sporting. I was sure she found me attractive, but she was a stripper, I could hardly trust that to be genuine. Fuck, why am I so concerned about this, maybe this isn't such a good idea.

I shook my head and opened my mouth to speak, but I found myself being shushed as a pair of soft fingers touched my lips. I could feel myself trembling under her touch. She gave me a sexy smirk and slid her hand into mine. Before I knew what was happening, she was dragging me through the club towards the back. I glanced over my shoulder momentarily to find Cook and the brunette stripper staring at us. Cook's jaw was almost on the floor, but he quickly gave me a thumbs up. The brunette simply winked and shot me an annoying smile. Why does it seem to me like she knows something?

I found myself in a small dimly lit room that was clearly one of the clubs private rooms. Fuck, how much was this going to cost me to be in here? The room was completely covered in red. Red floors, red walls, and a red couch in front of the back wall. I heard the door click shut behind me, and I suddenly felt a pair of hands gripping lightly at my hips. She spun me around so we were standing face to face, and right away I watched her eyes darken with lust. I opened my mouth to speak, but she was quicker than I was. She pushed me back onto the couch, and quickly straddled me.

"Don't worry," she whispered softly as she leaned in toward my ear, "this, has nothing to do with work or money."

I gasped as I felt her bite my earlobe, and my centre suddenly felt hotter and wetter than ever before. I considered her words and the comprehension of what she meant came slowly through my lust filled mind. I smiled slightly as I realized she was as overtaken by lust as I was. I gasped as I felt her begin to suck on my neck, my body finally responding to her minstrations. I tangled one of my hands in her hair and with my other hand I traced circles over the exposed part of her back. Her skin was on fire, and I could feel her shivering beneath my touch. She pulled away from my neck suddenely, and leaned back to look at me. Her eyes were the darkest shade of brown I've ever seen, and her hair had fallen slightly in her face making her look unbelievably sexy. She leaned in slightly and took my bottom lip between her teeth, biting down slightly. I felt like I was drowning in her as she continued to stare at me, unmoving. An overwhelming wave of courage overtook me and I grabbed the back of her neck, forcefully crashing our lips together. Within seconds the kiss had deepened and our tongues were swirling together roughly.

Christ, she tasted fucking amazing.

She began unbuttoning my shirt as we continued to kiss, and I leaned forward slightly so she could slip it off my shoulders. She broke away from my lips and began kissing down my chest, sucking, biting, and licking every inch of me. I could feel her leaving marks, but I couldn't even bring myself to care as I moaned loudly. I pulled her back up and crashed our lips together once again as I practically ripped her top off of her shoulders. She let out a low growl as I leaned in to bite her neck, and she forcefully pulled me backwards so I was on top of her on the floor. We continued assaulting each other with our tongues, drinking each other in as our hands were fumbling wildly around each others bodies. My fingers found the clasp to her bra and I quickly slipped it off her shoulders. I leaned back and gazed down at the sight in front of me, fuck, she was so fucking gorgeous. I couldn't speak. The effect she was having on me was preventing me from forming words, so I simply leaned down and attacked her perfect breasts with my mouth.

She gasped loudly as I began teasing her nipple with my tongue. My hands continued to fumble around and found the button to her shorts. I leaned back to pull them off of her, underwear at all, and felt my vision go cloudy when I realized she was beneath me completely naked.

Before I knew what was happening, she had flipped me onto my back and ripped the rest of my clothes off. She jumped back on top of me and I felt her thigh press roughly between my legs as our mouths crashed together once again. I shifted slightly and without warning I buried two fingers inside of her. Fuck she was so wet. She gasped and swore loudly as I entered her, and I could feel her beginning to grind against me as my fingers curled inside her. I pumped in and out of her, brushing my thumb over her clit incessantly as she began to pant loudly in my ear. Suddenely I felt her fingers running along my wet folds and before I knew it I was panting along with her as she plunged her fingers into my sopping wet core.

I pushed my mouth to hers again, strangling the scream that was threatening to erupt from me as her tongue swriled with mine. Fuck I was so close. She pulled away from me again and began moaning loudly and panting in my ear.

"I'm so fucking close," she panted into my ear, and I curled my fingers upwards as I felt my own orgasm begin to rip through me. I was shuddering and seeing stars, and I knew I had pushed her over the edge as well. We screamed and swore as we both came down from our highs, and I cringed in ecstasy as I felt her bite my neck hard enough to break the skin. I felt her collapse into me, still breathing heavily into my ear as I carefully removed my fingers from her.

The last thing I remembered before drifting off into a post-sex coma was her whispering, "fuck me, that was incredible."

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I woke up alone not long after and noticed that I was wearing all of my clothes again. My shirt was still unbuttoned, but otherwise I was decent. I looked around the red room and was disappointed to see no sign of the gorgeous red head that had just fucked me senseless. Fucking hell that was amazing.

I sat up and pushed my hair out of my eyes. I felt something rough as I touched my face and was surprised to find a small sticky note stuck on the inside of my palm. I brought it up to my eyes and tried to focus on it as my vision was still spinning.

_That was fun, we should do it again sometime ;) – E_

Fuck, I didn't even know her name.

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**Thoughts?**


	2. Long Division

**Author's note:**

**Wow. I am so happy at all of the positive response this has gotten! I really did not expect it at all! Thank you so, so, SO much to everyone who reviewed, alerted, favorited, or even read the previous chapter! I appreciate it alot, I felt like a giddy little school girl when I read them all this morning.**

**Now that this is going to be an actual story, I had to come up with a plot that could do it justice. I knew there was a lot of different directions I could take it in, but I was struck by an idea that I think you all will just love. I hope you won't be disappointed that this chapter isn't all bang, bang, bangitty, bang, bu bang bang (How I met your mother anyone? No... alright then.) Anyway, this here is a little bit of character development, but I promise more goodness in the next chpater that I am just about finished with! I'll try my best to keep the hotness level that you all seemed to love at it's maximum, but I hope you'll enjoy the story itself as well. I promise you, it'll be good.**

**Although I'm pretty sure I know the direction I'm going to take, I wouldn't mind hearing some suggestions of what you would all like to see happen :)**

**And that's it, enjoy!**

**-------**

My eyes cracked open and I groaned loudly as I was momentarily blinded by the flash of light that was assaulting my retinas. I jumped out of my bed and pulled the curtains together, effectively banishing the sunlight from my bedroom. To say I felt fucking awful would be the understatement of the century. I felt like my head weighed about a thousand pounds and my chest burned like someone had damn well poured a cup of molten lava down my throat. I tried to swear out against my pain, but I managed nothing but a barely audible croak when I opened my mouth to speak. I slowly stumbled towards my mini fridge in the corner of my room and pulled out a bottle of water. I downed almost all of it in a few short gulps and clumsily made my way back towards the bed. Fuck me, last night was eventful.

The night came back to me in short bursts and I quickly remembered the events that had transpired. Fucking hell, I really did nail that stripper didn't I? Jesus Christ, I didn't think I had the balls for that kind of stuff anymore. I groaned as I looked at myself in the mirror on my door. I looked like I had gotten roughed up. I touched my neck and cringed slightly as I ran my fingers over the fresh wound that the redhead had left there. I smiled slightly as I thought about her, but I quickly shook my head in an attempt to change my train of thought. I don't even know her shitting name for fuck's sakes, so why the hell am I sitting here swooning like a fucking school girl over the fact that she nearly took a piece out of me.

So I fucked her. No big deal, right?

It was a fucking mint shag though, I'm telling you. I don't think I ever came so hard in my entire life. I allowed my eyes to fall shut and began to picture her smiling seductively before biting her bottom lip to supress a moan. I felt myself shivering as I trailed my hands down my chest, tracing the path her lips had travelled along. I could still feel her hands on me, as if her touch had burned through my skin, marking me forever. Bloody hell, what is wrong with me? But I can't fucking help it. There was just something about her. And it was more than her seductive smile and the way her flawless body had surrendered to my own before twisting and convulsing in an unimaginably beautiful ecstasy. No, there was something in her eyes. Something that seemed so fragile, yet so untouchable. It was so fucking intruiging, I was practically squirming to know more about her. Yet I didn't even know her name.

Even more confusing was the post it note she had stuck to the inside of my palm. How were we supposed to do that again when I didn't even know how to find her? I suppose I could go back to the strip club, but I'd probably look a bit stupid if I didn't even know who I was asking for. E. What kind of names start with E anyway? Emma, Evelyn, Erica, Erin, Ella, Eartha, fuck I hope her name isn't Eartha.

"Fuck sakes," I muttered out loud as I lay back on my bed.

I lay there for several moments, my thoughts of the redhead practically flooding the room as they overflowed in my mind. I was snapped out of my reverie by my phone suddenly buzzing near my head. I rolled over, quickly finding it among the sheets and flicked it open to discover I had two new messages and four missed calls from Cook. Fucking hell, I had just deserted him last night hadn't I? I suppose I was pretty out of it after I had flitted off to fuck the stripper, and I'm pretty sure I couldn't find him afterwards anyway. I remembered stumbling back into the practically empty club after I composed myself, and the beautiful redhead was of course nowhere to be seen. I wasn't surprised, but I had felt slightly dejected as I stepped out into the cool night air to start my long journey home.

I opened Cook's message and felt my eyebrows shoot up to my hairline as I read it over.

_Alright Naomikins? Need to have a chat w/ ya. Coming to yours, 1ish?_

Fucking fuck. What time was it? I snapped my phone shut and rolled over to check my bedside table. I breathed a sigh of relief when I discovered it was only 11:00. Thank fuck, I had time to make myself look half decent. I hardly felt like sporting the 'just ravished' look around Cook, I knew the consequences of that far too well. Then I suddenly remembed that he had seen the stripper dragging me through the club before we had disappeared into one of the private rooms. Shit. I guess there was no hiding it, hey? Well I suppose I could still at least make myself look presentable.

I began to drag myself out of bed before quickly remembering that I had another text. I flipped my phone back open and clicked open the second message.

_Hey babe, hope you had fun last night with Cook, call me later :). - Tay_

Fuck. Right, my girlfriend.

Did I mention her? No? Well, that's because technically she's not my girlfriend. She probably thinks she is though, I believe she mentioned it once and to be honest, I never really disagreed. But she's fucking boring. I guess the only reason I've kept her around this long is that I've got myself convinced I need to settle down into a normal life. That and well, she is pretty fit.

"Fuck," I exclaimed loudly as I caught sight of my love bites in the mirror again. How the fuck am I going to explain this one? I surprised myself when I realized that I didn't really care about hiding them. It was about time I end things with Tay. I've never really cared about her like I should anyway, and she doesn't deserve to be strung along. I knew these thoughts had entered my mind before, but I always shrugged them off. Tay was safe, she was stable, and she fucking cared about me. But other than her being hot, I felt almost nothing for her. That girl from last night though, she ignited something in me that I haven't felt before. Fucking hell, what the fuck has she done to me? Am I really considering throwing my nice, safe, and boring potential relationship away over a one night stand with a stripper?

I finally pulled myself out of my moping a few moments later and dragged myself off to the shower. I tried to fill my thoughts with mundane things; work, Tay, fucking diet pop. But every time I thought I'd got my thoughts under control, I'd see a flash of red, and suddenly my body was burning under her touch again. The water cascaded around my body and I turned the nozzle so that it would be slightly colder than I would normally have it. It cooled me off a little, but I still felt like I was on fire. Fucking hell, I just can't get this girl out my head.

I turned off the shower, unable to stand being in there any longer, and stepped out into the cool air. I quickly wrapped myself up in a towel and headed back into my bedroom, flicking on my ipod speakers as I went. I sighed happily as I heard the familiar indie rock beats of Long Division by Death Cab For Cutie beginning to fill my room. I began shuffling around my room, belting the words out as I dressed myself.

_He's always distracted by the very mention of an open door_

'_Cause he had sworn not to be what he'd been before_

I realized as soon as the words escaped my lips that it was as if I was suddenly singing about myself. My mouth formed as perfect "O" shape, as I dove across my room in nothing but my bra and panties to switch the song. I pushed the shuffle button and felt relief wash over me as Obstacle 1 started up.

_I wish I could eat the salt off of your lost faded lips_

"Fuck" I exclaimed loudly, as a jumped back towards my ipod to switch the song again. Red Heart. Disposition. Fuck. Turn Me On, O My Heart,Sparks, Mass Romantic, Lovesick, fucking hell is there a single sodding song here that's not about how much I want to see that fucking redhead again? I skip to the next song again. Redhead Walking by REM.

"You've got to be fucking shitting me," I scream, throwing my ipod in a random direction as I bury my head in my hands. What the fuck is happening to me?

I hear the ipod hit the table and instead of shutting off it switchs to the next song on the list.

_All along the western front, people line up to receive_

_She got the power in her hands, to shock you like you won't believe_

"Fucking hell," I mutter, grabbing my ipod and finally shutting the damn thing off. As if I really needed it to be drilled into me that I can't get this fucking girl off my mind.

---------

About an hour later, I had finally managed to make myself look somewhat presentable. I threw on a pair of tight jeans and a blue and white plaid top, tying a matching blue scarf around my neck to give myself at least a little bit of modesty. I did my make up quickly so I didn't look like I hadn't slept in a fucking week, and let my blonde hair fall in loose curls around my shoulders. I looked at myself in the mirror and nodded approvingly before heading off to the kitchen to find something to keep myself occupied.

By the time Cook had buzzed my apartment I had made a huge brunch and pretty much cleaned every inch of my flat to keep my mind busy. I ran to the intercom to buzz him in, tripping over a misplaced stool and swearing loudly as I tumbled to the floor. Christ, I just don't stop do I?

A few seconds later I heard my door click open and I turned around to face a very tired looking Cook staring back at me.

"Christ blondie, you look like fucking hell," he said with a chuckle.

Well, can't say I didn't try.

"Thanks Cook, you don't look too bad yourself. Seriously, you wear the 'I haven't slept or showered look' very well."

"Tit."

"Tosser."

"Lezzer."

"Oi, fuck you," I teased, chuckling when he threw a wink in my direction before plopping himself on my couch. He looked conflicted, like he had something he needed to tell me, but I knew I had something to tell him first.

"Cook."

"Naomi."

"I'm breaking up with Tay."

"I'm calling off the wedding."

"What? Why?!" we both exclaimed simultaneously as we continued to try and talk over each other.

"I slept with the stripper," we both muttered in unison once again.

The room was filled with silence as we both stared each other down. I sighed sadly and shuffled over and sat down next him, resting my head on his shoulder.

"Well aren't we a pair," he mumbled somewhat bitterly.

"What happened to us, Cook? I thought we got past this."

"So did I, Naomikin, so did I."

We sat in silence for a bit, relishing each others company. I was so grateful for Cook, he was always there for me no matter what; he always understood. We were so alike, me and him. So fucked up, so seemingly untameable, but so wonderful in our own strange ways. This was just like us. We always ran when things got difficult. We'd made so much goddamn progress in the last few years. Finally settled down you know? For Christsake, Cook was about to get married. And me? Well I'd settled into a safe, boring life, with a safe, boring job, and a safe, boring girlfriend that I could barely acknowledge. But maybe that was how Cook felt about Michelle as well, maybe he didn't feel the fire either. But that's what growing up was all about right? Settling in to safe, boring relationships?

One thing was for certain though; last night had ignited something in both of us that we had spent the last few years trying to fight off.

"Cook," I started slowly. When he turned to face me, I continued, "I just can't live without…"

"Passion," he finished for me, his lips curling up into a sad smile.

There is was; we were both fucked.

"How did this happen Cook? We were doing so fucking well! Doesn't it seem a bit silly that we're about to throw all of this away over one night stands with strippers!"

"The heart wants what it wants babe. I don't know about you, but there hasn't been a minute since it happened that I haven't thought about shoving my face in her tits again."

I grimaced slightly at his crude expression of affection for the brunette stripper, but laughed softly anyway.

"Well, I would have put it a little more eloquently than that, but yeah I know what you mean."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," I replied chuckling slightly as I recalled the state I'd been in all morning. "I practically destroyed my ipod because every fucking song made me feel like she was touching me again."

"Jesus Naomikins, and I thought I was bad," he replied, howling with laughter.

"Oh shut up," I said, hitting him in the face with a nearby pillow.

"Get her name?" he asked, suddenly serious. I shook my head sadly and he nodded.

"You?"

He simply shook his head in response, wearing a sad smile that I'm sure mirrored my own.

"So… what do we do now?"

He seemed to consider the question for a moment before turning back to face me.

"Well," he started, "I say we grab our phones, break it off with our women, and go out and get shitfaced tonight."

"Are you sure you can do that?" I asked with sincere concern. I knew breaking it off with Michelle meant a lot more to Cook than breaking it off with Tay meant to me.

"It's gotta be done Naomikins, it's gotta be done," he answered, smiling sadly. I really felt for him as I saw the frightened look in his eyes. Cook really was a good guy, and I knew he cared about Michelle. But she just wasn't the one.

"Then what?" I asked tentatively, "we go back to living the way we used to?"

"No, Naomikins. Tomorrow, we go see us some strippers."


	3. Combat Baby

**Author's note:**

**Okay, I was going to wait and post this tomorrow... but judging from tonight's episode and the clips for next weeks on the e4 website... I reckoned I had better post it now. Fuck... "I love you," "Don't lie." Doesn't sound too promising does it? I haven't actually seen the episode yet since I am Canadian... so if anyone knows a good link where I don't have to fill out a fucking survey to watch it, I would greatly appreciate it if you would pm it to me.**

**To answer a question poised to me: no, no, no NO! Cook and Emily did not, I repeat NOT sleep with each other. I re-read the first two chapters closely and I really don't think I made it sound like they did. You've gotta look into my subtleness :)**

**Also, thank you to everyone who review chapter 2. I realize it wasn't as exciting as the first chapter, but it had to be done in order to make this into a proper story. Hopefully this will make up for it ;)**

* * *

We didn't go back to the club the next night. I think we were still much too freaked out about everything that we were suddenly feeling to face that hurdle just yet. We did end things with our respective partners though, and fuck was that ever messy. I don't think I ever heard that much crying in my entire life, and that was just from Cook! The poor boy was really torn up about having to end things, but he knew it was the right thing to do. Michelle had screamed at him, called him immature and swore him down to the dirt; and he just stood there and took it. He knew it was what he deserved. I felt awful for him, because I knew he really cared about Michelle. But he knew he couldn't give her what she wanted, so they just weren't meant to be together.

My break up had gone a little better, but only a little. I didn't think we were that serious, but apparently Tay thought we were about to float off into happily ever after. Fucking naïve, that girl. She screamed and swore at me, and I was much too tired to argue with her. So I just let her have her conselation prize of spitting out everything she hated about me and calling me every horrible name she could think of. I even put down the phone for a bit to have a fag, not like she noticed anyway.

When it was finally over I think Cook and I both felt quite relieved. They were never what we truly wanted anyway, we had just attempted to convince ourselves otherwise.

Afterwards we headed out to a nearby pub and got pissed. And by pissed, I mean I can't remember a fucking thing that happened. Good thing I'm on leave from work until next Monday, because now I've got a hangover the size of fucking Australia and Cook is already texting me to go out again tonight. Fucking hell, my psyche may want to me to go back to living like this, but I don't know if my body can handle it anymore. I mean, I'm fucking 28 years old. When am I going to actually grow out of this?

I texted Cook back and told him to meet me here at 10:00.

I guess I'm not growing out of it tonight.

---------

It's just after midnight, and I am beyond pissed once again. Cook and I are jumping around on the crowded dance floor, screaming and yelling like fucking lunatics. But it doesn't matter, because everyone else is going crazy as well. The DJ tonight is fucking epic. He's playing this awesome club remix of Combat Baby by Metric, and there is currently a fit girl grinding her tits into my back. The shit eating grin on my face told the world that I couldn't be happier, it was just like old times. But I knew my eyes said differently.

I glanced over at Cook, who was currently grinding into some blonde with a nice arse, and motioned to him that I was going to the toilet. He just nodded and continued to grope the girl in front of him. I pushed myself away from the girl behind me and made my way through the crowd.

I finally found the toilet, which thankfully was a single, and shut the door behind me. I stumbled over to the sink, barely able to control the effect the alcohol was having on me. I turned the water on and leaned down to splash some of it over my face. I studied myself in the mirror after I wiped my face dry. Fuck, why wasn't I having a good time? This was what I wanted wasn't it?

No, it wasn't, and I knew that.

What I wanted was to get another taste of the fucking red haired girl that had been assaulting my thoughts every second for the past two days. Fucking Christ, I met her once, and I didn't even know her name. And, oh yeah, she was a fucking stripper! Why did I keep forgetting that?

I heard the door click open behind me and I was suprised because I could swear I had fucking locked it. I spun around, about to tell whoever had intruded on my alone time to fuck right off only to find myself face to face with the current object of my desire.

She just stood there smirking at me as I felt my jaw touch the floor. Fucking hell, she looked just as fucking tasty as she had the other night. She was wearing a bit more clothes though, which was a shame, but she still looked sexier than any other girl wearing nothing but her knickers. She had on a short, black skirt that made her legs look absolutely incredible, and a flowing purple tank top covered her torso. Her hair was slightly pulled back so that I could see the extremely hot industrial piercings in her ears. I had never been much for piercings, but those and that belly button piercing of hers just made me squirm in all the right ways.

And fuck, she was looking at me like she was going to eat me alive. God I hope she's going to eat me alive.

"Hello again lover," she practically purred in a tone that caused my already damp panties to practically flood. She took a step toward me and I shook my head to snap myself out of the daze I had suddenly stumbled into.

"Uh, hi," I responded, trying to sound at least somewhat confident. She continued to slink towards me and heard myself gulping slightly.

"I was disappointed you didn't come back to see me yesterday," she whispered, trailing her fingertips along my arm. I shuddered at the contact and hoped that it wasn't noticable how fucking hot she was making me.

"Why?" I asked, laughing uncomfortably as she stepped even closer to me. I felt my cheeks flushing as I continued. "A gorgeous girl like you could have anyone she wanted, you don't need someone like me hanging off you."

"I could say the same about you," she replied huskily, slipping her arms around my waist. Jesus she smelled so fucking good. "And she just because I didn't need you to come, doesn't mean I didn't want you to."

She leaned in, barely kissing the corner of my mouth. I could feel the electricity surrounding us burning my skin.

It should be fucking illegal to be this sexy.

She brought one of her hands to my cheek, tenderly stroking my jaw line as she pulled back slightly to gaze into my eyes. I could feel myself succumbing to her will. There were so many questions I wanted to ask her, but my mind was beginning to cloud. She was fucking irresistable.

I leaned forward, capturing her lips with my own in a heated kiss. I grabbed her shoulders and forcefully spun her around, slamming her into the wall behind us. She arched her back slightly and looked at me like I was the sexiest fucking person alive before kissing me again hungrily. Jesus, I guess she liked it rough.

She grabbed the back of my hips, pulling me so close to her that our bodies were practically melding together, and grinded hard up against me. She was kissing me so hard I was sure my lips were already bruising. Fuck, it was like she couldn't get enough of me. I had never felt more attractive or irresistable in my entire life.

She dug her nails into me hard enough to break the skin as she kept trying to pull me closer than was physically possible. My hands were tangled in her hair, and I let them travel down her body, grasping at the hem of her top. I broke our searing kiss, causing her to whimper slightly at the loss of contact. She tried to capture my lips again, but I swiftly yanked her shirt over her head and attacked her neck instead.

I heard her take a sharp breath as I sucked on her pulsepoint and began to knead one of her perfect breasts. I traced my mouth and tongue all over her exposed shoulder, biting down softly when tasting her on my tongue was simply not enough. She was gasping and moaning with every move I made, and I felt her begin to shiver as I started tracing my free hand up the inside of her thigh.

She grabbed my hair roughly, dragging me back up towards her. She tangled both of her hands in my hair and kissed me hard. I dug my nails into her leg as she wrapped it around my waist, still pulling me impossibly closer. I could feel how wet she was as my exposed hip made contact with her centre, causing her to pull away from our kiss. Her eyes rolled back in her head before falling shut as I continued grinding into her. I attacked her neck hungrily once again.

I continued kissing down her body, and soon I was on my knees, trailing kisses over her exposed stomach. Her breathing was ragged, and she was pulling at my hair to try and make me come back up to her. But I couldn't do it, I just had to fucking taste her. I slipped my hands under her skirt, pulling her knickers off with haste and tossing them aside. I looked up at her a final time, and she looked positively ravishing. Her eyes were heavy lidded, and her luscious lips were plump and bruised from how roughly I had attacked them. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly as her breathing was coming in short, staggered bursts. I looked back down to my destination and pushed my head underneath her skirt. I heard her moan loudly as I ran my tongue over her folds, tasting the wetness that was waiting for me.

Fuck, she tasted so fucking good.

She grabbed my hair, pushing my face impossibly closer as I continued tasting her. I could hear her swearing and moaning above me, but I was in a complete daze. I lapped up every bit of her, wanting to taste every part of her I could. She began panting heavily as my tongue found her bundle of nerves. I attacked her clit with abandon, licking and sucking on it as she continued to buck her hips wildly. My hands we cupping her perfect arse now, as I tried to pull myself closer and closer to her.

Her hands left my hair suddenly, and I could hear her smacking the wall behind us. She was fucking close.

I sped up my actions, my tongue moving in a furious whir all over her. I felt her knees begin to buckle and I held her steady as a continuous scream of swearing began to flood from her mouth. She was holding my shoulders now, trying to stop herself from collapsing as her orgasm ripped through her. I sucked on her clit as hard as I could, trying to prolong her orgasm as long as possible. Her nails were digging into my shoulders as she continued to shudder. Fuck, I think I just made her come twice.

She finally stopped screaming and I pulled myself back to allow her to collapse into my arms. She was still shaking and panting heavily when we came face to face.

"Fuck," she muttered through her ragged breathing, causing me to smile proudly. She leaned forward and kissed me softly, almost as if she was thanking me for something.

But before I could stop her, she was on her feet again. She wobbled slightly as she put her shirt and knickers back on, and I just sat there on the floor looking at her incredulously.

She finally looked back at me, and for some reason, she looked torn. But as quick as the look was there, it was gone, and it was replaced instead by that confident, sexy look I had seen her wearing so many times before.

"Thanks gorgeous," she purred, trying to sound assured, but her voice was slightly shaky. She turned to leave, but I jumped to my feet and grabbed her wrist.

"Wait."

She stopped dead, but she didn't turn around, I could feel her trembling slightly under my touch. Fuck I had so many questions, but my mind was still almost nothing but a sex filled haze.

"What's your name?"

She didn't answer right away. After a few beats she shook her head softly, and whispered.

"Just call me Red."

And with that, she was gone again

----

I gave myself a few minutes to recuperate before I headed back into the club. Fucking hell, that girl was going to be the death of me. I brushed my fingers over my kiss swollen lips as I gazed at myself in the mirror, and then licked them softly. I could still taste her.

What the fuck was that all about anyway? She just turned up out of nowhere and suddenly we're fucking up against a wall. I had so many questions I wanted to ask her, and I didn't even manage to get her fucking name. I'm such a useless cow sometimes.

But I couldn't control myself when I was with her, it was like she had this thrall over me. My skin was still buzzing, a constant reminder of where her hands had been on my body. I shook my head vigorously, trying to shake it off, but I couldn't hide from the fact that I would do almost anything to know more about my mysterious redheaded lover.

I finally forced myself to leave the toilet, bowing my head in embarrassment as the pissed off looking people in the queue glared at me. I glanced around the club, hoping the catch a glimpse of that familiar red hair moving through the crowd. I did spot Cook however. He was standing near the bar looking extremely dazed and I quickly made my way over to him.

"Hey blondie," he slurred as he spotted me. "How's the night then?"

"Come on Cook, we're leaving. Let's go back to mine," I yelled in his ear to make sure he heard me. My encounter with the stripper had left me dead sober and more than anything I just wanted to get out of there so that I could talk to my best friend about it. Before he could answer, a voice rang out behind me.

"Naomi, James," the voice said in a menacing tone.

I turned around only to find myself staring into the angry eyes of none other than Michelle. Fuck, she looked pissed. I glanced behind her, noticing three extremely big, extremely angry looking guys standing there. Shit.

"Mind if we have a word outside?"


	4. Here In Your Arms

**Author's note:**

**Thanks again for all the reviews guys, they make me feel giddy :)**

**Here is a nice, long update :) It's a present because I won't be able to get another one up this week :(. I hope you can forgive me, but of course you can still look forward to the many other amazing fics on here, and the series four finale! I hope all this "tl" business is not a trick, I will just die if it is because it was WAY too beautiful. I'm so excited I can barely wait, and I have to wait until they upload it here to watch it :(.**

**Anywho, I hope you enjoy this, the story is starting to develop so it gets pretty interesting from here on out. I have chapter 5 like half written, so who knows, maybe I'll manage to get it up a little sooner. ;)**

* * *

I lay on my back on top of my couch, a flimsy blanket thrown loosley around my middle as I stared at the ceiling in quiet contemplation. I could hardly remember how many hours I'd been there for. The piercing rays of the morning sun were beginning to seep into the room, reminding me that it would probably be a good idea for me to sleep. But my mind simply wouldn't stop working. It felt like it was running a thousand miles a minute.

In the previous hours I had gotten pissed, punched, been to the hospital, and fucked the sexiest girl alive. I'd call that an eventful evening wouldn't you?

Michelle and her goons she called cousins had dragged Cook out of the club by the scruff of his neck, pounding the shit out of him once they got him outside. I followed, helplessly of course, screaming and shouting for them to fuck off until Michelle sucker punched me right in the mouth. I'm telling you, she might not look like much, but that girl can throw a mean right hook.

Luckily, the bouncers had come round the back of the club a few moments later, causing Michelle and her band of muscle bound tossers to do a runner. Cook was lucky. He'd escaped with nothing more than a broken nose, a black eye, and a gash on his head from when one of the goons decided to bash him with a discarded piece of pipeline. I know that sounds pretty bad, but he's lucky those bastards didn't kill him. I walked away with nothing more than a lip twice the size of Michelle's fist. No matter though, it could have been a lot worse, that's for sure.

After we'd been cleaned up at the hospital, I dragged Cook back to sleep it off at mine. He was currently passed out in my bed, snoring loudly and tossing and turning every now and then. And I was laying on the couch, my mind unable to rest as I attempted to process the events that had transpired in the last forty-eight hours. But it wasn't the fights, the drunks, or the breakups that were causing my poor brain to go into sodding overdrive. It was that bloody stripper.

Red.

She couldn't even tell me her fucking name and here I am obsessing about her in every sense of the word. It's worse than it was the first time, I felt like there was an electric current pulsing through my body. Every part of me ached with the memory of her touching me, and I could still taste her musty sweetness in my mouth, on my tongue, on my lips...

I felt like my entire body has just come alive after years of hibernation.

Everything about our two sordid encounters had been so amazing, so passionate. If I was honest with myself, it was both the best and worst thing I had ever felt in my life. She was so mysterious, so passionate, and so fucking sexy that my brain could barely comprehend that she was actually real, let alone the fact that she seemed to find me just as irresistable as I found her. But there was more to it than that, more than just a primal, insatiable need to possess each other. The way she looked at me for that brief second when it was all over, there was something so fragile behind that confident exterior. Something so wonderful and beautiful that I felt like I would give my entire life just to protect it and watch it flourish.

Christ, I can't actually like this girl, can I? I don't even know her name, and the two times we've been together we've done nothing but shag each other's brains out. Plus, hello, she's a fucking stripper! It's not like I can actually expect something to come out of this, can I?

No, it's just about the sex. I'm just attracted to her.

I take back what I said before,_ that_ was the understatement of the century.

I knew I had to see her again though. The thought of not going back to her made my heart twist in a very unpleasant manner.

I began to trace my fingers along the inside of my thigh, just as I remembered doing to her only hours before. I began to feel myself getting hot under the collar as I brought my other hand to my neck, outlining the marks she had left on me in the heat of the moment with my fingertips. I groaned as I reached into my knickers, discovering that my thoughts of the red head had flooded my folds with arousal. I could feel the sweat dripping from my brow as I worked myself into a frenzy, burying my fingers into myself and crying out softly as I imagined the red head doing it for me. I could almost feel her breath on my bare shoulders and her fingers tangled into my hair as I began to stroke my swollen nub. I began thrashing on the couch, imagining the way her face contorted in agonizing pleasure when I made her come so hard for me. I could feel myself flying over the edge as I pictured the way she had looked at me with such vulnerability before she had left me on the floor of the toilet. I was panting heavily as I came down from my high, and every bit of me was still throbbing from my release.

Christ, I had to see her again.

-----

It had been less than three since I had been there last, yet here I was standing outside the same club I had been at on Wednesday night once again. Tony's Gentlemans Club, funny I hadn't noticed the name when I had been there before. I glanced over at Cook who squeezed my arm reassuringly as we got closer. We were both, admittedly, a lot worse for the wear now than we were the last time we set foot in this place. Just three days ago, we had thought our lives were sorted out. We had relationships, and had settled into a stable way of life, and now suddenly here we were, just three days later and in our minds we had somehow gone back in time to three years ago. Not to mention the fact that we both had insanely throbbing hangovers, my lip was busted open, and Cook's face was a portrait of a bar fight. But regardless of how our lives had suddenly spiraled out of control since the first time we had set foot in this dump, neither of us could deny that we were drawn back to this place.

We were just a few feet from the door when we both stopped. I glanced over at him and he offered me a reassuring smile.

"Alright blondie?"

"Yeah," I answered unsurely, "lets just get this over with."

"Right," he responded with a winning, "We'll go in, find 'em, see that the magic from the other night is gone, and then get the fuck on with our lives."

I nodded in response.

I know that might seem like a far cry from the semi-obsessive state I had been in this morning, but a little bit of time had given me some perspective. There was nothing to this lust but a bit of mystery, passion, and an extremely unfamiliar situation. So I decided I would go back with Cook to see them again. We were sure that another night in the club would erase the romanticism of our predicament. Yep, we would get it out of our systems and then we'd get back to trying to develop into boring, upstanding citizens. Sounds fucking awesome, I know.

Of course, if I was being honest with myself, I knew that, that was not the reason I was there at all.

I hadn't told Cook what had happened last night, and I wasn't going to. I had myself convinced that it was better if I just forgot about it.

I felt slightly self-conscious as we stepped through the doors and the familiar stench of sweat and alcohol filled my nostrils once again. I felt like a total fucking pervert being here twice in four days, but my nerves were quelled slightly by the fact that the club operated as a restaurant as well until 10:00. At least if anyone other than the two strippers we had fucked saw us they could assume we just had an extremely weird taste in Friday night dining options.

We made our way to a booth in the back as quickly as we could. I glanced over at Cook and realized I wasn't the only one who was a bundle of nerves.

"For fuck sakes, what's happened to us Cook? We used to always be ready to talk a fit girl into doing the old rough and tumble with us. And now look at us, we're shaking in our bloody boots over two random girls we don't even fucking know!" I spilled out as we sat down.

Cook looked thoughtful for a few moments before his mouth split into a huge grin.

"Fucking right, Naomikins," he said laughing and patting me heavily on the back. "What do ya say we get a drink here, and then go and paint the fucking town red. See how many girls we can fuck in one night right, just like old times?"

"Sounds good, Mr. Cook," I answered, laughing loudly as we waved a waitress over.

"Yes, can I help you?" she asked in a slightly snotty voice. I turned to face her, observing her features. The room was darkened so I couldn't see her too clearly, but man she looked fucking familiar. She had dark hair, dark brown eyes, and a slightly round face. She was pretty fit, but the bitchy tone in her voice told me I probably wouldn't like her too much. Plus, she looked like the straightest fucking girl I'd ever seen.

"Two pints of Guiness for me and the bird here babe," Cook told her with a big grin on his face.

"Right," she responded, rolling her eyes at us. I raised my eyebrows at her as she stalked off towards the bar and turned back to Cook who was wearing an extremely amused smirk on his face. The bitchy waitress returned a few minutes later with our beer, and Cook and I settled into a rowdy conversation filled with our usual banter. We downed our beer quickly, hiding the fact that we were both extremely anxious to leave with big smiles and loud jokes.

"Alright Naomikins, how about we head off and…" Cook stopped suddenly in mid-sentence. He looked like he had seen a fucking ghost.

"Cook, what the fuck?" I asked, waving my hand in front of his face. Annoyed, I turned around to see what had gotten him so wound up only to come face to face with a vision that made my mouth bone dry.

There they were sauntering towards us, looking just as fucking alluring as they had on the previous night.

My eyes traced over the redhead as she got closer. She was wearing jeans this time, which surprised me slightly. They were really dark and slightly loose, but they hugged her figure in all the right places with a simple black belt holding them in place on her small hips. Her midriff was exposed, showing off a different belly button piercing than I had previously seen her wear. This one didn't dangle, it was just a simple cold blue, heart shaped gem. The redhead's chest was barely covered by a tiny red top that squeezed her cleavage together beautifully, and her hair flowed freely down over her shoulders. Her lips quirked up into that smirk that flooded my knickers every fucking time I saw it.

Christ, I thought this was supposed to help me get passed this.

I shot a look over at Cook who's eyes had glazed over the second he saw the mysterious brunette. Jesus, we must look so pathetic. I gave him a shove and he seemed to snap out of it just in time as the two girls slipped into the booth on either side of us.

"What a nice surprise," the brunette almost whispered in a pleased tone.

"We were starting to think you wouldn't come back," the redhead added, placing a hand on my thigh causing me to blush furiously.

"Yeah well, we had a few things to take care of babe. Didn't we Naomikins?" Cook said, raising his eyebrows at me when I didn't respond right away.

"Yeah, right," I answered, a bit unsurely causing Cook to shoot me an annoyed look.

"Naomi," the redhead whispered seductively. The way she said my name sent chills down my spine. It was as if she was tasting it, savouring it slowly and letting every letter roll its way down her tongue. " I like that," she finished, creeping her hand further up my thigh.

Right, she hadn't known my name either.

I chanced a look over at Cook only to see the brunette tenderly stroking her fingers over his beaten face. I smiled slightly as she leaned in and placed a soft kiss on his lips. It was nice, it was almost like she cared. The moment of tenderness was quickly washed away though, because within seconds the two were full on making out and groping each other.

The hand moving up and down my thigh snapped my head back around to face the redhead next to me. Her eyes were dark and filled with playful lust. She brought her other hand up to my face and her brown eyes momentarily filled with something akin to concern. She traced her soft fingers along my bottom lip tenderly.

"What happened?"

"Do you actually care?" I countered, suprising myself with my own bravery.

She seemed surprised too, she even looked down right taken aback. She lowered her eyes from mine, allowing her hair to fall in her face effectively veiling her expession. Her other hand moved from my thigh and her fingers began tracing patterns along my exposed collar bone. Her eyes found mine once again, her confident façade returning after another brief moment of quiet vulnerability, and I held her strong gaze, daring her to answer me.

"I do," she whispered, suprising me with the sincerity in her voice. I looked away quickly, the intensity in her eyes had quickly become too much to bare. I looked back towards Cook and noticed that he and the brunette had disappeared. Fuck sakes, when did that happen? Didn't take him long anyway.

I felt her fingers curl around my jaw as she pulled my head around to face her again. Her eyes fell back down to my lips as she waited for me to tell her what happened.

"Oh, well… had a bit of a run-in with Cook's – that's my friend with uh… your friend - ex-girlfriend. I guess she wasn't too pleased he broke it off," I answered, chuckling in spite of myself. She continued to look at me, her expression unreadable.

"So, it was your fault then, that they broke up."

My eyes widened in shock at her words. Her expression was still unreadable, jesus she was good at hiding how she was feeling. The way she had spoken those words though, they were so tentative, almost as if she were afraid to hear the answer. I studied her for a bit, hoping to gauge some sort of hint as to what she was getting at it, but it never came.

"No, absolutely not," I finally responded in a definite tone. "Cook is my best mate and nothing more. Besides, after the last two times we saw each other, I kind of figured you got that I'm a big old muff muncher," I finished, smiling nervously at her and waiting for a reaction.

And a reaction I got, a small one, but it was still enough to send my heart soaring off into the clouds. Her eyes lit up, for a brief moment and she leaned forward, brushing a soft kiss over the corner of my lip that had been busted open. She pulled back and stared into my eyes. I gazed back at her, hoping for just a brief second when her defenses would drop and I could get a glimpse of who this girl truly was. My stomach was doing flip flops and my heart was pounding heavily in my chest as she continued to stare at me. Suddenly, I felt like I was the only person in the room, and that's when I knew that I was seeing her. The real her, and not the person she had been around me in our previous encounters. But just like before, as quickly as it was there it was gone, and she dropped her lashes to break our eye contact.

After experiencing that again, I knew I was completely fucked. This girl had me under her spell and there wasn't a bloody thing I could do about it.

"Do you want to get out of here?"

I heard the words, but I wasn't sure I said them. They came out so assured and so confident, which was exactly the opposite of what I was feeling right now.

"Yes," she whispered, her eyes suddenly catching on fire, that sexy smirk returning to her lips.

I smiled in response, and grabbed her hand, leading her through the club toward the exit. I could feel the sparks igniting between our entertwined fingers., and it felt amazing.

-----

Before I knew it, we were standing outside the door to my flat as I fumbled with my keys to try and get the damn thing open. She was behind me with her arms around my waist, pressing me into the door and making it even more difficult for me to get it open. One of her hands reached up and cupped my breasts as she leaned forward more and began sucking on my neck. I let out as small cry and I felt her grinding against my arse. I finally got the door open and we stumbled forward. She spun me around and kissed me hard, confidently pushing me all the way through my flat as if it was her own. She guided me to my bedroom, throwing me onto the bed once we got inside.

She pulled her own shirt off and pounced on top of me, kissing me hungrily. Her breathing was so ragged and her movements were so fierce, I could hardly believe that I had made her this turned on. She broke our kiss and ripped most of my clothes off in one lightening fast motion, leaving me in nothing but my bra and knickers. She kissed her way back up my body, paying particular attention to my stomach. My mind was almost completely clouded over in the haze of lust that surrounded us, but as she reached my lips and kissed me once again I suddenly remembered the real reason I had went after her again in the first place.

"Wait," I whispered into her lips, causing her to pull back sharply.

"What?" she asked, still panting and shaking above me, "I thought you wanted this." I looked deeply in her eyes, and there it was again. That sweetness, that tender vulnerability I was longing to know more about. She looked so taken aback I just wanted to pull her back to me and kiss her pained expression away.

"No, I mean, of course I want this," I whispered back, propping myself up on my elbows so I could look her in the eyes as she continued to straddle me.

"You're so irresistable," I continued, my breathing still extremely heavy, "but I want to know more about you than just how to make you scream. And if I'm going to continue being honest… you just… you fucking fascinate me."

Her mouth hung open in shock, and I expected her to jump off of me and dash out of the room at any second. But she didn't. She just sat there looking at me as if she was trying to figure something out. I sat up completely, resting my hands on her thighs as she continued to look at me like I was a complicated math problem.

"I don't understand…" she finally replied, breaking our eye contact and dropping her eyelashes.

"What do you mean?" I asked, trying to catch her eye again so that I could at least attempt to read what she was feeling.

"It's just... no one has ever said anything like that to me before… no one has ever wanted to know anything about me."

As the words escaped her lips, I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces. I felt myself begin to understand that I probably couldn't fathom the things that this small girl has been through in her life. The entire fabric of my being was longing to hold her as she continued to avoid meeting my eyes, instead nervously playing with one of my bra straps. The feeling overwhelmed me, and suddenly, I knew I had to let her know that I cared. I reached out and brushed her hair out of her eyes, allowing my fingers to trail down to her chin, lifting it gently.

She was controlling herself well, because when our eyes met her expression was once again unreadable.

"I can't imagine why not," I whispered softly, "you're wonderful."

With that, the walls that she was barely managing to hold up had crumbled, and her eyes shone with adoration as they bore into mine. I leaned forward and kissed her gently, trying to put as many of the emotions I was feeling for her at the moment into that single kiss. She responded, running her tongue along my bottom lip seeking entrance, which I of course gave to her without hesitation. But this kiss was different than all of the other ones we had shared. It wasn't urgent or frantic or brought on by lust, it was simply passion in it's purest form. I was surprised when I tasted the saltiness of tears on her lips, and then I heard her choke back a sob.

I pulled her back onto the bed, wrapping her in an embrace as she began to cry softly. I kissed her all over, her shoulders, her eyes, her cheeks, her lips, and continued to cradle her body so she would know how much I cared. So she would know how much I wanted her.

I didn't know why she was crying, but it didn't matter because at that moment I knew that I would spend the rest of my life trying to make sure this beautiful woman next to me never cried again.


	5. Time To Pretend

**Hey guys, miss me?**

* * *

For the third time in less than twice as many days, I found myself standing outside of Tony's Gentleman's Club. This time was different than the others though. How you ask? Well, for starters, I was alone and scared fucking shitless. And secondly, it was only half four in the afternoon, which admittedly made me a feel a little pathetic. But I was here for a fucking reason, so it was justifiable.

When I had woken up this morning, I wasn't surprised to find myself alone. Yet, I still felt a familiar pang of sadness as my eyes adjusted to the light and I realized my redheaded mystery lover had left me alone in my bed. The previous night had been a total blur of passion and unexpected emotions, and as they all came flooding back to me I had begun to feel overwhelmed. I didn't understand where it all had come from; I didn't understand her. But I knew I wanted to more than anything, and even that I couldn't understand. I mean we had fucked twice and never even had a proper conversation, what kind of basis was that for a meaningful relationship? She had cried in my arms, and I still didn't even know her shitting name.

Pretty fucked up situation, if you ask me.

Nonetheless, I knew I was fucked. There was just something about her, something I couldn't put my finger on. There were times in our encounters when she had looked at me and suddenly I had felt so sure that I was with someone special, someone so mind numbingly wonderful that it shook me to my very core. It made no logical sense, I knew I had no basis for these feelings, but somehow I just knew.

So I had dragged myself out of bed, determined to track down the redhead and have a proper conversation with her, to figure out what it was that made me so drawn to her. Well, whatever made me drawn to her besides the fact that she was the most attractive women in the whole fucking world.

I was nervous as I stepped through those doors; this world looked so much different in the light of day. There were no waitresses bringing endless rounds of drinks to crowds of excited bachelors being fawned over by gorgeous women. There was only one women dancing on stage, and she was hardly attractive, but I supposed that's what you get on a Sunday afternoon. I looked around and noticed there were just a few patrons in the bar at this hour, and I cringed at the thought that I looked like one of them. The four or five men present weren't paying any attention to the stripper on the stage. They were all sat in different corners of the bar, each looking unkempt and as if they hadn't slept in weeks. They were all wearing similar looks of anticipation and I laughed as I realized that they were probably those pathetic men that fell in love with strippers. Seriously, how pathetic is it to fall for someone who is probably only giving you attention so you'll keep coming there and paying for drinks and dances?

I continued my journey through the club, trying to keep my head down so I wouldn't have to make awkward eye contact with anyone. I hadn't spotted the familiar shade of red I was looking for yet, and I wasn't even sure I would. It was kind of stupid to assume she would be working on a Sunday afternoon, but I suppose it was the only place I could think of to try and find her. And after last night, I had to find her.

I was snapped from my thoughts when I noticed a familiar figure enter the room from one of the back doors. It was that brunette that had been fucking around with Cook. She smirked as she saw me, looking as though she wasn't at all fucking surprised to see me there. It was infuriating. She began walking towards me and I was surprised by how modestly she was dressed in a pair of loose jeans and a t shirt.

"Fancy seeing you here," she breathed in an almost mocking tone. I raised my eyebrow at her, but decided against spitting out one of the numerous bitchy comebacks currently swirling in my mind.

"Where's your friend?" she added before I could say anything I would regret.

"I could ask you the same question," I responded quickly.

She just shook her head and smiled mysteriously, nodding towards the door she had just come through. I looked towards the partially opened door and was suddenly aware of the voices floating into the room from the other side of it. I turned back to face the brunette again and I was shocked to find she had disappeared. Jesus, what was with the girls in here being so fucking mysterious?

I headed towards the door tentatively, unsure of how to proceed. I stopped dead in my tracks as I heard the familiar husky voice of the redhead arguing with a man.

"Jesus Red, how could you be so fucking irresponsible?"

I clenched my jaw unconsciously as I heard the anger in his voice, leaning lightly against the wall beside the door so I could hear a little better.

"Fuck off Tony," I heard her retort dismissively.

"Don't tell me to fucking fuck off Red, do even realize what you're doing? How could you let that happen, you know the fucking rules. I should have known you weren't ready for this."

"Jesus Tony, I messed up once, it's my first time you think you could cut me a little slack! It's not my fault you practically forced me into this."

"You know how it works here Red. I let you pussyfoot around here for the last fucking five years! Now it's time you give me something back."

"I just… I don't know if I can do it Tony," she responded, her voice sounding small and broken.

"Well that's too fucking bad now isn't it? You started it, and you're going to bloody well finish it. You know the fucking rules, and you can't follow them you can get the fuck out of here. You and your slut of a sister."

I felt shock, anger and confusion coursing through me all at once, what had this girl gotten herself into here? I perked my ears up and leaned closer to the door, trying to catch more of the conversation. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I felt a hand curl around my shoulder.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

It was the waitress that had served Cook and I last night, and she looked fucking pissed. My mouth dropped in shock as I saw her in the natural light and realized why she had looked so familiar. Her face was a little rounder, and her hair was darker. Her eyes were less kind, and her button nose wasn't nearly as cute. Her voice was higher and whinier, and she looked like she fucking wanted to kill me, but I'll be damned if I wasn't staring at a carbon copy of the redheaded stripper that had been invading my thoughts for the past five days.

I began stuttering out some kind of plausible explanation, but I was cut short as the bitchy waitresses dragged me away from the door and over to a nearby table.

"Why are you here?" she asked, eyeing me curiously.

"I..I… I don't know why I'm here," I whispered after a few moments.

"Well you better fucking figure it out."

I looked up at her, and was surprised to find a smile on her face to accompany her harsh words. She winked at me and headed back towards the bar, leaving me more confused than ever if that were even possible. Seriously, what was up with these girls?

I didn't have time to dwell on the thought because less than a moment later, I saw the flash red I had been waiting for. I spun around as she slipped into the room looking flushed and exasperated. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as I reflected on the conversation I had just overheard. What kind of trouble was this girl into?

She spotted me and suddenly looked like a deer caught in headlights. I slowly got to my feet as she continued to stare at me with her mouth hanging open. She averted her eyes from my gaze and dropped them to the floor. She looked like she was having a fucking argument with herself. I raised an eyebrow as she seemed to come to a decision, nodding her head slightly and moving towards me.

"Can we go somewhere?" she asked immediately as she reached me.

"Where?" I asked, slightly shocked at the sudden question.

"Anywhere."

I was unsure what to do in that moment. I had so many questions, and I had certainly never felt more confused. But through my clouded mind the only thing I did know, was that I would follow this girl anywhere.

I grabbed her hand, shivering as I interlaced our fingers, and pulled her out of the club.

* * *

**The plot thickens...**

**Okay, so a few things.**

**I know this is kind of short, and well... a bit shit, but I really wanted to get something up for you guys and to get back into writing this. I have been insanely busy with university and other crap, so I really haven't had time for this story recently. But I have every intention of keeping up writing it, hopefully a little more regularly now as I have a break between papers and exams. So I hope all you lovely people can forgive me and give me pretty reviews :). You know I appreciate them so much!**

**Also, since this is the first time I have posted since Skins ended... the last episode was a beautiful ending for them, they totally deserved it after all they had been through. Yay for endgame!**

**I hope you're all still liking this, let me know what you think?**


	6. Feel It In My Bones

**Hello again. I got this one to you guys semi-fast I think. I've been sooooooo busy lately, but this story is important to me, so I promise I will get updates up as regularly as I can.**

**I want to thank everyone once again for the reviews, I really appreciate each and every one of them. Although I really don't have time individually respond, I read them all and I love each of you for them. So keep them coming!**

**This one is a little short once again, but I have a feeling you'll all like it. :)**

**this-is-not-allowed... this is the one I promised you. I hope I don't disappoint.**

* * *

We drove through the countryside in silence. She had taken my hand into her lap and was tracing delicate patterns over the back of it. It was all I could do to control myself enough to concentrate on the road ahead and not jump her right then and there. Of course the fact that she insisted on touching me so much and that her presence in general sent my heart into overddrive made an extremely easy task. I chanced a glance over at the redhead and quickly noticed that she seemed lost in thought. Feel it in my bones by Tegan and Sara was floating softly through the radio, and she reached forward to turn it up. The bass was thumping in time with my own heartbeat, and I thought about how much this song reflected how I felt about her. I never saw her coming.

Yet here she was, as real as anything I've ever experienced. From the moment I had met her, she had assaulted every one of my senses, bringing me places I'd never thought I'd go. She looked so lost, and I knew I couldn't possibly understand what was happening in her life right now. I barely knew her not fucks sakes. So instead of using words as comfort, I squeezed her hand slightly and gave her a reassuring smile when she looked over at me. She squeezed back with one hand, and with the other reached out to touch my thigh. I shuddered at the contact, jesus was she trying to get us killed? I quickly brought my eyes back to the road to make sure I didn't lose myself in the moment, the effect she could have on me was unbelievable. I wanted to talk. I wanted to ask her some of the millions of questions swirling around in my head right now. But I couldn't bring myself to break the equilibrium we had set ourselves into. Not yet anyway.

I pulled off and parked on the side of the road after a few more moments. I turned to look at my redheaded companion and found that she still looked very distracted, almost as if she was lost in her own little world. I decided I would give her a few more moments before I attempted to coax any information out of her, so I stepped out of the vehicle in the cool evening air. The sun was barely hanging over the horizon, creating a red shadow that cascaded down into the rolling hills below. The air was crisp in that way that only occurs during that brief period between night and day. Suddenly I was lost in my surroundings, drinking in the atmosphere of one of my favorite places on earth.

The slamming of the car door snapped me out of my reverie, and I spun around to come face to face with an amused looking redhead. She slowly walked towards me, watching me with curiosity dancing in her eyes, and grabbed my hand, interlacing our fingers. I smiled broadly, feeling the chills running up and down my spine at the simple touch. Man, this girl was something else. I began pulling her towards the pathway, anxious to make it to our destination before sunset.

We walked hand in hand, still drowning in the silence that had fallen upon us since we left the club. I was almost afraid that words would break the spell that was surrounding us, and I had a strange feeling that she felt the same way. Our footsteps crashed together in a steady rhythm, keeping the silence from being a burden; it was almost comfortable.

When we finally reached the spot, I had the same reaction I did every time I went there. I took a sharp intake of breath as a content smile fell over my face. My eyes surveyed the small lake, taking in how the trees cascade around it giving it an almost lagoon like feel. I had been coming to this place since I was little girl, and in a lot of ways, it had become sort of my sanctuary. It was my place to think, my place to get away from everything when things got to be too much. There were times in my life where I would spend days at a time here, just thinking. In fact, once during a particularly nasty break up, I had spent an entire week camping out here. It was beautiful. It was peaceful.

I stole a quick glance from the redhead next to me, smiling happily after noticing she too seemed to be in awe of my place. I allowed my eyes to linger on her body after a moment, appreciating every excruciatingly perfect curve. She was dressed modestly, a pair of loose jeans and a faded green jumper. But to me, she had never looked sexier. It didn't take her long to realize I was staring, and she returned my gaze with amusement dancing in her breathtaking brown eyes. She pulled me toward her with our still interlocked hand and kissed me softly.

"Thank you for bringing me here," I felt her whisper against my lips as she pulled away.

"My pleasure," I responded. She bit her lip and shook her head slightly; I assume she was repressing a lewd sexual remark. I appreciated her adorable attempt to preserve the atmosphere.

"It's lovely, it's a lovely place."

I pulled her towards the edge of the water and we sat down carefully. She leaned into me almost immediately and I instinctively wrapped a protective arm around her waist. I could feel her smile against my shoulder as her arms slipped around my hips as well. We sat silently for a long while, simply enjoying each others' presence. It was easy and comfortable, and everything about it just elt so unbelievably right. But after a while, I could feel the questions burning in the back of my throat, and I knew I couldn't hold them in any longer.

"So," I started, clearing my throat awkwardly, "I was thinking since we, um well… you know… that I could maybe… well that is… maybe you'd want to get to know each other better You know, maybe talk?."

Smooth Naomi, fucking smooth.

"What do you want to know," she asked, giving nothing away with her tone of voice.

"I don't know. Some simple stuff perhaps? Like, where did you grow up?"

"London," she answered absently.

"How old are you?"

"Twenty-four."

"Do you like your job?"

"It's okay…"

"Do you have any siblings?"

"A brother and sister."

"Favorite movie?"

"Eternal sunshine."

"What's your name?"

"Naomi," she said suddenly pulling away and stopping my rapid fire sseries of questions that I realized had probably sounded quite similar to a military interegation.

"I'm sorry," I responded sheepishly, ducking my head in embarrassment.

"It's fine, it's just... why does it matter?" she asked, pulling herself completely away from me and getting to her feet. She took a few steps, turning her back to me and facing out towards the lake. It was completely dark now, and I could barely see her dimly glowing in the moonlight. I pushed myself off the ground and moved toward her, reaching out to touch her but stopping at the last second. Even in the tense situation we were currently in, I could feel the electricity between us as my hand fell just out of reach of her shoulder.

"I just want to know you."

She turned to face me, and even in the dark I could see her brown eyes shining back at me, full of the shy vulnerability that I was so unbelievably anxious to discover more about.

"Why?"

This time I stepped toward her, but I didn't hesitate to reach out and brush her hair out of her eyes. I let my hand rest on either side of her face, and I felt her shiver as she leaned into the touch.

"Because," I started, struggling slightly, "because I can't get you out of my head. I don't know why, and believe me I've tried to fucking figure it out. You're just so… flawless."

I moved my hands down her arms, gripping her waist as I felt her starting to laugh at me slightly.

"You're not looking hard enough," she whispered, dropping her eyes as I pulled her closer.

"I want to know you," I whispered, our mouths within inches of each other. I could feel her hot breath on my mouth as she stared at my lips, licking her own in anticipation.

"Maybe I want to know you too," she responded softly, bring her hand up to brush her thumb over my quivering bottom lip.

"Well, I'm Naomi Campbell, twenty-eight years old, Bristol born and bred. I'm an editor for a bullshit publishing company, and I hate every minute of it. And I think, that you are amazing."

She pulled back slightly, looking almost surprised at my words, before her lips broke into a broad grin. She leaned back in, and we were both overtaken by the moment. Our lips crashed together in a fury of passion and urgency. I felt her tongue enter my mouth, swirling with my own in a dance of desire.

It was almost like she was kissing me for the first time.

I pulled away after a few moments to catch my breath. Our foreheads were pressed together and she was breathing heavily and stroking her fingers along my jaw line. I looked her directly in the eyes, staring deeply into the soul of the woman I was rapidly falling for and I knew I had to ask again.

"Tell me your name," I whispered, almost too softly for her to hear.

She looked conflicted for a moment, as if she was unsure how to proceed. But before I knew what was happening, she was kissing me again. She kissed me with such abandon that I wasn't sure she was ever going to stop.

Within a few seconds she pulled away and I felt her whisper something against my lips that nearly made my heart stop.

"Emily. My name is Emily."


	7. You've Got The Love

I woke the next morning with a huge smile on face. It was the first time in the last five or so days that I knew exactly where I was, exactly what I had done the night before, and I actually felt happy about it. I had flown though an impressive array of emotions in the last few days, and there were a few choice words that could connect them all. Red, passion, desire, and now most importantly, Emily. My chest swelled and I felt my already face splitting grin grow even wider as I allowed the redheads name to float through my brain once again. Of all of the names she could have possibly had that started with the letter E, I hadn't thought of Emily. It suited her; it definitely suited her, it was unbelievably beautiful. Oh fuck, did I really just think that? Jesus, I'm turning into a soppy git aren't I?

But it was true, no matter how much I wanted to deny it. The redhead, Emily, had completely captivated me. We had spent the last night staring at the stars, just talking and laughing with each other until we both knew we couldn't stay there any longer without falling asleep. She let her guard down with me, at least a little bit, and what I saw inside was exactly what I expected. She was smart, and sweet, and funny, and pretty much everything I ever thought I wanted. How this wonderful women could possibly end up in the profession that she had was beyond me. But with the confident, sexy façade I knew she could put on, she was certainly damn good at it.

I had wanted to ask her more about it, but I figured I had pushed the envelope enough for one night. We didn't talk about much of substance after that; we just joked around and talked about mundane things. But I felt like I got a brief glimpse into the inner pools of the women I wanted to know so badly, and I was mesmerized by what I saw.

I glanced over at the clock, quickly discovering it was just after 6am. I stretched lightly, knowing I had at least three more hours before I had to be to work, but I dragged myself out of bed anyway. I threw on a pair of faded jeans and a baggy jumper, and grabbing my keys and a pair of sunglasses I headed towards the door. I wanted to think, and I when I wanted to think I drove. I headed towards my old firebird convertible jumped in the drivers seat. As soon as the engine had revved up, I let the top down and speeded off towards the countryside. The Arkells were blasting through my cd player, and I smiled at how my music always seemed to know exactly what I was in the mood to listen to.

_It was a bad idea_

_To give me this kind of time._

I smile as the wind whipped through my hair and my head bobbed along to the music. I really felt spectacular. Things weren't perfect, things were hardly even clear at this point, but I still felt fucking awesome. My thoughts drifted back to Emily once again, and my smile grew even wider. Our evening together had been so perfect. We hadn't had sex; last night wasn't about that. We just spent the evening laying together, kissing, touching, and simply existing. When our laughter and playful chatter had finally died down, we just lay there together, staring into each other's eyes and holding each other. She had looked at me with such unveiled adoration, I felt like I was the only person in the world. I could hardly believe that just a week ago, this girl hadn't been in my life. Now here she was, gripping onto my heart almost as if she had always been there.

The song changed, and immediately my mood did as well. Promises by The Morning Benders floated through my stereo, and in that moment I realized how insecure I should be feeling. I was completely head over heel for this girl; Naomi fucking Campbell did not fall head over heels for anyone. And, not only did this girl have a death grip hold on my heart, but I barely knew a fucking thing about her. We had sex twice, and almost a third time before I even knew her name, what does that say about a person? What does that say about me?

I knew in the moments we had spent together last night that this girl was someone I would pretty much die to get to know better, but that didn't mean she felt the same way. I mean, okay, obviously she was attracted to me but there was something else going on in her mind last night. She always looked so conflicted, no matter how hard she tried to hide it. In various points throughout the evening, she had gone through a large amount of emotions, but no matter how positive or negative they were, they always seemed conflicted.

I sighed to myself, there were too many emotions flying around this for it to be something casual. I knew I had to talk to her, like really talk to her and find out what all this was about. I still had so many questions, and I was driving myself crazy by not knowing them. I think I was driving myself crazy anyway with the absurdity of this whole situation, I mean I've barely known this girl a fucking week and I'm beyond infatuated with her. But the thing was, no matter how much I dissected it and obsessed over it, I always came to the same conclusion; she seemed to feel the same way about me.

I drove around for about another hour just losing myself in my thoughts, allowing myself to go through everything logically and come up with a plan. In the end, I decided I would give myself and Emily some space. As much as my entire body seemed to tell me I couldn't bare to be away from the redhead, I knew it was the best call. That way I could get my feelings under control long enough for us to have a proper conversation, and hopefully it would give her enough time to sort out her own feelings as well. You know when you get that feeling that you've come acrss someone who's supposed to matter in your life? Well, I felt that way about Emily, and I really didn't want to do anything to screw it up.

I pulled my car back into the garage outside my house, and as I shut off the engine I allowed my head to lean forward into the steering wheel. The cd that I had in the player had restarted itself, and Promises was playing once again.

_I can't help thinking we grew up too fast_

_And I know, I know this won't last_

_A second longer than it has._

I snapped myself out of my daze and jumped out of the car. This was going to be a long fucking day.

* * *

Work had been uneventful, unsuprisingly. I hated my fucking job so much. I missed the days when I used to be a travel journalist; Cook and I pretty much spent our first six years out of College running around the globe and doing whatever the fuck (or whoever) we wanted. It hadn't paid well, but it kept us going. Now here I was, a big fucking corporate sell out editing for some bullshit conglomerate company, and I hated every minute of it. But it was what we had wanted, what we decided on. Cook had settled down into a boring construction job, and I settled into this one, it was all part of the plan. And even though I hated it, I had been content. After all it was what real people did; real people had boring jobs, boring relationships, and boring lives. And after everything Cook and I had been through, being boring was something we agreed we needed.

That is, until a whir of red and brown disrupted everything and turned my whole world upside down.

I threw myself onto my couch as the redhead invaded my thoughts once again. Why did everything have to be so fucking complicated? This wasn't how real life was supposed to be. It wasn't about passion, excitement, and beautiful redheaded strippers named Emily. Real life was about routine, comprimise, and boring brunette lawyers named Tay. Jesus Christ, why was I letting this happen to me again?

I shook myself out my battle with myself and jumped up off the couch. I needed to stop obsessing over things and just let them happen. I knew I was terrified of feeling out of control again, but I just had to hope I could handle whatever was going to come out of this.

Resolved to have a quiet evening cleaning the apartment, I walked over to my ipod dock and switched it on. You've Got The Love, by Florence + the Machine quickly filled the room and I began to sing along as I started the dishes.

I was startled out of my performace when I heard a loud knock at my door. I stumbled backwards in fright, stubbing my toe against the counter. I caught myself on the chair to keep from falling over and swore loudly.

"Just a minute," I shouted at the door, hoping whoever was on the other side wouldn't think I was trying to kill someone in here.

I threw off my rubber gloves and rushed over to the door. I swung it open and was surprised to find no one there. Jesus, I guess they really were impatient. As I turned to go back inside I noticed that there was a small envelope stuck to the handle. I picked it up, examining it carefully, and quickly noticed that _Naomi _was written across it in bright red letters. I closed the door behind me and opened it hastily. Inside was a piece of white paper with a short typed message on it. My heart was beating out of my chest and I felt my hands begin to shake as my eyes traced over the letters again and again.

_She's hiding something, be careful._

"Jesus," I swore to no one in particular. I leaned heavily against the door, my emotions running so wild I couldn't pinpoint a single one that was dominating. The short letter could mean so many things, but I knew immediately who it was referring to. What was Emily hiding? I mean, she was hiding a lot of things since I barely knew anything about her, and I was especially concerned about that angry conversation she had, had with that man Tony. But it never occurred to me that it could be anything dangerous enough for someone to warn me about her.

I didn't have much time to think about it, because within in minutes I was once again startled by a knock on my door. This one was quieter, but it scared the shit out of me nonetheless. I turned around and stared at the door as if it were a slimy green alien. My hand was shaking like crazy as I reached for the latch to pull it open, terrified of facing what might be on the otherside.

I pulled the door open, and was surprised to come face to face with the brown eyes of the woman I had just been thinking about. I opened my mouth to speak but I was quickly silenced by the look on her face. She looked so nervous, I had never seen her like that before. And she looked upset, really fucking upset. Like, not like she'd been crying, but like she was pretty fucking close to doing so.

"Emily," I finally managed to sputter out after a few moments.

"Hi," she responded in that husky voice that never failed to make my hairs stand on end. As I looked at her, I was startled to realize the confident, sexy creature I had been introduced to a few days earlier was gone, and here before me was her inner core. I was still concerned over the note, but in that moment I just wanted to reach out to her and give her all I had to make her feel better. Whatever she was hiding, I just had to trust her because I wasn't going to be able to control how I was feeling about her.

"I just…I," she began, struggling to find her words. She shook her head, giving up, and instead lunged forward, capturing my lips in a heated kiss and making all my remaining concerns fly out my head.

"I had to see you," she whispered against my lips in between kisses as she pushed me back into my apartment.

So much for spending time away from her.

* * *

Ooh, more mystery, what's going to happen! Sorry I'm so slow at updating this, I'm a very busy lady these days. But the updates will come! You just have to be patient.

Sometime in the near future, I plan on releasing a little soundtrack to his story, a la LuvActually (shameless plug, if you've not reading Coin Laundry, you damn well should be). Because that was awesome, and because music is my main inspiration for this story and I think the lot of you would get it more if you heard all of the songs that have essentially written this story.

Well that's it for now. Thanks again for the reviews, got any more? :)


	8. Mass Romantic

**Hello again, all. I'm back with yet another update, and this will probably be the last one until next Sunday, save some sort of miracle that is. I know, I know, that seems like such a long time, but after that I am officially finished with university for the summer, and that means regular updates! Especially since I have a whole month before I start work, and I plan on finishing this story within that time period. I already have another idea kicking around in my head for my second story, so we'll see how that goes. **

**Thanks again as usual for all the reviews, you're all so lovely. I'm interested to know what you'll all think after this one, hopefully a few people will have a few theories they'd like to share? :) I'm sorry to leave this one here, but hey, I'm evil like that. :)**

**See you all soon.**

**-fg**

* * *

Emily pushed me back through my apartment, kicking the door shut behind her as we got inside. Her kisses were rushed and desperate as she pushed me back onto my couch. As soon as I landed, she immediately jumped on top of me, straddling my hips as she continued to kiss me thoroughly, our tongues dancing hastily against each other. Her fingers were tangled in my hair as she continued to pull me closer, her hips slowly beginning to gyrate against me. Somewhere in my lust filled haze, my brain was screaming at me that there was something I was forgetting. I tried to sort out any thoughts I had besides "fuck she's hot," "god she tastes so good," and "jesus she's turning me on." Apparently my brain didn't operate so well when there was a beautiful redhead on top of me kissing me like we hadn't seen each other in three months. But then again, whose brain could operate with that much stimulation?

I finally managed to pull my thoughts together enough to determine that I had to pull away and ask her what was wrong. Just a few more seconds, and I'd pull away. She was kissing me so hard, and her hands were beginning to trail down my body, leaving a trail of fire on my skin. I almost forgot once again that I was supposed to pull away, but eventually I grabbed her hips and pushed myself back. I looked up at her and she gave me a smouldering gaze. Gone was the woman who had looked so vulnerable just moments ago, and this women on top of me now was wearing a look that said "I'm going to fucking make you scream." The fact that she could switch back and forth from these personas alarmed me slightly.

"Emily, talk to me, tell me what's wrong," I whispered, finally breaking the electricity filled silence between us.

"Later," she replied simply, giving me a sexy smirk and leaning forward to bite my bottom lip, "I need you to fuck me, right now."

Lust clouded my mind and once again I completely forgot why I wanted to stop this in the first place. I leaned forward, crashing our lips together forcefully and she gasped into my mouth as she began digging her fingernails into my shoulder blades. I hastily pushed her cardigan off of her shoulders and broke our kiss to pull her vest over her head. Christ she was so fucking hot. Once her top was off, she practically growled as she captured my lips in another heated kiss. I reached down and grabbed at her tight arse, using all of my strength to lift her up off the sofa. Jesus, I guess all those hours I had been spending at the gym recently were paying off. Not that she was big, of course, just that I knew I was never really that strong.

She squealed slightly in surprise but quickly wrapped her legs around me tightly and kissed me even harder. I smirked slightly as I realized my display of strength was turning her on even more. I carried her into my bedroom, slamming her up against the door as we got inside. I pulled away from her lips, causing her to whimper at the missed contact, but I quickly attacked her neck instead. I sucked and bit her pulse point and I could feel her tighten her legs around my waist once again. I began to grind my hips against her centre, and she cried out in pleasure before pulling my lips back to hers for another heated kiss.

I loosened my grip on her arse, slowly letting her drop to the ground as my strength began to fail me. Once her feet touched the ground she took control, grabbing my top and yanking it over my head. Her eyes blazed with desire as she unsnapped my bra and let it fall to the ground. She shoved me hard back onto the bed and leaped on top of me. As she dipped her head to kiss my neck again, I was already seeing stars.

* * *

Emily collapsed next to me, both of us still panting with sweat coating every inch of our bodies. My heart was beating out of my chest as I felt her lace ours fingers together and bring them up to her lips, kissing each of my knuckles softly.

"Thanks for that," she whispered with a sheepish tone to her voice. I smiled in spite of myself, fuck me this girl could switch personas so bloody fast. One second she was this incredibly sexy and confident sex hound, and the next she was adorable, vulnerable, and unbelievably sweet. I felt slightly frustrated, I couldn't fucking figure her out. I glanced over at, noticing quickly that she was studying my expression intently. She surprised me by leaning forward and softly kissing me on the cheek, letting her nose brush softly over my skin as she pulled away. Fuck, there she was being all sweet again.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked finally, obviously unable to hold the question in her any longer.

"You," I replied without even thinking about it. So what if it sounded sappy, it was the fucking truth wasn't it?

She smiled in response and turned on her side, nuzzling into my neck and reaching forward the stroke my jaw tenderly.

"What about me?"

"I, I just..." I struggled with my words, finally taking a deep breath and blurting out what was on my mind, "I don't get you."

I felt her stiffen slightly, but she continued to stroke my jaw nonetheless.

"What don't you get?"

Fuck it, might as well lay all my cards on the table.

"It's just, one minute you're this fiery sex kitten," I felt her chuckle slightly at my choice of words, but I continued anyway, "and the next you're this completely adorable, sweetheart. It's like you're two different people."

She propped herself up so we were face to face, and she quirked an eyebrow at me. "Haven't you ever met a complicated girl, Naomi?"

"Of course I have! I just, well I really like you actually, and I guess I just want to make sure this isn't just a game or one off to you," I responded, averting my eyes in embarrassment.

I felt her finger lift my chin so our eyes could meet once again, and in her brown orbs I could see that unveiled adoration that she's allowed me to see just a few times before. She leaned forward and kissed me softly, lingering against my lips slightly as we both shuddered at the contact.

"I really like you too, Naomi," she whispered against my lips.

I smiled widely and leaned forward to capture her lips once again. I pulled back and she smiled shyly at me.

"So, you think I'm adorable then?"

I blushed brightly before answering.

"Well, you are."

"You're very sweet you know," she responded with a grin, tapping my nose with the tip of her finger.

"Yeah well, you seem to inspire it in me."

"And adorable."

"Well for that I can only give myself credit, and possibly my mother."

"Hmm, I bet she's a fit one then," Emily said with a cheeky grin.

"Oi, that's my mum you're talking about there you dirty cow," I squeaked back at her, slapping her arm lightly with the back of my hand. She giggled slightly and snuggled into me, wrapping her arm around my waist and sighing contently.

"So, what was wrong with you earlier?" I asked, unable to keep the question from slipping out. I felt her freeze, and she was quiet for a few long moments as if she was unsure of what to say.

"I don't really want to talk about it," she finally responded. I nodded slightly, disappointed that she was unwilling to share with me, but I accepted it nonetheless.

"Okay," I answered trying not to let my disappointment seep into my tone of voice. "But I'll be here when you do."

* * *

For the next few weeks, I fell into a steady routine. Well, I suppose routine might be a poor word to use, because routine implies predictability. The only thing about those weeks that had been predictable was that I would wake up, go to work, come home and Emily would show up outside my door at some point during the evening, but other than that I never knew what was going to happen. Some nights we stayed in, just talking and fucking each other's brains out, but other nights she took me out. Whether it was dinner in a grubby pub and making out in one of the corner booths, or dancing in a crowded bar, our bodies practically melding together as we swayed to the music, I was quickly learning that everything I did was better when I did it with Emily. I loved the way she would hold my hand and lean into my shoulder as we walked through the streets of Bristol together, or how she would squeal and cuddle into my shoulder when we watched a horror film. I loved the way she would bite her lip when she was turned on and the noises she would make whenever I brought her to the edge of ecstasy. I loved her laugh, I loved her smile, I loved her smell, I think I fucking loved everything about her. This girl was really something, and I really fucking liked her.

I had pretty much forgotten the fact that I was dating a stripper, it somehow seemed irrelevant. I had never seen her dance, and whenever I would stop by the club she was always either working behind the bar or immediately ready to leave with me. I didn't ask her questions about it either; I figured it was better if I didn't know. Plus, if that club had facilitated the development of her sexy little persona, I guess I could only thank them for bringing me the immense enjoyment that it had.

I got off work on a Wednesday evening, three weeks after we had met. I knew Emily was going to come over later, so I had decided I would cook her a nice romantic dinner. I know, I know, I've turned into a fucking soppy tit made of candy floss, but I can't help it. I really, really liked this girl.

On my way home I stopped off at the shop to get some ingredients to make chicken parmesan and a nice bottle of Pinot Grigio. The cashier smiled at me as a made my purchases.

"Must be a special lad to get this kind of treatment," he said with a glint in his eye.

"Yeah, something like that," I responded with a smile of my own. I quickly gathered up my things and left the shop, almost giddy at the excitement of having a romantic dinner with my "special lad."

I arrived home a few moments later, tossing my keys on the table by my door as I shut it behind me. I brought my purchases into the kitchen and laid them on the table. I glanced over at my answering machine and noticed it was blinking. I flicked one of my small lamps on in the living room as I walked over and pressed the flashing red button on the machine. The automated voice informed me I had two new messages.

"_Hey Naomi,"_

My eyes lit up as I heard my favourite redhead's voice floating through the phone.

"_Just calling to let you know I might be a little late tonight, Tony's being a fucking bastard and wants me to stay back for some team meeting or something. Anyway, I'll be by later, wait up for me! Actually... on second thought don't. I can think of some fun ways to wake you when I get there. See you soon babe_."

I smiled widely, she was so fucking cute. In my blissful, Emily filled haze, I almost forgot there was another messaged until a crude, unfamiliar voice cut its way through the room.

"_You need to stop this now, you can't trust her. It's not too late to save yourself Naomi. Think about what you know, what you don't know. You'll understand."_

The message clicked out, and I felt my entire body shaking. I lowered myself onto the couch, trying to fight off tears as an overwhelming fear consumed me. What the fuck was going on?

Another fucking message.

The last few weeks had been so wonderful I had all but forgotten about the mysterious letter that had been posted on my door. But now the memory of it was flooding back to me, and I began to tremble. I wasn't sure what I was more scared of at the moment. This unknown person clearly knew a lot about me and my life, they had been to my fucking apartment and they had my phone number. There was no doubt that that was fucking scary. But there was something more scary about the messages, and I don't think I was ready to face it.

I practically jumped out of my skin as I heard the door click open. I didn't move, I was completely quiet as I heard a voice flood through the room.

"Naoms, sorry I'm early," I heard Emily's sweet voice, and I relaxed a little, but it scared me how little. "Turns out Tony had to go out of town and..." she cut off her sentence as she looked at the state of me. I must have looked like a shaking mess because her eyes immediately filled with shock and concern. She rushed over to me and wrapped her arms around me, pulling me into a tight embrace. I felt myself trembling as I reached out to hug her back.

"Naomi, what happened?" she asked with her lips next to my ear. She pulled back to look at me, and brushed a stray piece of my blonde tresses out of my eyes so she could see me properly. I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out. She nodded and leaned forward, gently brushing her lips over mine in a comforting gesture. I buried my head in the crook of her neck, breathing in her scent and trying to make my fears subside, but they didn't.

And all of sudden, the one person who made me feel safe, terrified me as well.


	9. Laser Beams

**Hello again everyone. **

**So it's like, 4am, and I'm updating this so I hope you all appreciate it :)**

**First of all, I'm terribly, terribly sorry that I left this for so long. I have been so unbelievably busy, as per usual, but I assure you that I'm back now and I have every intention of finishing this story. It seems as though alot of Naomily writers have been on hiatus recently, so again, very sorry that I was one of them. Second of all, sorry if the writing is a bit mechanical on this one, I've written way more papers in the last few weeks than any human should ever be subject to. Thirdly, thanks as always for all the reviews, favorites, and alerts, and even just for reading. I appreciate every single one, and it was really interesting to read what some people think is going to happen. Oh how wrong you all are :).**

**Starting to get a bit into the angst portion of this story here, just a warning.**

**Oh, and also, the two songs I mention in this chapter are worth a listen in terms of the atmosphere and overall mood of the scenes in this chapter. They really helped me write this, and plus they are awesome songs. A Cold Night Close To The End by Said The Whale and Laser Beams by Wintersleep, check it out.**

**This one goes out to this_is_not_allowed, for being impatient haha. And also, to HyperFitched, who picked up on a bunch of things last chapter which I thought was awesome. If you haven't you should all check out I Hold A Force I Can't Contain , you'll love it, trust me.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

I woke with a start the next morning, cold sweat dripping down my forehead as I rushed out of a nightmare I knew I wouldn't be able to remember. The first thing I was aware of was the soft sounds of my Said The Whale album playing on the stereo next to my bed, and the second was the warm body that was cuddled into my side. After Emily had found me last night, she had insisted we go straight to bed so I could sleep off whatever it was that had me so upset. As I lay awake now, I think it was safe to say it hadn't really helped. I looked over at her, she had her arms wrapped protectively around me as she continued to sleep soundly, with a little smile dancing lightly over her perfect features. My stomach churned, unable to properly handle the myriad of emotions she was currently igniting in me. I was thankful I had her, that was for sure, especially after how wonderful she had been to me last night. She had just held me, lightly stroking my skin every now and then as I drifted off into a fitful sleep. She hadn't pressed me to speak to her about what had gotten me so upset, she was just there.

And the thing was, I didn't know why I was so upset. I mean, obviously I had a good few reasons to be worried, but I wasn't sure what was upsetting me the most. The call and the letter had inflicted too many doubts in me, and I was so fucking mad at myself for being so unsure of how I felt about them. After all, they could mean so many things without Emily being at fault. A jealous ex, a random crazy stalker, an overenthusiatic telemarketer, who knew? I knew I was grasping at straws, but I didn't want to acknowledge the fact that it was possible that someone could be actually trying to warn me. I knew though, that deep down, it was that possibility that had me so upset.

In the short time I'd known her, Emily had made me feel things I never thought possible. I had been with alot of women, sure, but none of them even came close to her. She made me feel like I was eradically shooting all over the place, but so still at the same time. She made me feel like I could carry the whole world on my shoulders. She was exactly what I had always wanted, and these messages had put the thought into my mind that it could be all a fucking lie. I don't know how I'd handle it if it were.

I reached over and brushed a stray hair out of her eyes so I could lean forward and softly kiss her eyes. Because of our conflicting scheduales, I didn't often get to wake up next to my beautiful redheaded lover. I sighed and felt my heart tighten as she smiled in her sleep. That was another thing that was what making this whole thing even more horrible, I thought of her as mine now. And no matter how worried and scared I was of her right now, I still cherished every moment I got to spend with her.

A few moments later as I was still lying with my eyes shut in quiet contemplation, I felt her begin to stir from her slumber. I opened my eyes to find her deep brown ones sleepily staring back at me.

"Morning babe" she whispered, her husky voice even deeper in her sleepy state.

"Morning," I responded with a small smile. My fingers had made their way up to her face, and I was absently stroking her jawline. She reached up, grabbing my hand lightly and pulling it towards her lips, kissing all the way down to my wrist before nuzzling into it again.

"I like waking up next to you," she breathed, looking me directly in the eyes. I felt my heart fluttering at her words, and for a moment, all of my fears were forgotton. I nodded in agreement and leaned forward, capturing her lips in a soft kiss. She smiled contendely as I pulled back and snuggled closer into me.

"So, do you want to tell me what happened last night?"

Wow, that was a short moment.

I looked away, rolling onto my back to face the ceiling. I really didn't know how to answer that question. I supposed I could just tell her the truth, and maybe she would be able to shed some light on what was going on and make me feel better. Maybe it was something we could face together. But a part of me, a large part of me, was afraid to tell her. Afraid that what she would say in response would not be what I wanted to hear.

"It was nothing, just a bad day at work I suppose."

I felt her eyes on me, and I could almost feel the disappointment in them. I was lying, and she fucking knew it. I felt her sigh against me, and I knew she wasn't going to press it. She moved herself to the side so that she was practically on top of me, face to face. She placed her hands on my neck and pulled me into a kiss. A kiss that told me that she'd be there when I want to talk to her about it. She pulled back and I stared deeply into her brown eyes, suddenly feeling an overwhelming, indescribable feeling rushing through me. Without warning, I flipped her onto her back, causing her to let out a small giggle. Her eyes were dancing with amusement, but they quickly turned serious once she saw the look in mine.

I didn't know what I was feeling right now, but I knew I had to show her.

I leaned forward again, kissing her much harder than before to make sure she understood my intentions. I felt her respond eagerly, slipping her tongue into my mouth as she ran her hands down my back. As she reached the hem of my top, she pulled it over my head leaving me in only my knickers. I heard the sounds of one of my favorite songs, A Cold Night Close To The End, floating through the air and I leaned forward to softly kiss Emily's neck. She shuddered as my lips made contact with her skin, and she reached down to pull her own top off as well. I kissed my way down to the swell of her breasts, kissing and nibbling them softly. I took my time to worship every inch of them, and I felt Emily's hands in my hair as she let out little moans of appreciation.

I didn't know what had come over me, but I wanted to taste and touch every inch of her. I wanted to feel her tremble and moan in pleasure as I worked her body into a frenzy. I wanted to see a thin veil of sweat coat her skin, and the blackness of her eyes as she flies over the edge of ecstacy. I wanted Emily to feel what I was feeling, even if I couldn't quite define it.

I kissed my way back up to her lips, pulling off her knickers and leaving my hands resting lightly on her hips. Our legs were entertwined and could feel her wetness coating my thigh. Her hands cupped my cheeks and she ran her thumbs over my lips as our eyes locked. Something intense passed between us, somethings undefinable. It made my chest tighten, and suddenly I couldn't hold myself back any longer.

I kissed her, hard. Our tongues swirled together as I began to trail my hand down her body. I felt her back arch right off the bed as my fingers reached her slick core, and she let out an involuntary moan into my mouth. I traced her swollen nub with my fingertips and I felt her shudder wildly, biting my lip lightly as she did so. Our eyes locked again, and no words were needed,; I knew what she wanted from me.

I plunged two fingers inside of her and she let out a cry of pleasure. Her breathing began to speed up, and I heard my own doing so as well. My heart was beating out my chest as she continued to stare at me, writhing in pleasure but never breaking our eye contact. Nothing had ever felt better than this.

She dug her fingernails into the back of my neck as I continued to pump in and out of her. I quickened my pace slightly, brushed over her clit with my thumb as I did so. She was panting now, her brown eyes were almost black and filled with nothing but desire as her pupils took them over. I could feel the sweat beginning to coat our bodies, and I used my free hand to brush her hair out of her eyes. Her hands moved up from my neck to tangle into my hair and pull me in for a soul shattering kiss.

When we broke apart, she let out a loud moan and I felt her walls begin to clamp around my fingers. I curled them upwards and brushed my thumb rapidly over her swollen nub as she let out a final cry as she fell over the edge.

I held her as she trembled through the aftershocks of her climax, never breaking eye contact as she looked at me with complete adoration in her eyes. I felt like I was the only person in the world.

And she had never looked more beautiful.

* * *

A few hours later, I was on my hands and knees scrubbing the bathroom floor. I was singing along to some awful ninties song on the radio that I somehow knew the words to because I was too fucking lazy to charge my ipod. My all outwards appearances, I suppose I should be happy. But there was an internal battle raging inside of me. Alot had happened in the last 24 hours, and I felt like I hadn't had enough time to process it all.

After Emily left this morning, I had called in sick to work just to give myself a little more time to think things over. This morning had been great despite all of the things that had happened before hand. I still didn't really understand what had passed between us, but I knew it was something pretty fucking wonderful. But even though I had felt like that, I still didn't trust her enough to tell her about the messages, and there was something monumentally fucked up about that. I still didn't really know what to make of them, to be honest I kind of just hoped that it wouldn't happen again. That whoever it was would just give up and leave us to be happy. But the thought still plagued me, that perhaps there was someone out there trying to protect me from something. To protect me from Emily.

Jesus Christ, when had things gotten so fucking complicated?

Just a few weeks ago things had been so much simpler. And then of course everything had to come crashing down after Cook and I first stepped foot into that fucking strip club.

And that's when it hit me.

I hadn't talked to Cook in fucking weeks.

Panic overwhelmed me suddenly. I had barely even thought about him, and for that I felt guilty. I could be such a fucking cow sometimes. But then I realized, he hadn't called me either, and that just wasn't fucking normal. I ran into the living room and grabbed my phone, quickly flipping down to his number and hitting the call button. I listened to the phone ring for what seemed like ages before it finally went to his voicemail. Jesus fucking christ, where was he?

"Cook," I practically shouted into the phone, "I'm sorry I haven't been around the last few weeks, but please call me back as soon as you get this."

I threw my phone at the couch and felt a pit settle in my stomach. Something wasn't fucking right. Cook was a fucking wanker, but it was like him to not call me for weeks. At the same time, I was a bit more likely to fuck off than he was, but it wasn't like me to do this either. Back in the old days, sure, I would disappear with random girls or on random adventures and not call for days, but Cook would always call to check up on me. Something just wasn't fucking right.

I was so upset I was practically shaking. I raced around my living room trying to find my coat; I had to go to his apartment and see if he was okay. Before I could make it out the door, I heard my phone buzzing, alerting me that I had forgotten it on the couch. I picked it up, noticing quickly that I had one new text. I felt my stomach drop when I saw that it was from an unknown number.

_Go to the club, now._

I shook my head in frustration, I didn't want to be dealing with all this right now. I just wanted to see my best mate and know that he was okay. I wanted everything with Emily to be fucking simple and normal and for whoever it was fucking stalking me to just leave me the fuck alone. I wasn't a child, I could take care of myself.

Regardless of all of that though, I was scared. And the text had intruiged me.

I stormed out of my house and jumped into my car, knowing full well where I was going to end up first.

* * *

I stood in front of Tony's Gentleman's Club once again, more terrified to walk in there than I had ever been. Other than the first few times I had been there, I had really only been as far as the entrace or the bar at the most. Emily always seemed to be ready once I got there, and very anxious to pull me out of her workplace. I never really questioned it, I never really questioned anything about her job, and I was starting to think that that may have been a mistake.

I took a deep breath and walked inside.

The music hit me immediately. The thing that I had always thought was cool about this place was that they would play alot of indie music on the quieter nights. I mean, it still had to be upbeat enough for the strippers to dance to it, but they played some cool tunes. Laser Beams by Wintersleep was just starting to build up as I walked in, and I felt my nerves going all over the place.

I made it past the entrance way and started towards the bar. I immediately spotted Emily's sister mixing a drink for some old man. Katie was her name, Emily had told me. We hadn't ever had a proper conversation with each other, besides the time we had spoken briefly when I had come to find Emily right before we started dating. I was suddenly worried that she wouldn't even recognize me, but that fear was quickly replaced with a new one as she spotted me and her eyes filled with a mix of shock and panic. I barely had to time to try and process her reaction to my presence before a flash of red caught my eye from the corner of the club.

I felt my heart stop as I turned around to see Emily, my Emily, wearing barely any clothing and giving a lap dance to some fit looking bloke. His eyes were glazed over as they trailed down her body, and she smirked at him as he reached out to place his hands on her hips. I could literally feel my blood boiling, as she looked at him with that sexy look I remembered so well from the first time we had met.

I was having no outward reaction, and I knew it. I hadn't even blinked. But inside emotions were rushing through me and I suddenly felt like I couldn't breathe. I had to get out of there.

I was vaguely aware of Katie repeatedly yelling "shit" and various other swears as I walked out of the club. I walked, I didn't run. The extent of my devastation hadn't reached the mobility part of my brain just yet, so I was still able to remain calm on the outside. Besides, I knew I had parked close enough that even if Emily tried to chase me down I could get away from her. But she hadn't seen me.

I could feel the tears beginning to slide down my cheeks, and my chest continued to to tighten.

"Naomi, wait!" I heard a voice shout behind me. It was Katie. She sounded shaken and concerned, but I didn't turn around. My body began to react and I started to run. I reached my car and jumped in, speeding off before Katie could even begin to chase after me. I let out a gutwrenching yell of frustration as I pulled into traffic. I openly sobbed as the full extent of what I had just seen hit me.

It was horrible, so fucking horrible that it was right then when I saw my beautiful Emily giving someone else what should only be meant for me, that I realized what I had been feeling this morning. I was in love with her.


	10. Back In Your Head

**Thanks for all the reviews on the last one everyone. I love reading everyone's theories and thoughts on what I'm writing. I find it entertaining, I can't wait to see how you will all react when everythin is revealed! Alot of people had some questions about the last chapter, but just trust me. All of the questions about Naomi's behaviour will be answered in this chapter, and all other questions will be answered before you know it. I have this whole story meticulously planned out, everything has a purpose.**

**Here's another "holy moly it's effing late here" update. I need to learn how to sleep so if there are any mistakes, it's because I'm half asleep. I swear I'll fix them tomorrow. This one is nice and long with a few different scenes so I hope you all like it. I'm also working a double shift today (I have a cakewalk student job so I practically do nothing but do work on my laptop) so I may, MAY, get another update up today/tomorrow. Enjoy.**

* * *

As I sped through the countryside outside of the city, I knew I was fucking overreacting. I was majorly fucking overreacting. But maybe I wasn't, I mean there were so much going on right now, I had every right to be pissed off seeing my girlfriend giving a lap dance to some sodding bloke like that. As if I didn't have enough fucking doubts about this relationship. I mean, yeah, it's her job and all, but I guess hadn't really thought about it like that before. Everytime I had gone there previously, Emily had always been practically dragging me out of there the moment I walked in the door. I guess she got that it would be difficult for me to see her in that position. Realistically, how is it possible for anyone to be perfectly fine with knowing that the person they love provides sexual excitement for others in such a manner? I mean, it's fucking ludicrious to expect anyone to be completely okay with that.

Still, I felt like a fucking cunt for just running off like that. Katie was obviously going to tell Emily that I had been there and seen her, and now we'd have to have the inevitable "are you okay with what I do?" conversation. Christ, I was not looking forward to that, but it was probably necessary if this relationship was going to go somewhere. Jesus, can someone remind me when this stopped being about lust and became so real?

I knew it was always real though, from the moment we first locked eyes right before our first sordid encounter in the back of Tony's sodding Gentleman's club. My life had been in shambles from the moment I met Emily fucking... Emily fucking... fuck I didn't even know her last name.

I pulled my car off to the side of the road right in front of the pathway to my lake. I shut off the engine and leaned forward, banging my head lightly on the steering wheel. What did I actually know about this girl? I felt like the only thing I really knew about her, was that I loved her. But how could I love her if I didn't really know her at all. Fuck, this was too bloody complicated.

I jumped out of the car, slamming the door so hard I was afraid I'd shattered the window. I practically ran down the pathway, desparate to reach the one place where I knew I'd be able to think clearly. As I saw the lake come into my vision, I felt relief flood over me. I stopped at the edge and flicked off my flats so I could dip my feet in the slightly cool water. As my feet touched the water, a chill ran through my body, and at that moment, my phone buzzed in my pocket.

I took my phone at it and looked at as if it were some bizarre alien object. I really wasn't in the mood for communcating with anyone right now, so I just put it on silent and tossed it aside without reading the new text I had. I thought back to the text I had gotten telling me to go to the club. Obviously, it had been the same person leaving me the messages, and obviously they wanted me to go there because they knew I would freak out in the exact way I had. Fuck, whoever this was knew me, they fucking knew me well. But who the fuck would want to sabotage my relationship with Emily, or perhaps save me from her? I genuinely had no idea.

I rubbed my eyelids hard, trying desperately to process all of the information that was currently running though my brain. Okay, so there was the message, the warnings, and Emily. Sweet, beautiful, sexy Emily, no damnit! I needed to think cleary, be rational. There were three things to figure out, first of all, who was sending the messages? Second of all, why were they sending them? Did they just want to break us up, or did I really need saving? And lastly, could I trust Emily?

People had always told me that love was complicated thing. I had never really understood love, I mean sure, I had had some intense affairs but love? I didn't think I had ever experienced it. And now, now that I had plunged so deeply into the depths of the one feeling that could simultaneously save and destroy me, it was nothing I expected it to be. It was the opposite in fact. People had always made love sound so fucking boring. The passion would die and there be nothing left but a stable relationship that could be maintained over a lifetime. I had never understood how someone could be truly satisfied waking up to the same face every morning for the rest of their lives. But with Emily, the thought didn't seem so bad. Everything about her, everything I knew anyway, was so perfect and wonderful. And what I felt for her was so passionate, so crazy and out of control, yet so constant at the same time. It was something I could imagine maintaining and enjoying for the rest of my life, it was something I wanted.

Yet, I didn't even know the girl, and I felt like I couldn't even fucking trust her. Well, they were right anyway, love really was fucking complicated.

So there it was, I had three questions I needed answered, and I wasn't going to get any answers by sitting in seclusion out here. I dragged myself to my feet, picking up my phone as I got up, and started the short hike back to my car. The sun was beginning to fall in the sky casting an eerie red glow through the trees. I flipped open my phone, suddenly remembering the text I had gotten while I was at the lake, and was surprised to find I had several texts as well as five missed calls. All from Emily.

_Hey, Katie told me you stopped by... I'm so sorry you had to see that babe. Please text me to let me know you're okay :(. Xxoo – Em._

_Where are you Naoms? I tried calling, please don't ignore me I'm so sorry!_

_Hey babe, I'm starting to get a little worried. Please let me know you're okay xxoo._

_Naomi, I know you're upset but I need to see you. I'm coming over, please talk to me babe :(_

I smiled as I read over each text again. Well, she definitely cared about me, that much was clear. There was only so much you could fake, and I was sure that she felt something for me. Whether it was as strong as what I felt for her, I wasn't sure. But there was definitely something there.

I shut my phone, deciding I wasn't ready to respond just yet. There was someone else I had to see first.

* * *

I pulled up outside Cook's apartment complex with a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I had tried his cell another few times on the way over and had gotten no answer once again. I hoped to fuck that he was home and just passed out from a long night on the town. I didn't know what I would do otherwise. He wasmy best mate, and I was fucking worried about him. It wasn't like us to not speak for weeks, something was going on.

I pressed the buzzer once I got to the front door, and was unsuprised when I got no answer. Cook never made it to his fucking buzzer anyway. I rang one of the neighbors to get in and started the trek to the top floor. I reached Cook's door and banged on it as hard as I could.

"James Cook, open the door you fucking tosser."

Nothing.

"Cook, it's me, seriously, open the sodding door."

Still nothing.

I tried the door. Locked, of course. Jesus Christ where was he? I was really starting to get fucking worried. I grabbed my bag and dug around inside of it, finally finding the spare key that Cook had given me for emergencies. I felt my stomach leap in my throat as I pushed the small piece of metal through the hole and heard the lock clip open. I held my breath, hesitating just a moment before finally pushing open the door.

I stepped into the dark apartment, my heart beating wildly in my chest. I fumbled in the darkness for the light switch and flicked it on. The place was spotless, in fact, it looked like Cook hadn't been here for days.

"Jesus Christ Cook," I whispered to myself as I bent down to pick up the mail that had been pushed through his mail slot. It looked like he hadn't been here for fucking ages.

I searched the rest of the apartment, and everything else was in check. If he had flitted off somewhere, he hadn't taken much with him. I found his cellphone on the desk in his bedroom, still on the fucking charger.

I knew Cook, and I knew he wouldn't go away anywhere with out telling me, or at least taking his fucking cell phone. Something wasn't right.

I whipped out my cell phone to call the police before suddenly remembering something. The brunette stripper. Cook had fucked the brunette stripper just like I had fucked Emily. In fact, I hadn't seen him since that night that we had left the club with them.

"Fuck," I shouted into the empty apartment. The brunette stripper, she would know something. She had to fucking know something. But I didn't know her name. I didn't know anything about her other than where she worked, and in all the times I had been there in the last few weeks I hadn't seen her once. Then something hit me like a ton of bricks. Emily would know.

I ran out of the apartment, locking the door behind me and bounded down the stairs. I jumped in my car and fired off a quick message to Emily telling her to meet me at my apartment. Something was fucking going on, and I was going to find out what.

* * *

I pulled into the parking complex in my building, unsuprised to find Emily already there waiting for me leaning casually against the entrance. She was wearing the same fucking skimpy outfit she had been earlier, with a black leather jacket thrown over it to hide her body a little more. She looked tired though, tired and really fucking anxious. Seeing her had ignited all the anger and uncertainty I was feeling once again, so much so that I could practically feel my eyes burning.

I jumped out of the car and she started towards me with her mouth already open. Ready to talk, ready to bloody apologize. But before she could get anything out, I held up my hands to tell her not to bother.

"Save it," I muttered through gritted teeth, "come with me."

I walked right past her, barely registering the look of hurt that flashed over her beautiful features. We stepped into the lift and I couldn't look at her, but she did nothing but look at me. We got to my floor and I burst out of there as quickly as I could, unable to stand the tension between us in such close quarters. She followed hastily, almost directly on my heels as we wound through the corriders until we reached the door to my apartment. I unlocked it and walked in ahead of her, hoping she would take the hint and follow me in. I walked in to the centre of my living room and dropped my keys on the table. I felt frantic, I felt uncontrollable. I hardly knew how I would react when she finally broke the silence and spoke.

The door clicked close behind me but I kept my back to her. I had so many fucking questions. Who was the stripper? Who would leave me those messages? Should I be scared of her or was someone just fucking with me? Where the fuck was Cook? Did she love me? Could I trust her?

I rubbed my temples in a vain attempt to stop my brain from going into fucking overdrive.

"Naomi.."

She spoke, and I did not react the way I anticipated.

"Don't," I responded simply, calmly. I was surprised, but I knew she was confused and I suddenly knew I needed to do the talking.

"I'm going to talk now," I added, still not facing her.

"Emily, who was that brunette stripper that was with my best mate, Cook the night we met."

She didn't answer right away. I heard her take a deep breath and I could almost feel the waves of fear and trepidation coming off of her.

"You don't want to talk about..."

"No, Emily," I interrupted, "no, I can't. Not yet. I need to know the answer to this first."

"Why, why would you want to.."

"Because Cook is fucking missing," I spat, turning to look her in the eye for the first time. She looked terrified, and fucking broken, but I knew I couldn't buckle. I needed answers. "Who is she Emily?"

Emily sighed and shook her head. "Naomi, I can't tell you her name. We... well, strippers that is... are entitled to remain anonymous. She doesn't give out her name to anyone."

"I don't care about some sodding rule Emily," I screamed, grabbing a nearby magazine and tossing it across the room. She flinched, clearly surprised at my sudden display of emotion. "I haven't seen my best fucking mate in weeks, he hasn't been to his apartment in at least two weeks and he doesn't have his phone. The last person I know he was with, was that fucking stripper."

I took a few steps closer to her, I was so mad I felt I was fucking burning. There were so many emotions playing on her face I could barely decide which one to focus on. She looked surprised, angry, confused, hurt, and even a little bit fucking turned on. But most of all, she looked conflicted. Like she didn't know how to respond to the demand that was going to come out of my mouth next.

"Tell me her fucking name."

Her eyes blazed into mine, and I could feel the electricity burning between us. There was nothing soft about the way we were looking at each other.

"Naomi, I'm sorry about your friend, but I can't help you. Maybe you should call the police."

The way she looked at me as she responded had me wanting to slam her up against the wall. Whether it was to force to answer out of her of to fuck the shit out of her, I wasn't sure. But I was having a fucking hard time controlling my emotions. I balled my fists so hard I could feel my nails breaking the skin of my palms. Without even noticing I had taken the remaining steps needed to close the distance between us, and we were now face to face. The look in her eyes was defiant, and it was really fucking turning me on. But I was pissed, I was fucking pissed that she wouldn't help me. I slammed one of my hands into the door behind her, and she didn't flinch. We were so fucking close now we were barely not touching.

"I'll find out you know," I seethed at her with an intensity I didn't know I had in me, "I don't care if I have to beat it out of someone, something is going on here and I'm going to find my fucking friend."

"Why are you doing that?" she asked, both her voice and her eyes suddenly softer.

"Because he's my best mate and..."

"No, not that," she countered, interrupting me, "why are you talking to me like I'm your fucking enemy?"

"Are you?" I asked, unsure if I wanted to hear the answer.

"You tell me," she whispered, before grabbing me and pulling me into a soul shattering kiss. My lips burned as hers brushed against them with enough force to leave a bruise. Her toungue lashed against mine like an electric current, leaving my entire body shaking as she pulled away. She looked me directly in the eyes, looking into my soul and daring me to tell her any different than what she had just told me with no words at all.

"Naomi, I'm sorry I can't help you. But can you please just trust me that I have my reasons. If there was anything I could do, I would you have to believe me. The only thing I can suggest is to go and talk to her yourself. Her stage name is Beth, that should get you far enough to get some answers."

I searched her eyes, trying to find any sign that she would dare lie to me when I was this upset. She held my gaze firmly, but her eyes were guarded. She was hiding something, and I couldn't tell whether it was out of fear or deception. But for now, I had enough information to let it go. For the time being, anyway.

"Alright," I answered, backing away from her once again.

"Wait," she whispered, stepping forward to close to distance between us again.

"I thought we were gonna..." she trailed off, her eyelids lowered as she stared at my lips. Her hands had snaked there way up my back and were now resting on my neck, drawing me closer to her. "You're so fucking sexy when you're angry," she finished, biting her lip in that way that drove me fucking crazy.

I could feel the wetness pooling between my legs at her words. I let out an involuntary sudden as one of her hands snaked it way down my side and looped a finger in my belt loop. Our hips slammed together and I groaned slightly. I could feel her breath on my lips. I wanted her so bad I could practically hear my libido screaming at me to just fuck the extremely hot girl that was practically begging me to.

But I couldn't. There was still so much on my fucking mind. I needed some time alone, to think. And I needed to go back to the club to question "Beth" on Cook's whereabouts, and having Emily tagging along with me was the last thing I needed.

So I pulled away, and the look of hurt that shot through her brown eyes was enough to nearly rip my heart out of my chest. Regardless of what I was feeling right now, I needed to make that look go away. Man, I really fucking loved this girl.

"I'm sorry Em, it's just... I have alot on my mind right now. I need some time by myself... to do some thinking... by myself. I just don't think that's the best idea right now."

"Is this about earlier?" she asked quietly, bowing her head slightly. She almost looked like she was ashamed.

"No... yes... I don't know. I mean, of course it is. I can't tell you that I liked seeing you like that Emily... I mean I know it's your job. I just hated seeing the way he looked at you. And the way you looked at him, like the way you at me. It was..."

"Hey," she whispered, grabbing my chin so I would look her in the eye, "I've never looked at anyone the way that I look at you."

I felt myself smiling, because I knew she meant it. I didn't know how, but I bloody knew it. I leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on her lips.

"Things are just complicated right now, I have some things I need to figure out. Then we'll talk, yeah?"

She nodded, biting her lip slightly as she leaned in to kiss me a final time before pulling away completely.

"I guess, if you need time. But I don't know how I'm going to cope with how worked up you've got me," she said flirtatiously.

"I'm sure you can think of something," I whispered, almost physically restraining myself from jumping her. She placed her finger on her chin, scrunched her nose and rolled her eyes upwards as if she was deep in thought. God she was so fucking adorable, how could I stay mad at her?

She winked at me and turned around to open the door. I was about to follow her out when she stopped and glanced back at me over her shoulder.

"Just remember babe, while you're thinking things over, I'll be naked wrapped up in my sheets making myself scream out your name over and over again as I imagine how fucking hot you look when you're pissed off."

And with that, she was gone. Fuck me, I really hoped it turned out I could trust her. I really didn't fancy being alone for the rest of my life, and I knew that there was no fucking way anyone would ever compare to Emily. Jesus Christ I was fucked.

I closed my eyes and rubbed them hard, trying to forget the effect she had on me. I needed to focus.

I turned around and grabbed my cell and keys. I waited the appropriate amount of time I figured it would take Emily to get out of the building and dashed out the front door.

My best mate was missing, I was being stalked, and I didn't know if I could trust the woman I was in love with. I needed fucking answers.

* * *

**Just an additional note:)**

**I don't normally ask for reviews (directly, hehe) but luuuurve them. And In my sleep deprived/over-worked state I'm feeling greedy. Anyway, in my awesome amount of free time I had today, I wrote three (yes count em, three) additional chapters to this story. So the question is, how badly do you want them? ;) (Yes, I know, I'm quite evil. :))**


	11. Science Of Fear

**As promised...**

* * *

Why was it that every time I was outside of Tony's fucking Gentleman's Club I had to hesitate for a few moments before I went in? It was becoming bloody well psychological, it was like I needed a minute before I was mentally prepared to deal with whatever I was going to find inside. Whether it was a lame bachelor party, a stripper I wanted to fuck, or my girlfriend giving a lap dance to some wanker, this place was always a surprise. This time was no different. Well, it was a little different, because this time I had to at least look confident as I walked in there, regardless of how I was actually feeling. I took a deep breath and started forward. There was something so unnerving about that place that regardless of how many times I went there, it always felt fucking scary.

I stepped inside for the second time today and I was automatically hit with a wave of deja vu. It was a Saturday evening, so the place was pretty full. The usuals were in their corners looking fucking creepy as usual, but there were tons of bachelor parties and other groups around everywhere as well. I didn't see "Beth" anywhere, so I headed toward the bar to see if I could be pointed in her direction.

When I finally made my way through the crowd, I was relieved to find that Katie wasn't behind the bar like she was this afternoon. I briefly wondered why Emily had no problem telling me Katie's name, but I figured it was either just because they were sisters or Katie gave her permission to tell me. Plus, I had never actually seen Katie stripping so maybe she just worked the bar.

I leaned against the counter and caught the eye of the extremely busty, but plastic looking bottle blonde working the bar. She sauntered towards me, trying to give me her best sexy stare but failing miserably.

"What can I get you, gorgeous?" she purred once she was close enough for me to hear her.

I fought hard with myself not to roll my eyes and scowl at her. Emily may be a mystery, but she's still pretty fucking wonderful, and this slag looks and acts like pre-packaged recycled sewage in comparison. Rather than play the game and flirt back, I decided to just cut straight to the chase.

"Yeah, is Beth working tonight?"

Her face dropped the moment the words left my mouth, but she quickly regained her composure.

"I can give you anything she can babe, and more," she replied, licking her lips in a way that I'm sure she thought was sensual, but she actually ended up looking like she was trying to clean her bloody face.

"I'm alright thanks," I countered quickly enough to wipe that confident smirk right off her face, "just point me toward Beth and I'll be on my way."

She scowled and pointed toward the back of the club before turning her attention to flirting with a more willing customer. I turned around and immediately spotted her through the crowd. Evidently, she had spotted me first, because she was looking right at me with some kind of fucking knowing look on her face. I just stared back at her, feeling my anger bubbling over the longer I looked at her. After a moment, she turned and headed out through the back door. I quickly rushed through the club, determined not to let her escape me that easily.

I pushed my way through the door and was surprised to find her waiting for me in the alley. She had a fag between her fingertips and she was standing here just fucking smirking at me. Christ, I really wanted to rip that look right off her face.

"_Beth, _is it then," I asked, lacing venom though the emphasis I added to her stage name.

She just looked at me, exhaling the smoke and not saying a fucking word.

"What's your real name then, _Beth."_

"Effy," she answered simply, catching me off guard.

"You told me your name, just like that... I thought never told it to any customers," I managed to stutter out in response.

The shock of her answering so bluntly must have been clearly displayed on my face, because she looked extremely amused.

"But you're not just a customer, are you Naomi?" she answered, "And, I owed you one answer."

I quirked my eyebrow at her words. Christ, if Emily was a mystery this girl was a fucking enigma.

"Where's Cook then?" I asked, taking a step closer to her.

"Cook?" she asked, exhaling through her apparently permanent amused smirk.

"Yes Cook, James Cook. My fucking best mate that you fucked multiple times that is now fucking missing," I seethed, stepping forward so we were practically nose to nose.

"I told you I owed you one answer, now you've got it. So if you'll excuse me," she countered, stepping forward to move past me, but I was too quick for her. I grabbed her arm and slammed her in to the wall behind us. Her eyes widened in shock at first, but her look of surprise was quickly replaced with one of dark amusement. Jesus, that must be her favorite fucking expression.

"Look at you then," she breathed, looking me up and down carefully, "I can see why our Red likes you so much."

"Where's Cook," I repeated, placing my arms on either side of her shoulders so she couldn't run away from me.

"I can't help you, Naomi," she whispered, leaning forward so that she was almost touching my lips with hers. I flinched slightly as I felt her breath on my lips, but I didn't pull away. I knew she wouldn't dare.

"I'm not very good at keeping track of my boys, but if you see him. Tell him to call me."

With that, I let her saunter away. She was fucking lying to me, and I knew it. But she was so clever and deceptive, there was no way I was ever going to get the truth out of her.

I leant my head forward into the spot where she had been just moments ago. I was so fucking frustrated, and still had no answers other than the fact that the brunette stripper's name was Effy and she wasn't going to tell me a fucking thing. I spun around so I was leaning against my back against the wall and pulled out a fag of my own. The beats from the inside of the club were thumping right along with my own rapid heart beat as the millions of thoughts plaguing me continued to race through my brain. What was I going to do now? I took a long drag and flipped out my cell, noticing I had a new text and a missed call from an unknown number. The text, unsuprisingly, was from Emily.

_Hey babes, just wanted to let you know I'm ready and waiting when you finish thinking ;). Xxoo Em._

I smiled in spite of myself, fuck she was a little vixen. I pushed myself off the wall and headed towards the alley towards my car. I figured I would call the police to report that Cook and then maybe go home and get some sleep.

I rounded the corner to the back of the club and stopped in my tracks when I spotted two men who appeared to be involved in a some sort of sketchy rendezvous. I didn't quite understand why, but I quickly crouched behind a dumpster so that they wouldn't see me. My instincts seemed to be taking over, and it seemed as thought they were spot on. Something shady was going on back here. I watched as the taller man handed a rather large duffel bag to the shorter one.

"This is the good stuff, yeah? Just like last time," I heard the shorter man ask.

"Same as every time, Tony."

So that was Tony! Fuck, he didn't look at all like I expected him to; I had expected someone much, much older to be honest. I watched as the man I now knew to be Tony reached into the bag and pulled out several bags of powders and liquids. My eyebrows almost shot off my face as the realization hit me. So he was a fucking drug dealer... shit.

I suddenly found myself running in the other direction as fast as I could, the last thing I needed was being spotted spying on a drug deal. I didn't know much about drugs, but I knew enough to know there must have been tens of thousands of dollars worth of stuff in that bag. Christ, I was becoming a fucking detective. As if this club couldn't get any fucking sketchier, now I find out that the owner is a fucking drug dealer.

Suddenly, I remembered the conversation I had overheard between Tony and Emily. Fucking hell, what had she gotten herself into here?

I didn't allow myself to ponder what was going on, instead I jumped in my car and sped off towards Emily's place determined to find the answer. I made it a few blocks before slamming on the brakes, bringing my car to screeching halt.

I didn't know where Emily fucking lived.

Fucking hell this was getting really bloody complicated. Was I really that wrapped up in this girl that I had missed out on all of these important details? I whipped out my phone and fired off a text to Emily, asking her just that. It wasn't long before my phone vibrated in my hand and I flicked it open to read her reply.

_Don't worry about it babes. I'll come to you, see you soon._

Okay there was something seriously fucking wrong with this picture. So she didn't want me to know where she lived. Christ, what was she fucking hiding from me? How was it possible for this to keep getting worse?

Before I could even begin to freak out about the newest developments in the drama that had become my life, my phone buzzed again. This time it was a phone call; from an unknown number. I held my breath as I put the phone to my ear.

"Hello."

"_Hello, is this Naomi Campbell?"_

"Yes..."

" _I wasn't sure if that was a joke or not."_

I rolled my eyes at her comment, fucking typical people thinking my name was fake. It wasn't as if I was the only person to ever have the same name as fucking celebrity.

"_Anyway, Miss Campbell, I'm calling from St Michaels Hospital here in Bristol. You're listed as the emergency contact for a... James Cook?"_

My heart leapt in my throat as her words sunk in. I guess everything could still get fucking worse.

"Yes, yes, he's my best friend, is everything alright?"

"_I'm afraid not Miss Campbell. Mr. Cook was brought to us just a few hours ago in very severe condition, we recommend you get here as soon as possible."_

I couldn't speak, I couldn't fucking breathe. The words "Cook," "severe," and "as soon as possible," kept ringing through my ears as loudly as a bloody trumpet. This couldn't fucking be happening, it just couldn't.

"_Miss Campbell are you there?"_

"Right sorry," I responded, remembering my ability to speak, "I'll be there right away."

I threw the phone down and spun around in the opposite direction. I sped through traffic like a fucking mad woman, but I didn't fucking care at this point. I had absolutely nothing left to lose, everything was in fucking shambles.

It felt like only seconds later that I was pulling up outside the hospital. I parked in the first open parking spot I could see and dashed towards the entrance to the emergency. I pulled out my phone to switch it off and noticed I had a new text message, again from an unknown number.

_If he doesn't die, they'll kill him. Take care of him Naomi, we'll be in touch soon._

Fucking hell.

* * *

**Thoughts? I'll probably get the other one up sometime soon.... but I kind of like this cliffhanger. Hope you enjoy these developments. Again... lack of sleep caused any mistakes/weirdness.**


	12. Nice Dream

I rushed through the doors of the emergency room, momentarily putting aside the mystery texts and all the other shit going on in my life right now so I could concentrate on finding out whether or not my best mate was alright. I spotted the reception desk and ran over, slightly starting the woman seated behind it.

"Hi, my name is Naomi Campbell, I got a phone call about my friend James Cook."

"Ah yes, Miss Campbell," she answered with a genuine smile. "Dr. Cooper asked me to inform him when you arrived. Have a seat over there, I'll call him right away."

I nodded absently and turned away from her. She was clearly a nice woman, but I was hardly in any state to show any gratitude for her kindness. From the way she had looked at me, I was sure she understood anyway. I took a seat in the corner of the almost empty waiting room. I was surprised it wasn't more populated, considering it was a Saturday night and all. I guessed they were probably having a slow evening.

The minutes ticked by agonizingly as I waited for the doctor to appear. A million different scenarios ran through my mind as I tried to imagine what could possibly have happened to Cook during the last few weeks. I could only hope that I would get to ask him myself.

Finally, after what seemed like fucking ages, a tall, older man in a white lab coat burst out through the emergency doors and started making his way towards me. I got to my feet, holding my breath and bracing myself for the worst as he began to speak.

"Miss Campbell?" he asked with genuine concern in his eyes. Oh fuck this was going to be bad.

"Yes," I answered quietly, my voice shaking.

"My name is Dr. Cooper. Your friend James Cook was found passed out in an alleyway by a construction worker earlier this evening. He was suffering from a rather severe heroin overdose, as well as a few rather serious infections in his numerous injection points."

My jaw just about dislocated itself from the rest of my face as I listened to him drone on about Cook's long term drug use and infections. I could barely even focus on the fact that he was still forming words. As far as I knew, Cook hadn't touched the stuff in more than four years. Jesus, what had happened to him in the last few weeks? My brain was spinning in overdrive and I had to remind myself to breathe as I suddenly remembered that I was still being spoken to.

"I'm sorry Miss Campbell, are you alright?"

"Yes... I mean no, no I'm not alright " I answered shakily, "It's just Cook, well, he's my best mate and he's never been a serious user. As far as I knew he hadn't touched the stuff in years. I just can't understand how this could happen."

"I assure you, Miss Campbell, that Mr. Cook has a very serious drug problem. It is not clear how long he has been using, but I can assure you that this was not a one time thing. When was the last time you saw him?"

"About, three weeks ago..." I answered, trailing off, "he kind of disappeared."

"Well, Miss Campbell, it appears he was using copious amounts of heroin and several other drugs during that time period. He's lucky to be alive right now, and the road ahead is going to be long and difficult. We're keeping him in an induced coma for now so that his body can recover from the extensive trauma that it has faced. But Miss Campbell, I need you to understand that your friend has been through alot and there's a very real possibility that... he may not wake up at all."

I felt as though my whole world was crashing down around me as the words floated into my brain. No, it just wasn't possible. It wasn't possible that I could lose him, we had been through everything together. How could I let this fucking happen to him?

"You can see him if you like," the doctor said suddenly, snapping me out of my reverie.

I nodded absently, feeling myself trembling as his words continued to sink into my already overwhelmed mind, and started to follow him through the big emergency doors. I just couldn't wrap my head around Cook using again. It had been years since we had been into that shit, and even then we were never hardcore about it. Cook and I had sworn off anything that wasn't a spliff years ago, I just couldn't believe he would do that. And now, there was a possibility that he wouldn't fucking wake up... no I couldn't bare that thought. Cook would wake up, he was too strong for that. Fuck where had all of this gone so wrong? I balled my fists as realization dawned over me; I bet this had something to do with Effy and Tony's fucking Gentleman's Club. Especially now that I knew Tony was fucking drug lord.

The doctor lead me into a small hospital room, holding the door open for me so I could follow him in. I hesitated for a moment, terrified of what I was going to see lying the hospital bed just out of my line of sight. I took a deep breath and took the final step forward to face what was waiting for me in that room.

The doctor stood behind me as I eased my way into the room. My face wore more shock than I thought was humanly possible as I took in the sight of what could only be described as a shell of my best mate. He looked so gaunt, like he had lost about thirty pounds since the last time I had seen him. He had bruises all over his face and exposed skin, he just looked so fucking broken. And perhaps most surprising, he had a disgustingly scruffy beard. In all the time I had known Cook, he never had any facial hair. He always said he thought it was bloody well disgusting.

"Right then, I'll leave you to it," the doctor said, reminding me of his presence. "Just remember that visiting hours are over, so just don't stay too long."

I smiled gratefully at him as he left the room before turning my attention back towards Cook lying motionless on the hospital bed. I took a few tentative steps toward him, almost expecting him to jump up and scare the shit out of me screaming that it was all one big joke. If only, I found myself thinking. I took a seat in the chair next to his bedside and reached for his hand. His skin was cold, and I immediately noticed the large amount of bandages on his arm, probably covering up the infections he got from injecting himself. Fuck injecting.

"Jesus Christ Cook," I whispered, tears forming in my eyes, "what the fuck happened to you? How did any of this happen? One minute we were happy, well maybe not happy but content at least, and then the next you're lying in a fucking hospital bed and I don't know what the fuck is happening."

I wiped the tears away from my eyes, and suppressed a sob. I couldn't keep the tears at bay anymore.

"Cook, I don't know what fucking happened to you, but I need you to wake up so we can sort this out. So you can help me sort out everything. Something's wrong Cook, and I think it's something to do with that club. I don't know who I can trust Cook, please... Cook... I fucking need you."

I laid my head on his hand and just finally let go. I cried about everything, the messages, the drugs, Cook, Effy... Emily. Sobbing freely for no one to see, I let it all out. I must have cried for a solid half and hour before I realized I had probably stayed longer than I was supposed to. I dropped a kiss on Cook's forehead, promising I would come back as soon as I could even though I knew he probably couldn't hear me.

I dragged myself through the corrider of the hospital and out the front doors, but not before stopping off at the reception desk to make sure that they would call me the second that Cook woke up. I also double checked with the security in the building that they would keep an eye on him, I couldn't be too carefull after the latest text from my friendly neighborhood stalker.

I stepped out into the cool night air and took a deep breath. I checked my watch, suprised to find that it was after midnight. Jesus Christ, where had the time gone? I knew I was too tired to do anything else, including thinking things over, tonight. So, I resolved myself to go home and get a good nights sleep and start fresh in the morning. Where I'd start? Well, I hadn't gotten that far yet, but that was something I would have to face in the morning.

The drive from the hospital to my flat seemed to take seconds, and before I knew it I was standing at my front door fumbling through my bag to find my keys. In my frustration, I flicked the latch and was suprised to find it already open. I guessed I had forgotten to lock it when i left earlier today. Fucking brilliant Naomi, someone's stalking you and your girlfriend might be a dangerous criminal and you go and leave your door unlocked all evening. I can be so fucking smart sometimes.

I was too exhausted to be bothered being apprehensive of what could possibly be waiting for me inside my dark flat, so I just walked inside and flicked on the lights without hesitation. My heart leapt in my throat as a came face to face with quite possibly the last person I wanted to see right now.

She smirked at me when she first caught my eye, but her lips fell into a frown once she caught sight of what a disheveled mess I was. She took a tentative step towards me, her dark eyes filling to the brim with concern.

"Sorry," she started, explaining herself, "I let myself in with the key in your lockbox and... Christ Naomi, what happened to you?"

I was too tired for this. I was too tired to have this conversation, to yell and scream at her about Cook and the messages and everything else, and to finally get some fucking answers. I was too tired to try and decipher whether or not the immense amount of emotion shining in her eyes right then was genuine or forced. And I was too tired to fight off the fact that I loved her enough for nothing else to matter but the fact that she was here, and I fucking needed her right now.

"Emily..." I started, my voice shaking heavily with the sobs I was trying to hold in, "so much has happened... and so much is happening... and I have so many questions... but.. I just... I just..."

My voice broke and I crumbled into myself, leaning backwards and sliding down the door until I collapsed in a heap on the floor. Emily stopped hesitating and rushed towards me, dropping herself to my side and wrapping her arms around me. She brushed my hair out of my eyes and kissed my tears away, just as she had done the night before. I leaned into her neck and inhaled her scent, allowing her to surround and calm me, for the moment anyway. I could feel her heart racing in her chest as I held her close, alerting me that she probably knew that this was just the calm before the storm.

It was amazing really, how she could be both the last and only person I wanted to be with at the same time.

* * *

**I'll have the next one up ASAP, and trust me... it'll be worth the wait. ;)**


	13. Danse Macabre

**Thanks as usual for the reviews, from both my usuals and all the new people. I realize things aren't looking so good for our girls right now, and that some of you may be losing faith in me, but you just have trust me. This is where this story was going to go all along. I was iffy about the last chapter, but I'm very proud of this one. This chapter is exactly what I invisioned happening from the very first time I brought these characters together in chapter one. I hope that despite the fact that it may not be exactly what you all hoped to happen, this is where I always wanted it to go and I hope you will continue reading. I don't want to give away any more of the plot so I won't say anything else but to trust me. There is still alot more story to be told.**

**That being said, enjoy. I'm looking forward to reading what you all think about this, good or bad.**

* * *

I awoke on my couch several hours later still snuggled tightly into Emily's chest. I was surprised at first, I had really anticipated her running away considering the conversation we were inevitably going to have once I had woken up. I knew for sure now that something with her wasn't right. She was involved with some bad people, and whoever was warning me to stay away from her probably had a good reason to do so. But that didn't change the fact that every inch of my skin that was touching hers was tingling. It didn't change the fact that my heart raced at simply the thought of her, and that when I was with her I felt more alive than I had ever felt in my whole life. It didn't change the fact that I was in love with her.

It was fucked up really, considering the fact that my life had pretty turned upside down from the moment she walked into it. But I still just couldn't believe that she would intentionally hurt me. The way that she would look at me sometimes, with such unveiled adoration dancing in her soul crushing brown eyes, it made me sure that what she felt for me was something she couldn't explain. Yet she couldn't open herself up to me, I barely knew anything about her. And I needed to find out why.

I suddenly felt a pair of lips pressed into my forehead. She was awake.

I wasn't sure why, but I continued to feign sleep. I could feel her eyes burning through me as I kept my breathing even and my body still. Her fingers made their way to my cheek and I could feel her stroking my jawline lightly.

"Jesus Naomi, how could I let this get so fucking complicated?" she whispered quietly, blissfully unaware that I could hear everything she was saying. She leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on my lips, and as her cheek brushed mine I could feel that they were tear stained. It was all I could do to restrain myself from kissing her back. She pulled away and began slowly extracting herself from my embrace. I let out an involuntary shiver at the loss of her warmth, my body's way of informing me she belonged in my arms I suppose. The room was silent for a few moments, and I couldn't feel her eyes on me so I assumed she was trying to sneak out without waking me. But a few seconds later I felt her place a blanket around me and drop a soft kiss on my forehead. My heart fluttered at her thoughtfulness, despite everything.

"I'm so sorry, Naomi," she whispered so quietly that I almost didn't hear her. I could feel her watching me for a few moments before I finally heard her shuffle through my flat and out the front door.

As I heard the latch click shut, I opened my eyes and sat up on the couch. She had snuck out, but like I said before, I was surprised she had remained with me as long as she had. She probably had some thinking to do of her own with the inevitable barage of questions that were coming her way. I sighed loudly and allowed myself to fall back onto the couch. This was well and truly fucked up. Despite the fact that Emily could quite possibly turn out to be the person I'm supposed to be afraid of, I didn't feel quite as safe now that she was gone.

I allowed myself to fall into another fitful sleep, telling myself that I would give Emily tomorrow to think and then ask her to meet me tomorrow night to talk. Fucking hell, I really hope she's got a good explanation for all this.

* * *

I woke hours later to find the sun blasting in through my window, effectively burning my retinas as I jumped to my feet to shut the curtains. I yawned and stretched before picking my cell phone off of the floor in front of the door where I had dropped it last night. Fucking hell, it was two o'clock in the afternoon. I guess I was really knackered when I got home last night. I figured Emily had left around 5 in the morning, and she hadn't texted or called since then. No surprise there.

I let out a heavy sigh and wandered into the kitchen to make myself some coffee. I made a quick call to the hospital to check on Cook while I waited for the coffee making to finish. I was disappointed, but not surprised, when they told me there was no change. I told them to make sure security kept checking up on them and that I would bring by some of his things later this afternoon. I heard the timer go off on my coffee maker and poured myself of a generous mug full before heading out to drink it on my balcony.

I stepped through the double doors and took a deep breath when the air hit me. It was refreshing to be outdoors. It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon, the sun was high in the sky and there wasn't a cloud in sight. I figured all of the storm clouds were currently flooding my brain, so there none left to fill the skies of Bristol for once. I walked over to the small table I had out on the balcony and sat down in one of the chairs, laying my coffee and yellow legal pad in front of me. My mind was so crazy and hectic right now, I figured the only way to properly prepare myself for the conversation I was about to have with Emily was to make a list of questions I wanted to ask her.

I started off simple, well at least with the simplest of questions I had to ask her: "why won't you let me get to know you?" In all the time we had spent together, it was becoming more and more and apparent to me that I didn't know a thing about Emily. I didn't know her last name, where she lived, who her friends were, why she was a stripper, or anything else of substance. Almost everything we talked about, when we actually did talk that was, was completely trivial and unimportant small talk. I could hardly believe I had let her preoccupy me so much. We had pretty much spent the last fews weeks running on nothing but laughter and mindblowing sex. It had been wonderful at the time, but I knew I should now more about her.

Which lead me right to the second question: "what are you hiding?" That was a loaded question if there ever was one. I wanted to know everything, I wanted to know if she knew about Tony's drug dealing. I wanted to know if she knew about Cook and Effy. I wanted to know if there really was a good reason for whoever it was fucking stalking me to be warning me to stay away from her.

And that lead me to my third question, "do you really love me, or is this all a fucking lie?"

There was alot more I wanted to know, but I thought that the questions were broad enough that she would fill in the blanks herself. I finished my coffee and headed back into the apartment. After jumping in the shower and tidying myself up a bit, I grabbed my keys and headed for the door. I stopped momentarily to read over the three questions I had written down over again. Fuck, I hoped they would get me the answers I needed.

* * *

I parked my car in the temporary parking in front of Cook's flat and headed to the lift. I figured that I would stop by his place to get a few essentials so that once he did wake up he would at least have some clean clothes to change into. I unlocked the door with my spare key and let myself into his flat which looked exactly the same as it had the last time I'd been there. I shook my head, still trying to process the fact that Cook was lying motionless in a hospital bed across town.

I took the short journey into his bedroom and shoved a few of his things into the small duffel bag I had brought with me. Satisfied with what I had picked out, I headed back into the living room to sort through some of his unread mail. I sat down heavily on the couch and started sorting through the small pile of mail I had left on the coffee table the last time I had been there. It was mostly bills and junk mail, and one postcard from a mutual friend we had met when we were in Guatemala so many years ago. I was about to get up when suddenly my attention was drawn to a small white envelope laying face down below everything else. I picked it up and flipped it over, my heart leaping in my throat as I saw "Cook" written in large red letters.

Just like the note that had been sent to me all those weeks ago.

This letter, however, was not open. I remembered that I had received my letter within the first week I knew Emily. If the stalker kept the both pattern with both of us then fuck, it had probably been a good fucking while since Cook had been here. Christ, it wasn't just me, it wasn't just Emily. Whoever it was, was trying to save both me and Cook... and stop both Effy and Emily.

I got to my feet and dashed out of Cook's flat, taking the letter with me. I didn't know why I was running, but I felt panicked... this was just getting scary. I tossed everything in my arms in the back and jumped in the car. The moment I sat down I wretched my head forward onto the steering wheel and let out a piercing shriek of frustration beforing dissolving into sobs again.

I checked the time, 4:56, still too early to meet Emily. I flicked open my phone and sent Emily a text to me at ten at the only club I knew would be busy on a Sunday night.

We needed to talk, and I now I was honestly too afraid of her to talk alone. Last night had been a moment a weakness, a last chance to curl up with the woman I loved before everything was exposed. I needed to be strong now, for myself, for Cook, and for God knows who else.

* * *

Ten o'clock rolled around and I found myself standing outside of Club Bounce. During the week, Club Bounce was a dirty, disgusting dance bar perfect for meeting slutty women and greasy guys. But on Sunday nights, they had awesome live bands and the place was always packed. I cut through the queue, unsuprised when I didn't find Emily waiting in it. I got to the front and nodded to the door man who let me in without question; he owed me a favor.

I got inside and as I anticipated, the place was packed. I was pleasantly surprised to hear that the band playing was Wintersleep. Cook and I had seen them play during our trip to Canada a few years back and we both thought they were phenomenal. My heart panged in sadness at the thought of Cook, but I quickly pushed him to the back of my mind once again. I couldn't lose focus, I was here for a reason.

And suddenly the reason I was here was in my line of vision. I saw her unmistakable bright red hair through a crowd of people close to the stage. My heart raced in my chest as I pushed my way to the crowd to meet my fate. There she was, looking just as beautiful as ever, swaying lightly in time with the music. She was wearing a tight pair of skinny jeans and a long white vest. Her long hair was hanging loosly around her shoulders and she had her head tilted back, lost in the music. She hadn't seen me yet, so I took my time, stopping short just behind her and swaying to the music with her. After a few seconds, I placed my hands lightly on her hips and pulled her back into my body. She didn't stiffin, she didn't turn, she just leaned back into me and placed her hands over mine.

She knew it was me.

My heart was beating out of my chest as we swayed together to the music, savouring the few stolen moments I had with her before the war truly started. I was terrified, and I was trying to delay the inevitable. We danced together for a few more moments before she turned in my arms to look me in the eye. The expression she wore was conflicted. She looked happy to see me, but so frightened and anxious at the same time. It was exactly how I felt.

She grabbed my hand and began pulling me through the crowd. I was so scared I thought my heart was going to stop beating. This was it, this is where I would find out if she was with me or against me. If I could trust the women that I had fallen so deeply in love with.

We pushed our way through the crowd and eventually found our way into the alley behind the club. She stood with her back to me, just inhaling, and exhaling, and I remembered that I should be doing the same. I watched her as she seemed to be having some sort of internal battle with herself before finally facing me. I was so torn. Torn between slamming her against the wall and screaming at her until she told me what she knew, and slamming her against the wall kissing the shit out of her. I guess it was always fight or fuck with us.

"Emily," I breathed, barely above a whisper. She turned to face me, her eyes filled with unshed tears and her lips quivering. She swallowed hard, regaining her compusure and took a step toward me so we were face to face.

"I know you know something is wrong.. and... and we need to talk about it now. I just can't put it off any longer."

She nodded, and I felt myself beginning to shake. I was terrified to hear the answers to my questions... terrified of the truth. But it was time.

"Emily... Cook is in the hospital. They say he's... been using."

She looked away immediately, she knew something. I could tell.

"And I know Tony is a drug dealer, and I know Effy had something to do with it."

Her eyes shot up to mine with my last statement. I could almost hear the wheels spinning in her head as she tried to figure out how I could possible know about Tony's drug dealing, or Effy's real name and involvement in Cook's disappearance. She didn't say anything, she just continued to look at me with an unreadable expression on her face, so I continued.

"Did you know about that Emily, did you know about any of this?"

She just kept looking at me, her eyes hollow and terrified. She was shaking, but she was holding herself back. I could feel her breaking. My anger boiled over as she continued to say nothing and I found myself backing her into the wall behind us. Her eyes suddenly blazed with something predatory, and she no longer looked vulnerable and terrified as we got closer to each other.

"For fucks sakes Emily," I shouted in her face, "how can you not tell me? My best fucking friend is in the hospital and he might not wake up, and it turns out that people you fucking know probably have something to do with it. Oh and to make things even fucking better, someone is fucking stalking me and telling me to stay the fuck away from you, because you're dangerous. All of this, all of these things and you don't have one fucking word to say for yourself?"

She met my ferocious gaze with hard one of her own, she didn't say a word. She was shaking, but she was doing a good job of hiding whatever it was that I was currently making her feel. She continued staring at me, giving nothing away. I swore in frustration and turned away from her, leaving her leaning against the wall alone. I could feel her eyes on me as I kicked over the trash can next to the entrance.

"Emily," I started, my voice a little softer than it had been previously," I don't know anything about you. I don't know your last name, I don't know where you live, I don't know anything about your story."

I sighed as I turned back to face her.

"I don't know you, Emily. And now, in the face of all of these things that are telling me I can't trust you, telling me I should be afraid of you... you don't have two words to defend yourself?"

My eyes bore into hers, they were cold, dark, unreadable. And she still said nothing.

"Then how do I know I can trust you?"

She took a step toward me, her eyes hardened and strong as she whispered: "you can't."

I shook my head, tears finally rolling down my cheek as I turned away from her. I felt like I couldn't breathe, everything was so wrong. There was loud crash of thunder in the air and the rain began to fall heavily around us. It smacked the ground violently, and I could feel my clothes soaking through almost immediately as I clutched my chest tightly. My heart was beating so erratically it felt like a caged animal. I could physically feel myself breaking in front of the woman I loved... the woman I couldn't trust. I wanted to crumble to the ground and just cry myself into oblivion. I wanted to close the distance between her and kiss her one last time. But all of that was over. And now, I had nothing left but anger.

"You know what, fuck you then Emily!" I screamed, taking one violent step toward her. "I thought we had something special.. I thought... I thought you loved me."

I couldn't look at her, I didn't want to try and read the reaction to the words I had just spoken on her face.

"I don't ever want to see you again," I whispered, just loud enough for her to hear.

I finally looked up to meet her gaze, and I was shocked to find the unveiled devastation lying in them. She couldn't hide how she felt at my words, and she was crushed. But that didn't change anything. Whether she loved me or not, it didn't matter. I couldn't trust her, and I needed to for this to work, especially in the face of everything I was confronting right now. The rain continued to fall around us as we stared at each other, both unwilling to give in and close the distance between us, even though it was so clearly what we both wanted more than anything in the world. But it was too much, we were obviously both on different sides of whatever it was that was happening. So we just stood there, as I struggled to force myself to walk away, and she struggled to prevent herself from stopping me.

"Stay away from me Emily, stay away from Cook..." I added, sobbing openly now. She nodded, and let out a strangled sob. It was raining so hard that I had't been able to tell she was crying until she started shaking and sobbing in front of me. I didn't ask any more questions, I wanted no more lies or silence from her. I just wanted to get away.

"If he dies, I'll kill her... and I'll take all of you down. Just know that."

With those words, I left the love of my life standing alone in an alleyway in the pouring rain, without even as much as a glance over my shoulder.

I ran. I ran so fucking hard I swore my feet would break through the pavement below my pounding feet. I was crying so hard, harder than I ever had in my life. The rainstorm was raging around me, perfectly reflecting how my heart was raging in devastation in my chest. I felt defeated, I felt like there was nothing that could possibly make this feeling go away. I reached my flat and stopped, letting my head fall back so the rain could hit me in the face. I wanted it to cleanse me, to wash away all this shit that that fucking redheaded woman had made me feel. I just wanted it to stop.

I wiped my eyes and looked down toward the entrance to see a man walking towards me.

"Naomi Campbell, we meet at last."

* * *

**...*ducks***


	14. Love And Truth

I froze as this strange man stopped short of me. I wasn't sure how to react, my system was on overload and I didn't know who I could trust right now. So I figured a douse of icy bitch would probably get him to either leave me alone, or tell me what the fuck he wanted.

"What the fuck do you want?" I asked, just as harshly as I had intended it to sound.

The man immediatly put his hands up as if he was defending himself.

"Don't worry, I'm not here to hurt you," he paused as he took in my disheveled appearance tear stained cheeks, "I see you've finally taken my advice."

"What advice..." I trailed off as I realized what he meant. The letters, the messages... his advice. This was him, the man who had been stalking me.

"It's you," I whispered just loud enough for both of us to hear. I unconsciously took a step back. Sure, this man had been trying to warn me, but that didn't mean he wasn't dangerous.

"What do you want from me?"

"I only wanted to help, Naomi."

"Yeah?" I asked, laughing somewhat mockingly at him. "And I suppose you needed to stalk me to do that?"

He shook his head, laughing at me as if what I had just said was the most absurd thing he had ever heard.

"When you've seen the things I've seen Naomi, you learn to be careful. I wanted to warn you, but I needed to know I could trust you before I revealed myself."

"Who are you?" I asked, unable to contain my curiousity any longer.

He smiled broadly at me and shook his head again. "Those answers will come later," he answered, "we have much to discuss before that. Shall we go inside?" With those words he turned away from me and headed up the steps towards my building. I still wasn't conviced however.

"Why can't you tell me now?" I asked, starting to get annoyed with all of these people keeping secrets from me all the time.

"Because I still need to be sure I can trust you, I don't want you to be able to track me down if I can't."

I nodded, it made sense afterall. He stood there staring at me as the rain continued to fall around me, waiting patiently for me to make my decision. All of the facts flew through my mind, this man had spent the last god knows how many weeks stalking me. But he had also tried to warn me away from something dangerous, and although he did look sort of ominous with his dark clothes and a hat covering his eyes, my instincts were telling me to trust him. I stepped forward and nodded at him to continue.

"Lead the way."

* * *

After I had changed into some dry clothes and made some tea, I was sitting in my living room staring awkwardly at my stalker, waiting for him to say something. He was sipping his tea quietly, looking around my apartment curiously. I was torn, because I wanted to talk to him and find out all that he knew, but I also wanted to curl up into a little ball and cry over what had happened with Emily for the next year or so. Getting agitated, I decided to break the silence.

"So what do you want to tell me?"

His eyes snapped to mine as I spoke, and he eyed me curiously. He leaned forward, placing his tea on the table and resting his elbows on his knees.

"What do you want to know?"

My answer came without hesitation.

"Everything. Everything that you know."

He nodded, leaning back in the chair once again. He took a deep breath and began.

"I'm sure you know by now that the owner of Tony's Gentleman's Club is Tony Stonem," he started, looking at me for some sort of nonverbal indication that I knew what he was talking about. I hadn't known Tony's last name, but I nodded anyway, figuring that piece of information was irrelevant. "Well, the Gentleman's Club isn't the only place Tony owns. He's got alot of other clubs in the area, The Mercury, Club Bounce, Jackie's, and a few more."

I nodded absently. Fucking hell, I hadn't realized this Tony guy was so loaded. I was starting to get nervous to find out where his story was heading.

"But what you probably don't know about Tony, is that he's a drug dealer, and not a small time one either. In fact, he supplies most of Bristol, he's the ring leader in the area if you will."

Fuck, I had seen Tony dealing that time, but I hadn't ever even considered the fact that he could be a regional crime boss. And Emily, my sweet Emily was involved with this guy. No, not my Emily anymore... but that didn't matter. It didn't mean this didn't make me terrified for her.

"Tony gets alot of business at all of his establishments... but the Gentleman's Club is sort of his baby, it was his first spot. From there he gets alot of his partners, lackies, and long term clients. Every person who walks into that fucking place gets sized up to see how they could fit in to his little drug ring."

He paused and looked at me, as if giving me a moment to prepare myself for what was coming else. I felt my heart leap in my throat. I knew what he was going to say.

"And that's where the girls come in."

Fucking hell.

"Tony's girls are a special breed. I don't know where he finds them, or how they do it, but those girls have a thrall about them and he uses it to his advantage."

He stopped again and stared at me with concern. I could barely breathe, and tears were flowing freely from my eyes. So this what this had been all about; drugs, money, doing her fucking job. Fuck, I had been so goddamn blind. How could I let myself fall in love with someone who would do that to me?

"Are you sure you want me to continue?" he asked after a long moment. I nodded ferverantly and looked him directly in the eye.

"Yes, yes please do. I need to hear this."

"Well, the girls, the ones he uses for this purpose anyway, approach someone who looks like a good target and gives them alot of attention you know... makes them think they're interested in them. Usually... this leads to a sexual relationship."

I averted my eyes as those words came out of my mouth. I was ashamed of myself, I couldn't believe that I had fallen victim to this.

"This goes on for however long it takes, and like I said I don't what it is with these girls, but their target always ends up falling in love with them. And then, is when Tony decides whether he wants a new employee, lackie, or junkie."

My whole body was shaking, I couldn't believe this. My brain kept telling me something, why hadn't anyone tried to sell me anything? But I quickly pushed that thought out of my mind, I'm sure it was coming.

"So, do you know what happened to Cook? I know you tried to warn him too.." I asked once I had managed to regain my ability to speak.

"No, I'm sorry. I couldn't track him down after that night in the club three weeks ago. He hasn't been to his place since then. But I can tell you one thing, whatever happened to him, it wasn't good."

I got to my feet and began pacing the room, unable to sit still any longer. My mind was flooding, and flailing about trying to comprehend all of the information I had been given in the last few hours.

"And Emily.." I started, almost afraid to hear the answer to my question, "she does this?"

He sighed and shook his head, "I really don't know much about her, but she's one of Tony's girls so I know she can't be trusted. That Effy girl that your mate Cook was with though... she's the worst one of them all. She's Tony's little sister, so she has his evil coursing through her veins."

I nodded, more tears slipping down my cheek as I let out a strangled sob.

"Why are you helping me? " I asked.

"Because, I need you to help me."

I stopped pacing and turned to face him.

"Help you with what?"

"I want to take them down."

My jaw almost hit the floor at his words, the idea of taking down a local crime boss was absolutely absurd. Before I could stop myself, I was laughing.

"How the fuck are we supposed to do that? We're not coppers, we're not anything."

"We're not going to do it that way," he said, his face stern, "the police have already proved that there's nothing they can do to stop Tony. I have a plan, but I need to know that you'll help me first."

I looked at him like he was fucking mad, this was getting way too crazy.

"Why are you doing this? And better yet, how do you know all of these things anyway?"

He stood abruptly, causing me to jump back in shock. He took a few steps towards me, his face hard.

"The answer to both questions... is because they did it to me."

He turned away and walked towards the couch again.

"Your mate Cook is far from the first lad to fall for the charms of Effy Stonem."

I was speechless. I felt like my brain had finally taken too much information in and was jamming up. He turned back towards me.

"I know what you're feeling all too well, Naomi. I know how it feels to find out someone you love is not what they seem. And what happened to Cook... well I understand that as well."

"I thought you said you didn't..."

"No, I don't," he countered quickly, interrupting me before I could even ask my question, "I don't know exactly what happened to Cook. But I know what they do to people when they refuse to cooperate with them anymore... when they try to get away."

I looked at him in shock, this was all too much to take in.

"You're in alot of danger right now Naomi, so you need to tell me. You're either with them or with me, and you need to make a decision. Will you help me take them down?"

I froze as I stared at him. This was well fucked up. When did I end up in some kind of fucking war? If what he was saying was true though, I was in danger. And I had a real fucking feeling that it was all true. I knew that if I wanted to keep on breathing I either had to go to Tony and offer my services, or help take him down. I didn't want to face either, but if I was forced, I knew there was only once option.

"I'll help you."

He nodded, smiling slightly before taking a few steps towards me with his hands stretched out. It seemed to be an odd gesture, before I realized what he was getting at.

"Then perhaps I should introduce myself. Naomi Campbell, I'm Freddie McClair, pleased to make your acquantiance."

* * *

**Dun dun dun... seriously, who expected that? Really, hands up if you did.**

**I'm not too sure about this chapter, I'm kind of half asleep right now... but I think I got across what I needed to. And now for the part you won't like... I have to take a four day hiatus from this story. Not long, I know, but I will be very busy this weekend so I won't get a new chapter up until Tuesday. But this slightly bad news comes with two pieces of good news!**

**The first, is that I intend on having this story finished by Wednesday, May 12th. I'm going on a month long adventure starting the next day, so I will be putting a MAJOR push on finishing it by then.**

**The second, is that included with this chapter is "chapter 15" which is a little soundtrack I made for this story. I recommend reading it, because it offers insights into the story and characters... and I put alot of work into it :).**

**Anyway, that's all, please review and let me know what you all think!**

**Cheers - fg**


	15. Soundtrack not chapter!

This is (non) chapter 15, the little interlude I promised before I go on a three/four day hiatus. I've gotten so into this story the last few days I'm afraid I might go crazy without it haha. But, this couldn't come at a better time, the stalker has been revealed, as well as the truth about the club... but there are still many twists and turns left to come for Naomi. Plus, what will become of her and Emily? Who knows... I do... but that's besides the point :).

Anyway, as I mentioned doing earlier in the story, here is the soundtrack to this story. I'll call it Volume 1, because I'll probably post the songs from the second half of the story at the end! All of this music has helped me write so much, and I think by posting them I can kind of help you guys see things the way I see things and get a better insight into the story. Not all of these songs have appeared in the story, and I'm not including every song I've mentioned in it either. I will say though, that the title of every chapter is a song that reflects the overall content of the chapter, so if you'd like to check those out as well I recommend all of them very highly. Anyway, enjoy!

**Electric Feel – MGMT: **Pretty much a no brainer. This song is where the title, and concept sort of came from. Seriously, I mean what about this story is not encompassed in this song? In my mind, this song is everywhere in this story, although so far it has only actually appeared in chapter two during the ipod fiasco. This song is extremely sexually charged, but it's also about meeting someone that makes you feel out of control. That's what this story is about after all. When you look at it at first, it seems like it will be all about lust and sex, but really it's about so much more than that. For me, the electricity symbolizes the idea of being able to look but not touch, or to apply it more directly to this story, touch but not know. The electricity is both the attractor and the barrier between Emily and Naomi. It will continue to appear throughout the story.

_Plug it in and change the world_

_You are my electric girl_

**Stolen – Dashboard Confessional: **Okay, I know this song is totally a cliche, but that doesn't change the fact that it fits perfectly with our girls in this story. I've never seen this song as a straight forward love song, I've always thought it was more complicated than it seems at first listen. Obviously, it's about meeting someone who knocks the wind out of you when you least expect it. But there's a desperation in this song, almost like it's begging someone to stay. I think both Emily and Naomi feel their hearts have been stolen by the other, regardless of what's happening right now. This song represents the desperation and passion they have shown for each other throughout the story. But more than that, I think they would have shouted these lyrics to each other at the top of their lungs in that alleyway in chapter thirteen.

_Watch you spin around in your highest heels_

_You are the best one, of the best ones_

_We all look like we feel_

_You have stolen my heart_

**Promises – Morning Benders: **Great song, from a great album, from one of my favorite bands (they're one of Naomi's favorites in the story as well). This song appears in chapter seven when Naomi is driving around trying to get her head together after learning a bit more about Emily. This song is about nothing being what it seems, about how fragile everything can be. I think that's pretty self-explanatory.

_I can't help thinking we grew up too fast_

_I know, I know that this won't last_

_A second longer than it has_

**A Cold Night Close To The End – Said The Whale: **Another of my favorite bands, Canadian of course like many of the other bands on here. This song appears in chapter nine when Naomi and Emily make love after waking up together. This is a song about survival, about staying together no matter what else happens. In this chapter, they made a promise to each other that they have yet to succeed at keeping. We'll have to see if they will later on ;).

_And if we are to die tonight_

_I pray in your heart that you'll love me forever_

_And at least we will leave here together_

**Feel It In My Bones – Tiesto ft. Tegan and Sara: **This one is pretty straight forward. It appears in chapter six as Emily and Naomi are driving through the countryside. I'm sure you're all relatively familiar with this song, and therefore understand why I've included it. This song to me is about love hitting you hard and fast, and before you even know what's happening... you feel it in your bones.

_Blow by blow, I didn't see it coming_

_Blow by blow, sucker punch_

**Here (In Your Arms) – Hellogoodbye: **The title song to chapter four. This song, in my opinion, may be the most romantic song ever written. I could hear this song playing in my head in the scene in Naomi's bedroom when Naomi first saw behind Emily's mask. Everything about this song screams desperate love, and it happening quickly. Emily waltzed into Naomi's life and knocked her off her feet... but since the story is from Naomi's point of view you don't know how it was for Emily. I do though. So just listen to this song and think about that for a while :).

_You are the one, the one who lies close to me_

_Whispers hello, I miss you quite terribly_

_I fell in love, in love with you suddenly_

_Now there's no place else I could be but here in your arms_

**Walk Away - Ben Harper: **Another cliche, perhaps, but no song better describes the dilemma faced by Naomi and Emily in this story. This song is about how, if you love someone, sometimes you need to let them go. I won't say too much more about this, instead I'll let you think about the implications of the fact that I chose this song.

_They say if you love somebody then you have to set them free_

_But I would rather be locked to you than in live this pain and misery_

_They say time will make all this go away_

_But time has taken my tomorrows and turned them to yesterdays_

**Marching Bands of Manhatten – Death Cab For Cutie: **This song is basically a beautiful, long winded way of saying: "I'll do anything for you, even if it kills me." It's about fighting for someone, even though you love them much, it could kill you. I'll say nothing else on this one.

_Sorrow drips into your heart through a pinhole_

_Just like a faucet that leaks, and there is comfort in the sound_

_And while you debate half empty or half full_

_It slowly rises, your love is gonna drown_

**Poster Of A Girl – Metric**: Metric are an extremely awesome Canadian band that I have mad love for, and the lyrics to this song are in half french, half english... and get pretty graphic at times. This song doesn't appear anywhere in the story, but I sort of think of it as Naomi's anthem. It's a very sexually charged song, and its sexuality is the first thing you notice about it, much like with Naomi and Emily's relationship. But when you look deeper, there is alot more there. There's a line in it: je sais que n'aimes pas ta realite, which translates to I know you don't like your reality. Naomi is in the position that she is because she settled into a life that she didn't want in the first place, so when Emily came along everything from there on in just exploded. This song is about the difference between who you are, and who you want to be. And I think that this is a main struggle for Naomi in her life, her romance with Emily, and the situation she's found herself in now.

_Looking on the bright side_

_When there is no bright side_

_Cumming in your pants_

_For the off chance_

_With a poster of a girl_

**Madder Red – Yeasayer:** This song by Scottish band Yeasayer, does not appear in the story itself, but it is without a doubt Emily's anthem . Emily is an extremely complex character in this story, more so than anyone really realizes at this point. Most of what everyone reads is about Naomi, because it's from her point of view. But nobody knows this Emily like I do,I know who and what she is, I know the answers to the questions, I know her motivations, I know why. Every lyric to this song screams Emily, from the refrain "It's getting harder to keep pretending I'm worth your time," to the constant repitition of the words "please don't ask me why," to even the title. This song is about the constant struggle with yourself, whether you're good enough or not. It's about loving someone, but sometimes there are bigger things than love. Emily remains a mystery to you all at this point, so I encourage you to listen to this song so you can perhaps begin to understand her better.

_Never gave a thought to an honorable living_

_Always had sense enough to lie_

_It's getting harder to keep pretending, I'm worth your time_

_Because lately, I have wronged you, and not been on your side love_

_Maybe I've been dumb, please don't ask me why_

**Dead Letter-Wintersleep: **I'm sure you've noticed, considering I've mentioned them several times in this story that I love this band. Another Canadian one, of course, gotta represent for my country. I've used several of their songs in this story: Laserbeams in the scene where Naomi sees Emily giving that guy a lap dance, Danse Macabre was the song they danced to together before their falling out, and was the title of chapter thirteen. But Dead Letter, was the song I imagined playing during their confrontation and ultimate breakup. This song is really just exquisitely written, and it speaks to me every time I hear it. The song is about the destructive nature of the human mind, our own abilities to sabotage ourselves. I don't think I need to explain why this applys to both Emily and Naomi.

_I think it's coming and it comes so fast_

_I'm hearing whispers of an infinite yes_

_And I don't know why it is_

_Our bodies are dead, why do you look so sad?_

So there it is, a few songs for you guys to listen to during my short absence. See you Tuesday!


	16. Evil Woman

**Hey everyone! I'm back from my awesomely horrible four day vacation during which I got about a total of five hours of sleep. But now that's over and the final push to finish this story before I leave is on. Expect rapid updates for the next 8 days, because there is actually still alot left to this story. Also, congrats to anyone who guessed the stalker was Freddie before the last chapter(because lets face it, it got pretty obvious when he started talking about Effy, but before that I don't think it was :)), you have very good sleuthing skills. If you have any more guesses as to what;s coming next, I would love to hear them :) **

**This one goes out to the people who commented on and appreciated my soundtrack! Specifically jaxicen for our mutual love of Canadian music and Broken Social Scene :)**

**And also, to LuvActually. Congradulations on finishing Coin Laundry, it was truly something awesome.**

* * *

There are so many mornings in your life when your eyes open, and as you shake off the remnants of sleep you realize that everything is so much different today than it was yesterday. Whether it was the morning after you lose your mother, or your virginity to the beautiful girl you'd been eyeing up for ages, sometimes waking up makes you realize things have changed more than you could have anticipated. This morning, when I woke up everything had changed. The game was a new one, and I wasn't sure how ready I was to face it. All the events of yesterday seemed to come back to me in a distant blur, but the feelings those memories invoked in me were so prevalent that I couldn't fool myself into believing it was all some horrible nightmare.

I had ended things with Emily, and found out that I done so for good reason.

I felt tears spring to my eyes as I remembered all of the horrible things Freddie had revealed to me. She had used me. She had used me in the most terrible way possible, not only for her own benefit but for the benefit of a truly evil man. As far as I was concerned, Tony Stonem was the devil. Not only had he caused my best mate to end up in a hospital bed fighting for his life, but he had placed the girl of my dreams before me and ordered her to make me feel happier than I had ever felt in my life for his personal benefit. And the worst part was, I knew he wasn't intending to make an employee; he wanted to make me a user. And Emily, the woman I had fallen so deeply in love with that the world seemed to stop spinning when I was in her presence, had been a willing participant.

I may have been the one who finished it in the end, but it was Emily who ripped my still beating heart out of my chest and carelessly tossed it away. It was Emily who had decieved and used me time and time again, while simultaneously making me believe that she really felt the same way about me as I did about her. And even after all of that, she still had the gall to looked devastated when I had finally walked away, leaving her standing alone in the pouring rain. She was a con artist, an actress so brilliant she could decieve even the cleverst of people. Tony Stonem was the devil, and Emily was nothing but one of his decietful demons.

I felt so stupid to have fallen for her tricks. But I felt even more stupid for the fact that even after all of this, I still loved her. I had left my heart with her in that alleyway, and she had tossed it aside as if it were a piece of meaningless rubbish. And it would stay there, beating a solitary rhythm. I had given her my heart, and it would continue to beat for her and her alone, even if she never returned to claim it.

I took some comfort in the fact that I wasn't the only one who had fallen for the charms of one of Tony Stonem's secret weapons. The horror stories Freddie had told me of his and Effy's tempestuous love affair brought me to tears. He understood, he really did, and I was so thankful that he had come along to try and save me as well. Effy had turned him into a user, a pathetic shell of who he was before he met her that would have practically sold his soul to get a fix. When he had finally come to his senses and tried to clean himself up, he was beaten to within an inch of his life. They had left him for dead.

But Freddie had survived, unbeknowst the Stonem clan and their brethren. He had spent the better part of the last three years lurking in the shadows, always sure he wasn't being seen. He had found out all of the secrets of Tony's operations, and the truth of just how deceptive Effy had been. My heart hurt as he struggled to keep his voice steady when he recounted the day he'd discovered that he had never truly had Effy's heart. The day he realized that she had been playing him and upwards of six other men in order to ensure her brother's business thrived. He had been shattered, broken beyond repair by the one girl he had ever loved. And now, the only thing he had left was his thirst for revenge.

He hadn't revealed his plan to me just yet, but he did tell me that he had been working with a few Bristol police officers that had also been helping him stay hidden for the past three years. Apparently, one of them was one of his old mates from college, so the group of them were working under the radar for now. I wasn't sure what it was they could possibly be planning or how I fit into the mix, Tony Stonem would not be an easy man to bring down. From what Freddie had told me, he had connections everywhere, including people in very high places. People had tried to take him down before, and they had always failed. And then, they ended up dead.

And because of that very scary fact, Freddie had left me a .44 caliber revolver to keep on me at all times. Never had I been more thankful for my experiences in South America all those years ago. I knew how to shoot a fucking gun, it wasn't something I was proud of, but if it was going to save my life I would do whatever was necessary. Tony Stonem hadn't got to me, but Emily knew that I knew more than I should and that made me a target.

Despite what I knew about the dangers of Tony Stonem, however, Freddie had assured me that they had a solid plan. Apparently, there was someone on the inside who had decided to come forward to help them. This knowledge made me hopeful for a brief moment that perhaps Emily was a good guy afterall. But I quickly remembered that Freddie would not have warned me away from her so vehementely if she were one of the good guys.

I finally dragged myself out of bed, realizing it was Monday and that no matter how shitty of a day I was having, I still had to go to work. I jumped in the shower and cringed as the hot water hit my skin. My tears comingled with the hot water running down my face as I allowed myself to have my one and only breakdown for the day. I sobbed loudly, and I knew the sounds were resonating through my flat. A fact that only succeeded in reminding me just how alone I really was. The only person I could count on right now was a mysterious stranger that I barely knew. But the woman I loved had turned out to be a deceptive lying bitch, and my best mate was lying in a hospital bed across town, so I didn't have much of a choice but to trust Freddie. Really, right now he was all I had.

* * *

My work day passed by with a blur, as it always seemed to these days. Sometimes I envied people who loved their jobs and based their lives around their careers. My job was such a secondary part of my existence, I felt like I barely mentioned it. I had never been happy at work. The only time I had ever really enjoyed what I was doing was when I was building schools and working at orphanages all over the world with Cook by my side, and writing epic articles about our journeys. Those had been the days. Cook and I, carefree, no attachments but to ourselves, each other, and our mutual desire to help people. We had met and fucked woman from every corner of the earth, and we had never looked back. And now, just three years later, it was our attachments to two devastaingly gorgeous women that got us in this horrible mess.

I jumped in my car and began driving across the city to see Cook at the hospital. He had been in a coma for two days now, and I was starting to get worried. I had studied arts at university, but I knew enough about medecine to know that the longer someone is in a coma, the lesser their chance of waking up. Sure, it had only been two days, but it had seemed like so much more than that. I needed Cook to wake up, I needed him to be there and help me in my time of need. I needed to know what happened to him so that my desire for revenge could spark a new flame. Because despite all that Emily had done to me, my current flame was flickering.

Sure, I wanted to bring the evil Tony Stonem, his evil sister, and their evil band of drug lords down. But I wasn't sure I wanted to watch Emily burn. Fuck it, I knew I didn't want to watch her burn. I could still feel her on every inch of my skin. When I inhaled, I could still smell her scent lingering in the air around me. The electric current that had connected us to each other was still vibrating, I could still feel her in my bones. She was everywhere and nowhere at the same time.

I was disappointed when I arrived at the hospital to find no change in Cook's condition. On the otherhand, I was happy to learn that he was healing up nicely and that hopefully it was only a matter of time before he rejoined us. As the doctor lead me down the dark corrider towards Cook's room, he informed me that he had discovered Cook also had several broken ribs. Sounded like the work of Tony Stonem to me.

When I entered the room, the first thing I noticed was a single, long stemmed red rose laying on the bed next to Cook's hand. I reached for it immediately and brought it to my nose, inhaling lightly.

"Who brought this?" I asked, honestly wondering who else would come by to visit Cook. I wasn't lying when I said we never really had anything but each other.

As soon as the words escaped my lips, an older nurse walked into the room.

"There was a little girl with bright red hair by about an hour ago," she answered, completely oblivious to the stunned look my face was currently sporting.

My mind raced; why the fuck would Emily visit Cook?


	17. Naive

**Hey everyone. I know I promised rapid updates, so sorry this one was a little slow. But man, I had a serious case of writer's block with this one! First time ever on this story, really I must have rewritten it a hundred different ways. I'm finally satisfied with the content so I suppose i'll hand it over, even though I still don't think it's that great. It's just a bit of filler, the next one will be more exciting I promise. **

**This one is for Kooksgirl89, for the lovely message and the awesome music taste. And her awesome story, which you should all check out by the way. And... also because the title of this chapter is a Kooks song. Wow I had alot of good reasons to dedicate this one, haha.**

**Enjoy.**

The rest of the week passed by fairly quickly, and before I knew it, it was Friday again. Even though I had had a relatively quiet week, I felt exhausted. It didn't make sense really, because all I had done was go to work, run my usual errands, visit Cook in hospital and speak to Freddie either in person or on the phone every night. By all appearances, I should have been geared up for the weekend with a ton of expendable energy, but my mind was completely drained. Completely drained by the constant obsessing over Emily I had been doing.

That fucking red head just wouldn't leave me alone. She was everywhere I turned, invading every one of my senses to the point that I felt completely overwhelmed by her presence. Yet, she wasn't anywhere near me, and I missed her so fucking badly I felt like a part of me had been torn away. It was all I could do not to call her just to hear her voice, or to go to the club just to see her. It was irrational to be feeling this way after how much she had hurt me, but I couldn't help it. Some insane part of me was still hoping that by bringing down Tony, I would be somehow saving her. That she would thank me, and throw herself into my arms and explain everything in a perfectly rational manner. Then we could run off into the sunset and live happily ever after in each other arms.

Very bloody likely.

When I wasn't obsessing about wanting to be with her, I was obsessing about the things she had done. The most current of her strange actions being the rose she left at Cook's bedside. It could have meant alof things, I suppose. When I first told Freddie about it, I was terrified that he was going to tell me it was Tony's "kiss of death" and that Cook was in even more danger than before. But I was relieved to hear that he had never heard of Tony doing anything like that, which meant that the rose was all Emily. Maybe she felt guilty after all, like maybe she should have done something to stop Cook from ending up like that. Or worse, maybe she was apologizing for what was about to happen to him. Or worse yet, it was her own personal "kiss of death," and she was secretly some kind of stripper, drug pusher, assasin triple threat at Tony Stonem's disposal. In any other situation, pursuing that line of thought would have seemed ludicrious. But in this situation, well, anything was possible.

There was one possibility that I didn't want to face though, and that was that she had left the rose for me. I knew it was possible, because she knew I would go to visit Cook, so in a way it was a way of reaching me without having to step directly into my life. But what did she mean by it?

It was around 6pm, and I was pacing my apartment, my finger on the call button over Emily's name for what felt like the millionth time this week. I wouldn't call, I knew I couldn't call, but it was a fucking struggle every time not to.

I tossed my phone on the table, backing away from it as if it were a ticking time bomb. I sat down heavily on my couch, still staring at my phone as if it were about to jump up and attack me. I was finally startled out of my paranoia by the sound my buzzer. I rushed over to it and quickly clicked to intercom button.

"Who's there?"

"It's me, you ready?" Freddie's voice replied.

I clicked the buzzer again to let Freddie know I would be right down and went to gather my things for our meeting. Freddie had arranged for us to meet the big scary coppers that had been helping us in the back of some grubby pub in downtown Bristol. I was beginning to feel like some sort of sketchy undercover spy. But a part of me knew this had to be done, not only for myself, Freddie, and the rest of fucking Bristol, but for Cook.

I sighed as I thought of my best mate. All week there had been no change in his condition, even though the doctors kept assuring me that he could wake up at any moment. I was terrified that they weren't being honest with me just to keep my hope alive. I just couldn't face the idea of living without Cook. I had fucked up. Well, we had both fucked up and completely ignored each other after meeting our succubus she-devil strippers, but I knew once he woke up that that wouldn't matter. For so long, Cook had been the only constant in my life. I wanted him to be a part of this; I wanted him to help take Tony down. But more than that, I needed him to be okay.

Freddie and I zipped through the streets of Bristol in his black sedan before finally parking in front of a dirty looking bar that looked like it shouldn't even be open, let alone serving food. I cringed a little, but Freddie had informed me that we needed to go to a quiet, dark place that wouldn't have many people around. Well, I had to admit, if that was what he was looking for he had hit the mark with this dive.

The moment I stepped into the pub I had to supress a gag. Jesus fucking christ, how was this place still operating? Every inch of the place was covered in some form of dirt and the smell was so overwhelming I almost passed out. I swear I could hear the rats running around in the ceiling, even over the grungy rock music that was playing in the background.

Freddie led me through the club to the back where there were three people waiting for us in a secluded booth that looked slightly cleaner than the rest of the place.

"Naomi," Freddie said as we reached the table, "meet three of Bristol's finest."

"Blimin' heck Naomi, it's so good finally meet you," shrieked the increasingly mad looking blonde girl that had suddenly jumped to her feet to shake my hand furiously. "Name's Pandora, but everyone calls me Panda. Been mates with Freddie since we were in six form, inn'at right Freds?"

"That's right Panda," Freddie responded, smiling a kind smile at the odd woman still shaking my hand. She finally let go and sat back down, scooting over so that I could fit into the sticky booth.

"This is JJ and Thomas," Freddie said, gesturing to the other two occupants of the booth once I had sat down.

"Oh sorry!" Panda suddenly yelled, causing me to jump back a little bit, "I can be so absent. Jay here says I'm like a runaway train when I get going. Jay's my boyfriend," she added, pointing to the curly haired boy seated next to her, "isn't he a blinkin' dream?"

I nodded absently, these were two of Bristol's finest? JJ looked so fucking timid that he would probably be scared off by a butterfly, and Panda seemed to be just a few coins short of a looney bin.

"I can tell you are questioning them," I heard a deep voice chirp in. I looked over at the dark man who I assumed to be Thomas and found him glancing at me with a look of amusement.

"No, no I wasn't."

"It's okay," he cut me off, "they are different, that I know. Sometimes I feel like a father to those two. But I assure you, it is our quirks that make us the best."

"Well, statistically speaking," JJ piped in, speaking for the first time, "the likelihood of us actually being the best is very small. Considering the fact that there are approximately 125,645 police officers in this country alone, the statistical probability of us actually ranking higher than all of them is really rather low."

My mouth was hanging open in shock, was Freddie really serious about these people? Freddie seemed to sense that my apprehension had not been quelled and began to laugh lightly.

"Don't worry Naomi, they really are quite good. JJ here is a technical and mathmatical genius, Thomas has got more strength, speed and natural ability than anyone else on the force, and Panda is the best undercover agent they've got."

Again, my mouth hung open in shock. But I suppose I didn't have a choice but to believe them, they were all I had right now. That's when it suddenly hit me, I knew Panda from somewhere. My mind suddenly flashed back to the first night I had spent at Tony's club. I had seen her there! I distinctly remembered her giving a lap dance to one of Cook's cousins right before I ran off with Emily. Fucking hell, she had been working undercover this whole time. Maybe I was underestimating her.

"It's just bloody brill that you're going to help us, Naomi," Panda said, smiling manically and breaking me from my thoughts.

"Glad to do it," I replied with a smile, "so what's the plan?"

* * *

We spent the next few hours discussing plans and the evidence they had already compiled against Tony. The three coppers told me that they were keeping this a secret from the rest of the police force for now. Apparently Tony had some friends in high places within the Bristol Police Department, so revealing anything before It was an absolute sure thing that Tony would be caught was not a wise decision. Fucking bastard, that Tony.

When they told me what the plan was, I was a little shocked at first. Their inside source had informed them that Tony, the sociopathic bastard, kept what he called a "memory box." Despite how meticulously careful he was, Tony was so arrogant that he kept a record of all of his greatest hits so that he could go back through them. A fucking morbid, psychopathic trip down memory lane if you will. They were mostly photographs, but he also kepy chipped teeth, videos, copies of death certificates… the man was really well and truly fucked up. If we could get him on even one of the multiple murders documented in that box, Tony Stonem would be fucked and everything else coming crashing down around him would only be a matter of time.

The problem was that the box was of course, extremely heavily guarded at Tony's club. Without the help of the infortmant, who I was informed was one of the few people who actually knew about the box, they probably would have never even known it existed, let alone get an opportunity to steal it. So the coppers, Freddie, and their inside informant had a plan that, admittedly, was well thought out. But it was going to take a hell of a lot of team work to pull it off. Basically, they would steal the memory box and then Freddie would anonymously leave it for JJ at the Bristol Police Department. But getting the box, that would be the tricky part. That, was where Panda, the mysterious informant, and I would come in. They hadn't told me the exact details, but I was imagining we would be going all "mission impossible."

The craziest part though, was what they had planned for the aftermath. Freddie had somehow arranged to have all of us flown off to some undisclosed location to wait out the immediate aftermath of Tony's downfall. They needed enough time to bring Tony's whole operation down, and he still had friends in high places even behind bars. So, it was a very high chance that at least one of them would end up dead if we stuck around in Bristol for two long. So myself, Freddie, JJ, Panda, and the mysterious informant would take off while the dust settled and leave Thomas and the rest of the Bristol PD to deal with our evidence.

They hadn't told me who the informant was, which was admittedly driving me absolutely crazy. But I understood, whoever the informant was, was putting themselves in great danger to help us. Hell, even Freddie only met them in person two weeks ago. Despite all that, my brain was screaming at me that I had to find out. I was still naively holding out hope that it was Emily who was helping us, that she wanted to bring her evil boss down just as badly as I did. But I somehow knew my hope was in vain. It would probably be some random person I hadn't even noticed around before.

I decided to take an early leave and told Freddie not to worry about getting me home. As I was leaving, Freddie smiled warmly at me and told me the informant would be revealed to me before I knew it. I smiled politely at the other three and made my exit.

It was just after 11:00 when I stepped into the cool night air. I quickly hailed a cab and we started off towards my flat. On the way there, the driver was idiotic enough to drive me past Tony's fucking gentleman's club, as if I didn't have enough fucking problems. My eyes were glued to it, almost as if I expected Emily to appear in the doorway and wave me over. I sighed and turned away, repeating to myself over and over again that she was bad news. When we had finally cleared the street, I elt out a huge breath of relief. Another tempation beaten.

After that, the cab ride seemed to go by in a blur, and before I knew it I was standing outside my flat door fumbling with my keys to get it open. I finally got in open stepped in, silmutaneously yawning and flicking on the light. As soon as the light filled the room, I realized I wasn't alone.

"What the fuck are you doing here?"


	18. Passive

She stood from the place she was seated on my couch the moment my voice cut through the silent air. Emily's sister Katie. Why the fuck would she be in my apartment? I eyed up her up and down for a moment, my hand unconsiously slipping down towards the gun I had holstered to my hip. Fuck, she looked like Emily. I felt like falling to my knees and hugging her body to my chest. I knew she wasn't Emily, but they were so similar and I was missing her so fucking badly that I could pretend… just for a moment. But I knew better, and I stood my ground. She looked a little startled by my entrance, and her stance was not an opposing one. Although I knew I probably should have, I didn't feel afraid of her.

"I'm sorry Naomi," she stuttered out after a long moment, "it's just, the door wasn't locked and I needed to speak with you."

The door wasn't locked? Fucking christ, I was going to get myself killed before I remembered to lock that thing. Most people lock their doors whenever they leave, but I can't manage to lock mine when there is quite possible a sociopathic drug lord out to get me.

"What are you doing here, Katie?" I asked finally, trying to keep my voice as steady as possible.

"I want you to give my sister another chance," she responded immediately.

I looked at her dumbfounded for a long moment before breaking into a fit of bitter laughter.

"Get out Katie," I answered pointedly once I had stopped laughing.

" You don't understand, Naomi. Emily needs someone like you in her life," Katie continued anyway, taking a defiant step towards me, "and I know you love her."

I took a deep breath, once again trying to keep my voice steady as I prepared to respond.

"Frankly Katie, what's love got to do with it?"

She scoffed and looked at me pointedly.

"Don't give me that shit, It's got everything to do with it, Naomi."

"Yeah well, there's a big difference between loving someone and being able to trust them," I responded with as little emotion in my voice as I could manage. I moved passed Emily's increasingly agitated looking twin and walked toward my kitchen. Katie walked over and shut the door that I had left wide open. Fucking hell, I really had to learn how to shut that thing. I'd have hobos and thieves walking straight into the place before I even knew what was happening.

"Naomi," Katie started, walking towards where I was now leaning against the counter, "I know how Emily can be, she isn't perfect. In fact, I know she's well fucked up. But she's been through a lot, and trust me, she has her reasons for being the way she is."

I looked away and felt my stomach clenching. None of this made sense. If Emily was only with me for Tony and the club, why was her sister here fighting for me on her behalf.

"Why are you doing this, Katie?" I asked, unable to quell my curiousity.

"Because," she breathed, turning away from me, "Emily has done a lot for me… I owe her. And, I think you can help me get her… get us… out of that place."

"You want to get out?" I asked confused. Then suddenly it struck me. Katie wanted out, was it possible that she was the one helping Freddie and his gang of unusual, misfit coppers? I was suddenly hit with an overwhelming flare of hope, and before I knew it the words were flying out of my mouth like verbal diarrhea.

"Katie, does the name Freddie McClair mean anything to you?"

She froze. She slowly turned back to face me, her face wearing a look of both shock and fear. She looked like a deer in headlights.

"How do you know Freddie?"

"You're the informant, aren't you Katie," I said, stepping towards her. She took a step back, almost as if she were afraid of me, making me realize that I should perhaps identify myself as being on her side.

"Don't worry Katie, I'm on your side. In fact, Freddie has been anonymously warning me to stay away from your sister since I met her."

Her mouth dropped in shock and she shook her head in disbelief. I walked toward the couch and sat down heavily, gesturing Katie to join me. She sat down and told me about when she met Pandora and how after a few months of knowing each other, Panda had inquired if Katie ever thought about getting out of the business. Apparently, Tony was not too keen on letting his employees go, and Katie had confided in Panda that if Tony ever let her, she'd be gone in an instant. It was then, Panda had decided that she was a good target for an informant, and luckily Katie had been on board. They had been working together on bringing Tony down ever since.

"Does Emily know any of this?" I asked after she had finished her story.

"No.. she doesn't…."

"Why didn't you tell her?"

"Because I wanted to protect her," she said pointedly,, "you have no idea how dangerous Tony is. At least if this whole thing blew up in my face… she would still be safe."

I looked at Katie for a long moment and I felt a small twinge of emotion rise up in my chest. This girl obviously loved her sister dearly, to the point that she would do anything for her. I realized this was my chance, my chance to possibly find out more about the woman that had turned my world upside down. There were so many questions I wanted to ask, I just hoped she was willing to give me some answers

"Do you think Emily wants to get out?"

"I really don't know," Katie sighed, "Emily and I are close, but we don't really talk about things like that. I know she trusts me, but she can be so closed off sometimes."

I nodded, urging her to continue. I knew all too well what she was saying.

"I guess I just always assumed when she found out she would be ecstatic… but if Freddie was warning you off her… he might know something he didn't want to tell me."

She seemed broken by her realization, but it paled in comparison to how I was feeling. I felt like my last ounce of hope was being drained from my body.

"No, it can't be true."

Katie stood abruptly and began pacing the room. I watched her battle with herself, still unable to speak with the knowledge that Emily really was, most likely, one of the bad guys.

"I know her, Naomi," she said, turning to face me, "Emily has always been there for me, I know she would leave that place if I asked her to."

She sat back down on the couch, taking both of my hands in hers, and she looked me straight in the eye.

"Naomi, I know things are difficult between you two right now, but she I know she cares about you. She's been a complete mess all week… if she won't leave that place for me, I know she'll leave for you."

I shook my head, feeling the tears well up in my eyes. This was too much.

"Katie, I will help you, I will bring Tony down… but Emily's business is not mine."

I was shocked then when she slapped me, hard. My cheek burned and I stared at her in shock as she broke down in tears.

"Of course it's your fucking business, Naomi. You love her."

"I know I love her," I screamed back at her," I know I love her because she ripped me to pieces. She gave me reason after reason not to trust her Katie. I'm not going to risk blowing this whole thing to save her when we can't trust her."

"We can trust her Naomi, just give me a chance to talk to her, give her a chance! Emily is a good person! Do you have any idea how much she was risking every time she was with you? How much she risked to get close to you? You've gotten closer to her than anyone else ever has Naomi, don't you realize that?"

I looked away, tears overflowing onto my cheeks as Emily's furious twin continued to scream at me. I couldn't handle this, there was too much information flying from every direction.

"You may think she didn't trust you, but she gave you more of herself than she's ever given anyone else. I know her, and I know things might look bad, but I have to have enough faith in my sister to know that she'll help us. That she wants to get out of there."

I buried my head in my hands, rubbing my eyes furiously to trying and make the tears subside. Eventually I looked up to find Katie staring back at me expectantly, and I could feel my resolve crumbling.

"Okay, Katie… if you need it, I will help you convince her."

"Can I tell her she can come see you?"

I froze at her question. Was it really a good idea for me to see her right now? Even if Emily was one of the good guys, she had still hurt me badly. She could have opened herself up to me, trusted me, but she didn't. I knew I wouldn't be able to control myself well enough if we saw each other now, so I knew what my answer had to be.

"No, Katie, that's not a good idea."

Katie smiled sympathetically, and shook her head, surprising me with a small laugh.

"I know what you think of Emily right now after all that's happened between you, but I swear to you everything she did or didn't tell you was for a reason."

"How can you be so sure?" I asked before I stopped myself.

She just looked at me for a long moment, before reaching the hem of her top and lifting her shirt up slightly. With the material removed I saw a long scar running along the lower part of her stomach.

"Did you ever wonder why Emily strips and I don't?"

I nodded absently, still staring at her exposed skin.

"Well, when we first started, I was the stripper and Emsy worked the bar. It wasn't the greatest job, but I didn't mind it. Em hated it though, she hated seeing me like that, she hated the club, she hated everything. She came so close to quitting so many times, and then... I got diagnosed with ovarian cancer.

My eyes shot up to Katie's face.

"After I got the surgery, I was left with this scar. So Tony told me I couldn't strip anymore. They were going to kick us out and we didn't have anywhere else to go… so Emily…" she trailed off when her voice broke. I couldn't believe it, Emily had really done that for her sister when she hated it so much. She hated her job. Everytime I had seen her working, she seemed like such a natural I always just assumed she didn't mind it, but I suppose there are alot of things people can fake.

Katie pulled her shirt down and took a step towards me.

"You might not see it now, but I believe in her. I hope you will again too."

And before I could get another word out, she disappeared through the door.

I took a step backwards until my knees connected with the couch, collapsing into a confused heap. Fucking hell, I needed to stop being so overloaded with information. My brain was seriously going to explode.

Just then, my phone buzzed in my pocket causing me to jump almost a mile in the air. I took it out and check the caller id, unknown number. I picked it up.

"Hello?"

"_Naomi Campbell?"_

_"_Yes...?"

_"I'm calling from Bristol General, it's about James Cook..."_

* * *

Okay, so I got this chapter tonight as promised, but I'm not really satisfied with it. I hit alot of plot points and I'm not entirely satisfied with my delivery... luckily there is more to come. I know I promised rapid updates, but I've been doing a hell of alot of travelling the last few days so I apologize. I'm starting to feel like I live in airports. This story is not going to be finished by May 12th as I originally intended, but I will get one more update in before then which will explain this whole situation more.

No Emily in this chapter, but I hope the glimmer of hope that Katie gave you all will suffice.

She WILL be in the next one.

Until then...


	19. Eyes On Fire

**Hey everyone. So I'm back. I'm terribly sorry about leaving this for so long, but I have a really good excuse. I spent the better part of the last six weeks doing volunteer work in Central America. I had really meant to get up this chapter before I left, but I never had the time to write it. But I'm back now, and I have a bunch of free time over the next couple of weeks so I'm hoping to update regularly once again. So here is the latest chapter, which is kind of short, accompanying this ridiculously long authors note.**

**This chapter was the hardest one I've ever written. I'm asking you all to keep your faith in me, because once again, it was always going to go here. I have to the rest of the story planned out, so hang on for the ride.**

**A few things before we get into the story once again. I've been playing catch up with alot of my favorite stories and with some awesome new ones the last few days and I've noticed some things on here that I really haven't liked. This habit of writing unjust reviews and flaming authors has really set me off a little bit, so I am echoing the concerns of many other authors on this site. I think everyone on here is smart enough to understand the difference between constructive criticism and just plain being a giant asshole. If you need a little help, here's an example.**

**Bad: This story makes no sense, I have no idea why you're writing it. Also, were you born in Japan? Because your English is so bad that it couldn't possibly be your first language.**

**Good: I really like where you're going with this story, it's an awesome concept and I'm really enjoying reading it. However, I think you could benefit from reading it over a few more times before posting, you're making a few mistakes here and there. **

**There, that's not so hard is it? If you can't say something constructive, just don't say it. There's no need in bringing an author down just because you don't like their story. Plus, when you discourage them and they stop writing, it ruins it for the readers that do enjoy their writing. So those of you who do this, please stop, you are doing nothing but hurting peoples feelings and coming off like an idiot. PS, I also find it ridiculously funny when the flamers criticizing people's grammar spell incorrectly and use horrible grammar themselves. Nothing like a bit of hypocrisy in the morning.**

**Anyway, this one goes out to my-other-ride-is-you-mum for her fic Memories & Dust, which was my favorite new story to read as I caught up with all of the stories on here. Cheers.**

* * *

Time seemed to be moving in slow motion as I wove my way in and out traffic, desperately trying to make my way to Bristol General. My mind was racing with the many possible situations I could find myself in once I reached the hospital. The nurse that had called had flatly refused to tell me what was going on over the phone, and I felt sick to my stomach at the thought that it might not be good news. I narrowly avoided hitting yet another vehicle, making me realize I needed to fucking calm down if I wanted to make it there in one piece. I took a few deep breaths to calm myself, stepping harder on the accelerator as I did so. I needed to get there as fast as possible, I hated not knowing what was going on.

My phone began buzzing obnoxiously in my pocket, making me fidget to reach for it and almost crash into yet another car. Fucking hell, how had I not been pulled over by this point? I managed to get my phone out of my pocket and was surprised by the name flashing on my screen.

Emily.

"Fuck off," I practically screamed at the phone, clicking ignore and practically throwing it at the passanger seat. I was in no mood for her bullshit. For fucks sakes, I had just gotten an urgent call about my best friend who was in a fucking coma. I didn't need to waste time worrying about that bitch. I shook my head in surprise at the harshness of my own thoughts, but I couldn't help it. The chat I had had with Katie had given me a lot of new information, and perhaps an opportunity for a new perspective, but it didn't change how much Emily had hurt me. Nothing could change that, and she could still quite possibly make it a thousand times worse by turning out to be one of the bad guys.

I guess only time would tell.

I frantically pulled into the parking lot of Bristol General, pushing Emily and all my other thoughts that revolved around anything other than making sure Cook was okay, to the back of mind for now. I sprinted towards the building and burst through the front doors, startling the nurse who was on night watch.

"Sorry," I sputtered out, trying to both catch my breath and keep my emotions under control at the same time. I could feel my stomach twisting with anxiety as I approched her desk. "I was just given a call to come down here… about James Cook?"

The nurse nodded slowly, and the look that graced her features was full of sympathy.

My stomach fell.

She stood and beckoned for me to follow her down the darkened hallway. Time continued to move in slow motion as I followed her, with the only noise in my ear the frantic beating of my own heart. As we neared Cook's room, I saw two doctors standing outside speaking in hushed voices. When they saw me approaching, their expressions softened to match the nurses. Sympathy. I could feel the air being sucked out of my lungs and my vision tunneling as one of the doctors approached me. His lips began to move, but I couldn't hear a word he was saying; I didn't need to. I backed into the wall and began to slide down it as a few of the doctors words began to seep into my brain.

"Serious complications…"

"Brain hemmorrhaging…"

"…unpreventable…"

"…offer our condolences."

I squeezed my eyes shut as his words began to mingle in the air with my own strangled cries, creating a cacophany of undecipherable noise in my brain. I couldn't think. I couldn't breathe. It wasn't possible, he couldn't be gone. He couldn't fucking do this to me. We were Cook and Naomi; he wasn't supposed to leave me alone like this.

I was faintly aware of a gentle voice whispering, "is there anyone you would like to call?"

I looked up from my spot on the floor into the eyes of the now extremely concerned looking nurse. That's when it hit me.

"No, there's no one to call."

My chest was on fire as my head dropped back into my hands. There was no one left to call. Cook had been the only person in my life that I would count on, and now he was gone.

"Okay," the nurse responded gently, "well you can see him if you want," she added, nodding towards the open door before disappearing down the hallway.

I couldn't move, I felt like the whole fucking world had ended. Cook was gone, and there was nothing I could do to change it. Suddenly, I was completely alone in the world, with nothing but my wishes that things could be different. I managed to pull myself to my feet after a few moments, and struggling to even walk I made my way to the door. I hesitated, terrified of what I was going to find inside there, before finally giving in and taking a step forward.

The air was completely sucked out of my lungs as I saw his body covered in a white sheet, and I collapsed to my knees at the side of his bed, dissolving into a heaving mess of tears and sobs.

"I'm so sorry, Cook," I whispered into the silence, before laying my head next to his body and letting myself sob into him. "This should have never fucking happened."

Suddenly, I felt an ice cold hand gripping my shoulder, startling me. I grasped the hand, throwing it away harshly, and jumped to my feet coming face to face with someone that I could truly say I hated.

Effy Stonem.

The reason behind everything. She was the reason that I had lost the only person I could trust; she was the reason I was completely alone.

"Fancy seeing you here," she said, smirking wickedly at me as she brushed her hand along the side of Cook's body.

"Don't fucking touch him," I spat angrily, disgusted that she would have the nerve to be here let alone to fucking touch him.

"Why not?" she asked, before adding "wouldn't be the first time."

Her words through me over the edge, and before I knew what was happening I had snapped. I lunged forward and threw her against the wall, kicking the doors next to us closed. I pressed both of my forearms against her, one on her stomach and one on her neck, to keep her from escaping. I felt myself seething as I looked at her with complete hatred, and I found a look of amusement staring back at me.

"Christ Naomi," she whispered, "Jealous are we? I thought you were gay as a window."

"He was my fucking best friend," I whispered at her harshly, "and you _fucking _killed him. This has nothing to do with fucking jealousy."

"Oh Naomi, don't you see. Cookie didn't fall in line, and now Cookie is toast," she answered, reaching a hand up to touch my cheek, "you would do well to learn a lesson from that."

"I'm going to fucking kill you, you evil bitch," I spat, anger practically flooding out of me and I continued to restrain her. She laughed heartily in response to my threat, continuing to surprise me with her seemingly endless arrogance.

"Emily was right, you are extremely fucking sexy when you're angry," she said, shooting me a seductive look.

"Shut the fuck up," I screamed back at her, tightening my grip on her throat. She just continued laughing at me.

"What you're going to kill me here? Where I can scream once and have about twenty doctors and nurses running to my aid?" she continued staring into my eyes, daring me to make a move. My anger was boiling over, to the point where I couldn't taste anything else. But she was right, and I reluctantly loosened my grip on her, allowing her to slip past me toward the door.

"Be seeing you, babe," she whispered before leaving me alone once again. I slammed the door shut behind her, my whole body shaking with the amount of pain and anger that was coursing through it at the same time. I turned back to the bed and was startled by what I saw there.

A single red rose.

My hand was shaking as I reached forward to pick it up. The thorns pricked me slightly as I turned it over and saw a clearly labeled tag reading "_Naomi."_

"No fucking way," I whispered to myself. My brain suddenly jumped back to the memory of when I had found a red rose left for Cook. Fucking hell, this was not fucking good. Cook was dead, they had fucking killed him, and now I had been given the kiss of death.

"Fuck," I whispered aloud, perfectly aware that there was no one around to hear me. There was only one answer to this problem now: I had to get to them before they got to me.

I dashed out of the room and down the hallway. I had to get to Freddie's to tell him we needed to speed the plan up. Fucking hell, I didn't know how much longer I had, nothing was fucking safe now. I made it through the hospital doors and stopped for a moment to catch my breath. I looked up, surprised to see Effy approximately ten feet away from me jumping into the passenger seat of a black sedan. She looked back toward me and smiled wickedly, directly my attention to her right. My eyes trailed over slowly and I caught the eye of the driver.

Emily.

Before I could react, things got so much fucking worse.

I watched helplessly as Effy reached across and pulled Emily in for a heated kiss.


	20. So Hard Done By

**Hey all! Sorry for the slight delay once again, life has just gotten so busy on me lately. But I really got my head back into this story the last few days so hopefully updates will be more frequent, provided my boss doesn't decide to sweep me off my feet with work again. Also, I realize I am the worst person ever at replying to questions, comments, and messages, but really I am so, so busy lately. I promise I will try and respond to the ones from the last chapter as soon as possible, as well as if there are any on this one.**

**Anyway, this chapter is kind of short, but I'm sure you'll all understand why once you read it (if you haven't noticed, the chapters have been getting progressively shorter since chapter 13, tehe). The next one will be LONG though, according to the outline I've done for it and what I'm imagining it to be in my head. Hope you enjoy it :).**

* * *

Before I even realized that my feet were moving, I had somehow made it back to my car. I felt tears stinging my eyes as the haunting image of Emily with that evil bitch burned itself into my memory. My insides were flaming like molten lava and I felt like I was about to vomit all over the place as I pushed my car into gear and roared out of the parking lot. My mind couldn't comprehend any sound as I weaved in and out of traffic, but I knew I was screaming. Tears were flowing so freely from my eyes that I could barely see, but I was far from concerned that I was currently a danger to myself and everyone else on the road.

It was official, I had nothing left to lose. My best friend was dead, and the only girl I've ever loved had betrayed me more than I could possibly have imagined. My life was in complete and utter fucking shambles. And now, the only thing I had left to hold on to was the possibility of getting revenge on the people that caused me all of this pain. It was the only thing I had to live for.

My chest was on fire, and suddenly felt like I was going to be sick. I lurched the car to the left and screeched it to a halt on the side of the road. I pushed open the car door and crumbled to the ground as my insides began gushing out all over the rocks. The rain was spilling around me and I could hear cracks of thunder filling the dead night air. I pushed my increasingly soaked hair out of my face as I finished puking and began pounding the ground with my fists as hard I could. My brain wasn't functioning properly, and I could barely feel anything but the overwhelming pain in my chest. My breaths were coming in ragged gasps and my vision was nothing but a dark blur. I finally stopped pounding the ground after I noticed I was bleeding all over it and I pushed myself up so I was looking up at the sky. The rain cascaded down my face, co-comingling with the river of tears that already existed there.

I just wanted to stay there and die.

But I knew I couldn't. I needed to make Effy Stonem pay for what she had done to me. I needed to make her and her fucking brother pay for what they did to Cook. And I needed to make Emily pay for destroying what was left of my already fragile heart. I shuddered as I thought of her and continued to let the rain pour over me, perhaps hoping that it would somehow wash away my conflicting feelings for the redheaded she-devil that had successfully destroyed me.

I finally pulled myself up off my knees and struggled to climb back into my car. I shut the door behind me and looked at myself in the rearview mirror. My eyes were sunken and red from crying more tears that I ever thought possible and my hair was a soaking, sticky mess. My hands were a bloody fucking travesty from pounding the ground and my jeans were torn from crawling on the rocks. I looked pathetic, I knew it. But that didn't matter anymore.

I push the car into gear and race off towards Freddie's house.

No more fucking waiting.

I pulled up outside of Freddie's flat just over ten minutes later after driving like a speed demon to get there as fast as I did. I pushed the car into park and sat there, momentarily debating whether or not I should leave it running. After all I wouldn't be staying long. I eventually decided to shut it off and take the keys with me. I couldn't risk losing my only means of transportation, even if I only needed it for another couple of hours.

I hopped out into the rain once again, briefly staring skyward to let the rain fall freely over my face. Before I realized what I was doing, I reached up to wipe my eyes with my hand and left a bloody streak across my forehead, giving me an even more battered appearance than I already had. I sighed in frustration, but didn't bother to try and wipe it off. Truth be told, I could have cared less how I looked at this point.

Rather than ringing Freddie's buzzer, I pushed every one but his until someone finally rang me through. I didn't want him to be anticipating my arrival. Like the beaten down shell of a human being I had become, I trudged through the hallway, climbing flight after flight of stairs until I finally reached the seventh floor. I dragged myself down the hallway, feeling increasingly unable to hold myself up with the overwhelming amount of grief and sorrow that was weighing me down. Grasping at the side panels on the wall, I left a bloody trail all along the white wall paper with my badly damaged hands. I was thankful it was so late in the evening, otherwise I would have had to face the possibility of some random person coming out of their flat to find me a sobbing, soaking, and bleeding mess in their hallway. I momentarily thought that I would promise Freddie that I would come back and clean it up tomorrow. But then again, for me, there would be no tomorrow.

I finally reached room 734, and began beating on it much louder than I had intended to, despite the excruciating pain it was shooting through my body. It didn't take long for Freddie to come to the door, and once it opened, his look immediately changed from mild annoyance to completely horrified.

"Holy fuck Naomi," he exclaimed, taking a step toward me, "what the bloody hell happened to you?"

I shrugged his hands off as he tried to touch me and stumbled past him into the flat. I immediately noticed Pandora and JJ who jumped from their seats in concern when they saw the state of me. Their voices ran around in my mind creating nothing but a web of sounds and meaningless words until I finally put my hands up and screamed at them to stop. They all stood frozen as my voice broke through their stream of questions and concerns, effectively creating the silence I craved so much.

"Just fucking stop," I repeated, bringing my bleeding hands to my face once again.

I could almost hear my voice echoing throughout the room as I prepared to let the next words fall from my mouth.

"Cook is dead."

The silence continued, so I decided to continue as well.

"So, I'm going to kill her, then Tony, and it will all be over."

The silence ended.

"Naomi are you fucking crazy," Freddie shouted before anyone else could get a word in, "I'm sorry about everything that's happened, and I promise you, they will get their fucking due. But you can't just run off and take them on your own. You need to time to process what.."

"Shut the fuck up," I screamed, interrupting him, "I have only ever loved two things in this world, and now both of them are fucking gone. Do you fucking hear me Freddie? I. Have. Nothing."

"If you try and get them alone you'll get yourself killed," I heard JJ interject from the corner of the room.

"Well," I sighed, "maybe that's for the best."

"Naomi stop," Freddie started, jumping forward and grabbing my shoulders before I could pull away from him, "you're not thinking clearly."

"Maybe not," I replied, feeling my body shaking against his grip on my shoulders, "but that doesn't fucking matter does it. Who the fuck cares if I run in there and get myself killed, huh?"

"We'd care," Panda almost whispered from the corner.

"And Emily would care," Freddie said almost as quietly, but before the words had even finished leaving his mouth I had struck him as hard as I could manage in my state.

"Don't you fucking lie to me to try and make me calm the fuck down," I screamed in his face, seething with an overwhelming rage, "if Emily cared about me she wouldn't have snogged that fucking crazy bitch in front of me would she?"

Freddie simply looked dumbfounded as I continued.

"Unless completely destroying my heart and my life has somehow became a sign of affection, I don't think she would fucking care."

With those final words, I made my way for the door. I tried to push past Freddie, but he placed his hand on my chest and firmly pushed me back.

"Naomi," he started, his voice even, "we're not letting you leave in this state."

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Pandora and JJ moving towards me, so I quickly reached around to the holster I had secured on the small of my back and pulled out the gun Freddie had given to me. His eyes widened and instantly he took a step back from me.

"Try and fucking stop me," I told him, certain that I was capable of great violence in the state I was currently in.

He stepped aside slowly, nodding his head and clearing a path to the door for me. I lowered my gun and started to move past him, finally managing to swing open the door. I had barely made it two steps out when I felt someone connect with my back and I was sent flying into the wall. My gun flew out of my hand and down the hallway and I screamed in agony as my head hit the floor at full force. My vision started to blur and I could hear distorted voices yelling and screaming at each other in panic. I allowed my eyes to fall shut, but not before catching a few flashes of red zipping down the hallway. I took a shaky breath, hoping with every inch of my soul that I would be given mercy and it would be my last.

And then everything went black.

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**Please don't judge Naomi for her actions in this, I think you'll all understand why I did it like this.**

**Anyway, there's chapter 20! I promise there will be Emily in the next chapter, and more than just a brief glimpse. Poor dear has been absent for far too long. **

**Questions, comments, concerns, and suggestions are welcome. _I swear I will reply!_**


	21. Total Eclipse Of The Heart

**Hey hey kids!**

**'Tis me again, back much faster this time. Hopefully I will continue updating with regularity until this story finishes, which is not that far away now *wink wink*. I honestly thought about ending it last chapter and just having Naomi die... nah I'm kidding! I could never do that to you guys... or the characters for that matter!**

**I bet you're all laughing at the title of this chapter. But hey, I like 80s one hit wonders, they keep us honest. Plus this song really fit with the mood of this chapter. Also, for anyone who is interested, I used the Glee version of this song to write this because I like the way it ends better (because it ends with the line "turn around bright eyes" and I imagine Emily thinking that at the very end in response to Naomi's thought... and I imagine her singing all the "turn around" parts haha). So I guess you know it isn't going to be all sunshine and rainbows, but when is this story ever? This chapter is longer than the last couple as promised. It was originally even longer, but I split it into two parts because it didn't flow as well as one giant chapter. But the good news is that you can expect the other half very soon. I'm also very excited because I used some original Naomily dialogue in this chapter (yes, there is actually Naomily interaction in this one!) which is something I don't normally do. I think I used it well, all you experts on doing so will have to let me know what you think. :)**

**Once again I'd like to thank all of my reviewers and readers. You guys are really the reason this story has become what it has, because as you will recall, I originally intended on it being nothing but a smutty one shot. I can't exactly promise more smut in the future, but I can promise that you won't regret sticking with this story! Also, I've been meaning to say this for so long and I just remembered so I'll say it now: I love how much everyone loves my evil-sociopath-Effy. Effy is one of my favorite characters and that was what made it so fun to make her like this. If I did it with any other character, I just don't think it would work as well.**

**Again, another giant author's note from me. I think I like talking too much...**

**Anyway... it's 2am and I'm going to sleep... enjoy!**

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The first thing I was aware of when I opened my eyes was the searing pain shooting through my skull. I squeezed them tightly shut once again hoping to make the pain disappear, but it seemed to do nothing to help me. I groaned involuntarily and tried to lift my arms to rub my eyes, but I quickly realized my left arm was handcuffed to the bed.

"Fucking Stonems," I whispered aloud, panic setting in very quickly. They must have gotten me as a I was making my way out of Freddie's apartment.

I started roughly, and futiley, tugging on the handcuffs to try and free myself but due to my recent injury I was quickly tired out. I collapsed back onto the bed in frustration and anger. Fucking hell, things just couldn't possibly get any worse, could they? Not only was my whole life in shambles, but now I was a fucking prisoner chained to a bed.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I repeated angerly, but quietly as I wasn't sure I wanted my captors to be aware that I was awake just yet. I pushed myself up once again and examined the spot where I was chained to see if by some miracle I could just slip the handcuffs right off. I was disappointed to find I was chained to the bedframe, so escape that way was not an option. I punched at the bedframe in frustration but quickly withdrew my hand as a sharp pain shot through it. I looked down to see that both of my hands were bandaged up. Fuck, I had practically destroyed them on the ground last night hadn't I?

But why would people who kidnapped me bother to bandage up my hands?

"Oh good, you're awake," an unfamiliar female voice rang through the room causing me to jump about a mile in the air. My eyes fell upon a young woman with dark hair who was slowly making her way towards me juggling a glass of water, more bandages, and a bunch of pill bottles. My brow furrowed in confusion. Did the Stonem's have their own personal physician? And why the fuck did they care whether or not I was in pain, they had certainly caused me enough emotional pain by now. The woman set her items down on the nightstand next to my bed and reached for my hand.

"Let's take a look at these now shall we…" she said with a smile, but I yanked my hand away from her before she could touch it.

"Who the fuck are you?" I asked, sounding more fearful than angry.

A look of confusion crossed the woman's face, but her features quickly shot up into a look of surprise and worry.

"Oh shit, I'm so sorry. I guess this doesn't look good with you chained up to the bed and me just prancing in here without introducing myself," she replied with a sheepish smile on her face. "Freddie she's awake!" she suddenly shouted, causing me to recoil from her once again.

She looked back at me with a gentle smile on her face, "I'm Karen McClair, well, Dr. Karen McClair, Freddie's sister," she told me, sticking out her hand for me to shake it. I just sort of looked at her hand for a moment before she suddenly pulled it back and covered her own mouth with it.

"Oh shit, I'm so sorry! I totally forgot that they're are so damaged and that it would probably, like, hurt a lot to shake someone's hand right now!"

Seriously, this woman was a doctor?

Before I could say anything sarcastic or insulting, Freddie poked his head in through the door and smiled at me. I shot him a weak, and annoyed smile back.

"Hello Naomi, good to see that you've rejoined us. Hope my sister didn't scare you."

"Oh no it's fine," I started sarcastically, glancing over at Karen who was now re-bandaging my hand, "knocking me out, chaining me to a bed, and then having the first person I see when I wake up be a stranger didn't make me think I was kidnapped at all."

"Yeah sorry about all that," he replied, rubbing the back of his neck, "I didn't mean to knock you out, I was just trying to stop you from getting away without getting myself shot."

A memory of myself brandishing a weapon suddenly flickered across my mind.

"Oh shit, sorry about that," I apologized, sort of in shock at my own behaviour.

"It's alright," he replied quickly, "you were really fucking upset, and rightfully so, we just didn't want you to go and get yourself killed last night."

A pain much sharper than the ones in my head or hands suddenly shot through my heart as I remembered the reason I was so upset. I quickly rebounded, and trying to push it out of my mind for the time being, I nodded.

"Yeah thanks, I was a real mess… is that why I'm chained to the bed?"

"No, that was all me," Karen suddenly spoke up, winking seductively at me. My mouth opened in shock, but before I could say anything they both burst out laughing.

"Kidding, kidding," she said, holding up her hands defensively.

"Yeah, we cuffed you to the bed to make sure you wouldn't wake up and run off when you woke up," Freddie answered once he had stopped laughing.

"And they knew you wouldn't be safe at a hospital, so Freds called me in to bandage up your pretty little self," Karen told me with a wink she continued to tend to my wounds.

I nodded absently, my mind drifting off to another place as Freddie and Karen carried on the conversation without me, joking and bickering in a way only siblings could. Cook and I used to be like that. I felt a single tear rolling down my cheek as I realized he was the only family I ever really had. My parents had died in a car accident when I was really young, and growing up in foster homes didn't exactly give me the chance to get close to anyone. Cook really saved me, I don't know where I would be without him. He was like a brother to me. Sure we would bicker and take the piss out of each other all the time, just like Freddie and Karen were doing now. But ultimately, he was my best friend, my brother, my family… and now he was gone. And the only other person I had let get even somewhat close to me had broken my heart into a billion tiny pieces and lit them on fire. I sighed, wishing for days when things were less complicated, when Cook was alive and Emily and I were still happily together. When I could always taste her on my tongue, or feel her on my skin. When her laugh was all I heard and her smile was all I saw. But now, all of those memories were tainted with the images of her kissing Effy, and the way she had looked at me when I told her I never wanted to see her again.

I was snapped out my reverie by the sound of a door closing loudly in the other room. I glanced over at Freddie and began to feel a twinge of fear when I saw that he and Karen were currently sharing a look of concern.

"Are we expecting anyone?" I asked, almost afraid to hear the answer.

"No," Freddie answered simply, reaching into his back pocket and pulling out a small pistol.

We could hear footsteps getting closer and closer as we waited in silent anticipation. The door to the bedroom creaked open to reveal the face of the last person I wanted to see right now.

Effy Stonem.

"Well, well," she said with her trademark smirk appearing on her lips, "what do we have here?" She walked towards the bed looking at me with completely fake concern plastered on her face. "Did you slip and fall babe?"

"How did you find us, Effy?" Freddie asked, seemingly in shock that Effy could possibly know where we were. Effy just smirked wickedly in his direction.

"My driver is quite fantastic at following distressed blondes," she told us, as she glanced back towards the door. As if waiting for her cue, the person I somehow simultaneously loved and hated stepped through the door holding a pistol in her perfect white hands.

Fucking Emily.

Time seemed to stand still as my heart involuntarily leapt up in my throat. Apparently my body wasn't quite as aware as my brain that this woman was pure evil. She cast me a sexy smirk that was almost mocking, which earned a look of approval from Effy.

"Emily, this is Freddie and Karen… and I think you and Naomi have met before haven't you babe?" Effy continued, shooting me a amused glance and she slid towards Emily, wrapping her arms around her waist.

"Once or twice," Emily answered as Effy ran her hands down her body. I cringed despite myself, which didn't go unnoticed by anyone in the room.

"What the fuck do you want Effy?" Freddie asked, breaking the thick silence that was hanging in the air.

"Freddie McClair," she started, slinking away from Emily and towards Freddie, seemingly unaffected by the fact that she was moving between two people pointing guns at each other. "Long time no see babe, you didn't really think we actually believed you we dead did you?" she added quickly, throwing in a mocking laugh for good measure. "That's alright though, we don't care about you. You're meaningless. What we want is her," she finished, gesturing towards me.

"Fuck off," I answered quickly, leaping forward off the bed only to realize I was still handcuffed to it, earning a laugh from Effy.

"Oh someone's been naughty," she mocked, "do you really think you can hurt me anyway with a bashed in skull, and damaged hands. Not to mention all the emotional damage Emsy and I have done to you," she added, smiling back in Emily's direction. "That's her favorite kind of damage, isn't that right babe," she purred, making her way back towards Emily who was still in a stand still with Freddie. She slinked up her body and dropped open mouth kisses all down her neck. I watched as Emily shuddered and I let out a shudder of my own. But mine was one of disgust. Effy immediately noticed my distress and turned back to face me.

"You know what you are Naomi?" she asked me, taking a step closer, "you're pathetic," she spat in my face.

My eyes shot to floor as she continued.

"You pushed everyone away until you only had one person left, and now he's gone. You were stupid enough to let a girl who was only using you take your heart and destroy it," she added, smiling fondly at Emily as if what she had done to me was some grand triumph, "and now you're nothing but a shell of a human being; broken by death, loss, and unrequited love. You're worthless Naomi, you should just let us kill you now and save the world the agony of another second with you…"

Effy's sentence was cut off as a resounding crack cut through the room and something connected with the back of her head. The look on her face went from menacing to one of pain and shock. I looked up to see that Emily was no longer pointing her weapon at Freddie, but had seemingly just smacked Effy with it and was now pointing it right at her. Effy fell to her knees and looked up at Emily in shock. It was the first time I had ever seen Effy look so vulnerable.

"Why?" she squeaked out before Emily smacked her once again, this time knocking her out cold.

As her body hit the floor with a dull thud I looked at Emily in complete shock and confusion at what had just happened. I looked over at Freddie for some kind of reassurance but he was simply staring blankly at Effy laying at his feet.

"What the fuck are you waiting for?" Emily voice pierced through the silence, "help me get her fucking tied up!"

Freddie and Karen leapt forward, Karen running out of the room ahead of them as Emily and Freddie carried Effy out, leaving me flabergasted on the bed.

"Hello, still fucking chained up here!" I shouted after them, yanking on my chained arm in annoyance. Karen reappeared after a moment and offered me an apology and a sheepish smile while uncuffing me. I leapt out of the bed and dashed into the living room to find Emily and Freddie tying Effy's limp form to a chair.

"Think this will hold her?" Emily asked, still not aware of my presence in the room.

"Yeah, it'll do," Freddie responded as he wrapped a final knot around her dangling wrist, "Katie was right Emily, this worked perfectly."

"Well you know my sister," Emily replied with a smile, "always with the brilliant ideas."

"Just like mine," he added, laughing lightly as the two of them continued to make sure Effy was properly bound.

"Okay," I said finally, alerting them of my presence in the room.

Both of their heads snapped up and Emily's eyes locked on mine. Her eyes conveyed so many emotions in those short seconds I felt that I would be overcome with the weight of them all. She looked so broken and vulnerable, and terrified of what I was going to say next. Yet she looked at me like I was the only thing in the world I wanted to lay her eyes on right now. I also saw a sense of relief in her, perhaps because she was able to look at me however she wanted right now without anyone watching her. But none of that changed anything that had happened, or the fact that I still had no idea what the fuck was going on.

"What the fuck is this?" I stuttered, seemingly unable to get anymore words out of my mouth.

Freddie took a step towards me with his hands up as if he were defending himself. I had a feeling I wasn't going to like what I was about to hear.

"Look Naomi, don't get mad okay? But we were hoping that Effy would find out where we were hiding out so we could trap her here," Freddie told me, glancing back at Emily for confirmation.

"We knew Effy would be to resist taking me here to humiliate you…" Emily added as she stared at the floor, refusing to meet my eyes.

"So you used me as bait?" I asked incredulously, my emotions starting to boil over.

"No Naomi, it wasn't like that," he exclaimed, trying to defend himself, "we didn't use you as bait, we just knew Effy would eventually follow you here. We didn't know how or when, but when made a plan for when it did happen."

"So why the fuck didn't you tell me?" I screamed back at him, "you put my fucking life in danger you bastard, and you made me think Emily was fucking evil. Why the fuck did you warn me off her if you knew she was with you all along?"

"I didn't know!" he insisted, "she only came with Katie to speak with me two days ago, before that I could only assume she was with the Stonems."

"So… why the fuck didn't you fucking tell me!" I seethed at him, lacing every word with the uncontrollable anger that was currently raging through my body.

"We couldn't Naomi, Effy is known for being very perceptive and we couldn't risk you giving us away."

"In other words, you fucking used me as bait to catch her, just like I fucking said before. And, apparently everyone I know is hellbent on fucking lying to me"

"No, Naomi please calm down..," I heard Emily start to say from the corner.

"Shut up," I interrupted her, holding my hand up to silence her, "I don't want to hear it, or anything from you. Like I can even trust a word out of your fucking mouth. This changes nothing, you may not be on their fucking side, but you still fucking ripped me to shreads and proved to me exactly why I never let anyone get close to me. So you can fuck right off, I don't even want to be in the same fucking room with you."

I turned away from her, not wanting to see a reaction, and faced Freddie.

"Well… Naomi… I'm sorry but it's not safe for any of us to leave right now. Katie, JJ, Panda and Thomas will be here soon and we're all in lockdown until we enact the plan…" he told me quietly, seeming to be afraid of my reaction. I groaned loudly in frustration.

"Fine, but I stand by what I said before," I started, addressing Emily but still not looking at her, "when this is over, I don't ever want to fucking see you again."

With that I spun around and left the room, brushing by Karen who was still standing awkwardly in the doorway. I rushed to the bedroom where I was sleeping only mere moments ago before everything erupted in chaos once again. I was about to slam the door when a booted foot stuck its way through and stopped the door from closing. I swung the door back open to find Emily standing on the other side. Her eyes were gleaming with unshed tears, and she looked absolutely shattered. No matter how angry I was I couldn't help but feel a twinge of pain at seeing her like this.

"Naomi, please talk to me, I'm so sorry."

"You've done nothing but lie to me since the moment I met you," I answered, the anger had faded from my voice and now it was replaced with nothing but sadness, "you made me trust you, you made me feel safe, you made me fall…" my voice gave out on me before I could say anything else.

"Naomi, please," she begged me, now sobbing openly, "everything I did, I did it to protect you. Please just let me explain."

I laughed and shook my head in response.

"Yeah, a great job protecting me you did. I may be alive Emily, but I wish I wasn't. My best friend is dead, and you completely destroyed me… I don't think I can ever forgive you for what you've done to me. I can't trust you…"

I started to close the door but Emily stopped me again.

"Naomi, I wanted to tell you.."

"But you didn't, did you _hun?_"

I finally managed to close the door and collapsed against it into a shaking mess. I could feel her do the same on the other side and felt tears begin to trickle down my cheek. Physically there were only a a few layers of wood separating us… but in reality there was so much more to stop us from ever being together again.

I placed my hand against the door, reveling in being even this close to her once again. I could hate her all I wanted, but fucking hell I couldn't change how much I loved her.

_Once upon a time I was falling in love… now I'm only falling apart._


	22. Summersong

**Hello Electric Feelies, yeah cute name huh? Anyway this story is about two (maybe three at the most) chapters away from being finished. I know, makes me sad too. This one is, unfortunately a little more delayed than I hoped. It was one of those chapter that I had envisioned from the beginning, so I wanted to get it just right. I wrote it over and over and over again but I couldn't seem to make myself satisfied with it (I always knew what I wanted to happen, I just couldn't get it out right). So I'm still not 100% satisfied with it, but hopefully you lot will disagree. This is by far the longest chapter yet, and hopefully it will answer alot of questions. Anyway, that's about all I have to say on this one. Enjoy!**

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**I awoke hours later, still curled in a tiny ball against the door that separated me from the chaos that lay on the other side. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and saw that it was dark once again, meaning I had most likely slept most of the afternoon. After picking myself up off the floor, I trudged lazily over to the bed on the other side of the room and flopped down on top of it. Memories from the last few hours came flooding back to me and I felt tears spring to my eyes as I thought about all that had happened recently. All of this stuff with Emily… I just couldn't wrap my head around it; I was completely overwhelmed. That alone was too much for one person to handle and I just didn't know what to do anymore, especially after piling everything that had happened with Cook and the Stonem's on top of it as well. No matter what way I spun it, though, it seemed that my life had dove into a downward spiral from the moment I met Emily.

I mean sure, she turned out to not be evil, for lack of a better word. But she still lied to me and put my life in danger. She let me walk away from her when she didn't know if I would be safe, and she let me believe that she was fucking Effy and intending on screwing me over the entire time. I rubbed at my temples as I tried to process how all of this could possibly make sense, but no matter what I just couldn't figure it out. As much as I hated to admit it, I needed to talk to Emily. I would never have any peace of mind without an explanation. Even though getting one would probably hurt like fucking hell.

Things were so much easier when I thought she was evil.

I crept out through Freddie's apartment, surprised to find the place completely dark. I guessed I had overestimated how long I had slept as I walked through the hallway, smacking into a few things and stubbing my toe along the way. I finally made it into the living room and quickly noticed Effy hanging limply from the ropes she was bound to the chair with. Fucking hell, I guess Emily had hit that bitch pretty hard. I continued through Freddie's flat hoping to find some sign of where she could be. The flat was pretty large afterall, and there seemed to be an endless number of doors in the hallway. I figured having a doctor for a sister must be paying off for Freddie. After a few moments, I heard her voice through one of the doors at the end of the hall. My heart began to race involuntarily and a shook my head at the fact that she could still make me feel that way after everything that has happened between us.

As I got closer I could hear the conversation a little clearer.

"I just don't know what to do anymore," I heard her distressed voice telling someone.

"I know Em, you fucked it all up pretty bad," I heard another voice say, which I was pretty sure was Katie.

"Like I had any other choice Katie," yep, definitely Katie in there, "I mean, what was I supposed to do?"

"I know Em, this is all well fucked up, but it's not over. You can still fix this and live happily ever after, just like you always wanted."

"She hates me Katie."

"I'm sure she doesn't hate you, you just need to give her time."

"I'm just so…" I heard Emily's voice dissolve into broken sobs and Katie beginning to whisper comforting words to her.

I stood frozen for a moment, listening to Emily sobbing quietly with her sister on the other side of the door. Before I knew it, I found myself turning around and heading back through the apartment. I wasn't ready to face her, not yet. There were still too many emotions hanging in the air and although I wanted an explanation, I couldn't handle her being so upset right now. It would only make me more upset and add to my already immense confusion. I was moving through the living room when suddenly I heard a voice break through the silence.

"You haven't won anything you know," I heard Effy say, and I stood there with my back turned, deciding whether or not I would dignify her with an answer.

"She doesn't belong with you, she belongs with me…"

"What makes you think that?" I spat at her, turning around to face her despite myself.

"What makes you think you can trust her? Because she hit me in the back of the head with a gun and tied me up? Right, because Emily's never manipulated you before, has she?"

I just shook my head at her, not wanting to give her the satisfaction of getting another response from me and turned on my heels to head back to my room. I could hear her laughing almost manically behind me and I felt myself shuddering at the sound of it. She was right though. The last few hours didn't necessarily mean that Emily was in fact on our side. She could just be manipulating us once again, for whatever reason. I wanted to believe she wouldn't lie like that again, but I knew I had no reason to believe she wouldn't. I sighed as I realized that I was once again at a crossroads of wanting her but being completely unable to trust her. I was so confused about how I felt I wasn't sure I could even think straight anymore.

I made it back to my room and curled up on the bed. Luckily, after a few moments I somehow managed to push all of the negative thoughts out my brain long enough to fall into a fitful, dreamless sleep.

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I awoke several hours later to a knock on my door. It was so soft, I was scarely sure I heard it at all. For a second, I thought I had just dreamt it, but when I heard a second knock I decided that it wasn't a figment of my imagination and got up to answer it. I made my way over to the door before quickly realizing I should probably grab something to protect myself just in case whoever was on the other side of the door was not so friendly. After all, things had been so fucked up recently I couldn't take any chances. I noticed an old metal baseball bat in the corner of the room and quickly grabbed it before tiptoeing back over to answer the door. I swung the door open, bat in hand, to reveal a startled Emily staring back at me. I felt my features soften as I drunk her in. Her eyes were red and sunken, and she looked like she hadn't been to sleep yet. Her hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail and she was wearing an old black tshirt and tiny jean shorts. Most people would probably have thought that she looked a right mess, but I somehow couldn't shake the out of control fluttering of my heart as I looked at her. I noticed her eyes widen in shock as she noticed the bat and I quickly dropped it to my side.

"Hi," she whispered, her voice so husky that it caused an involuntary shiver to run down through my body, "can I come in?"

I nodded, not trusting my voice just yet. I wasn't sure if this was really the best time to have this conversation, but I didn't know how much longer my brain could handle the confusion of not having an explanation. She followed me into the room and I saw her standing awkwardly and fidgeting with the hem of her top from the corner of my eye. I set the bat down to it's original resting place and turned back to face her.

"What's with the bat?" she asked, chuckling slightly as if trying to make light of the situation.

"Well, there's a pretty dangerous woman in this flat with me right now," I answered quickly.

"I think she's a little tied up right now," Emily responded with some disdain in her voice.

"Maybe I didn't mean her."

At that Emily's face crumbled and I could tell I'd hit her hard. She faced away from me, seeming to be trying extremely hard to maintain her composure.

"That's fair," she finally said, "I guess I've never given you any reason to trust me."

"Right, you haven't" I agreed, trying to keep my voice as even in possible, "so what do you want, then?"

"I want to explain everything to you Naomi," she answered, sitting down on the edge of the bed, "I need you to understand."

I was silent for a few moments before sitting on the bed as far away from her as I could possibly be.

"I don't know that I can understand, but I need an explanation for my own sanity."

She smiled sadly, seemingly grateful for the fact that I was going to hear her out. I watched as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath as if trying to steady herself. She over at me and began.

"My full name is Emily Anne Fitch, I moved here from London with Katie when I was eighteen after…"

"Wait, wait," I interrupted her right away, "what has this got to do with anything?"

"It's the beginning of everything I want to tell you," she answered immediately, looking away before continuing, "well the beginning of how I rehearsed it… but it is important."

I nodded, trying to show no emotion but unable to prevent myself from thinking it was cute that she had rehearsed her explanation for me. Damn me and my uncontrollable emotions. I felt another flutter in my stomach as I realized I knew her last name now. Fitch. Emily Fitch. It just seemed so perfect for her.

"Anyway, as I was saying," she continued, "Katie and I moved here from London when we were eighteen after our parents kicked us out. Well, after they kicked me out and Katie came with me that is."

She paused for a second and looked at me for some kind of reaction to her revelation, but when I didn't give her one she went right on with the sotry.

"Basically what happened was that my parents found out I was gay and the fucking bastards kicked me out. Right homophobic cocks there were. And Katie, being the good sister that she is, basically told them they were both cunts and left with me."

"Emily," I interrupted once again, "I still don't see what this has.."

"Just trust me okay," she told me, before grimacing at those words and chosing different ones, "I mean I'm getting there. So, when Katie and I got to Bristol, we weren't sure what to do with ourselves. We had very little money and no family or friends to help us... and that was when we met Effy. She gave us a place to stay and offered us work at her brother's club. Of course, at the time we didn't exactly know what that work would be. Anyway, when Katie found out, she refused to let them make me into a stripper and told them they could only have us if they let me work the bar. A real mama bear that one, always protecting me."

She paused for a second, and smiled a little at that thought, which made the corners of my mouth tug up slightly in appreciation of their bond.

"In fact, Katie has spent pretty much her entire life trying to protect me. She walked away from our family when they kicked me out, she demeaned herself to put a roof over our heads and made sure I didn't get dragged down into it too. She was always there for me, and I had never had anyone else," she stopped momentarily, drawing in a shaky breath, "When she fell ill last year, I promised her that I would keep her safe just like she always did for me. So when Tony told her she couldn't strip anymore because of her surgery scars, I stepped in so we wouldn't lose our jobs."

"I don't understand Emily, are you really going to expect me to believe that everything you did you did to protect Katie? Because that would far from explain everything."

"I'm not done Naomi. Anyway, I suppose Freddie told you all about Tony's… er… means of recruiting people."

I nodded as felt my stomach drop in fear of what I was about to hear.

"Well, I had always refused to be a part of that, and Tony put up with it for a long time because I was so good at what I did. But after a while he started pressuring me to bring in some female recuits, so I told him I wouldn't stand for it and that I was going to quit. After all, Katie and I had enough bar experience built up by then to get respectable jobs in regular pubs. So Tony… he… he…"

Her voice broke off and I could see tears rolling down her cheeks, and I felt myself scooting a little closer to her.

"He told me that Katie and I knew too much for him to let us go alive, and that I shouldn't doubt his power to snap his fingers and have both of us killed. I wanted to get out so bad Naomi, I really did, but I couldn't risk our lives like that…I couldn't risk Katie's life like that."

I nodded encouragily, now close enough to her that I could lay a comforting hand on her thigh urging her to continue. I felt her shudder as my hand made contact with her skin and I quickly withdrew it, earning me a sad smile from the her.

"Then he said he was sick of playing by my rules, and now it was time I gave something back to him. This conversation… well it happened the night before I met you."

"So I was right," I answered tightly, trying to keep my voice even but failing miserably, "I was just a part of your fucking job." I could feel my whole world crumbling all over again as those words left my mouth, and unshed tears began flowing to my already red eyes. I chanced a look over at Emily who was shaking her head at me.

"No, no, it wasn't like that Naomi," she responded quickly, reaching over to take my hand in hers. Goosebumps erupted on my skin almost immediately and I swore at my body for being so uncooperative. "Yes, Tony ordered me to get someone that night… but it wasn't supposed to be you. When I saw you, it was like I was seeing for the first time. I couldn't keep my eyes off of you, every little thing you did was so amazing and beautiful that I just thought… well I thought that in different circumstances that we could have been great together. And god, Naomi, I still feel that. But there was just something about you I knew I couldn't taint. So I zeroed in on another girl who was drinking with a few male coworkers by the bar. But before I could get to her, you bloody walked right into me and you were so fucking adorable I couldn't stop myself from flirting with you. And Tony saw everything…" she trailed off.

"So he made you pick me?"

"I'm so sorry, but I had to do it, I couldn't risk him killing us, you have no idea what he's like Naomi. He's a very powerful man."

I nodded at her, choosing not to say anything and instead rub my thumb over the outside of her hand that I was still holding in mine. She smiled slightly and looked down at our joined hands. She took her free hand and ran it over my bandages before looking up at me.

"What happened to these?" she asked, "they kind of make you look like some sort of crazy boxer."

"I was a little upset," I started, "after I saw you with Effy."

Her features dropped into a sullen, sorrowful look and she turned away from me again. "I guess I should explain the rest of this to you, yeah? So after Tony forced me into… using you," she said, gulping over those words, "I tried to push myself away from developing any more feelings for you. But you were so good to me… you treated me better than I thought I ever deserved to be treated. You looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing in the whole world… and what was better you even made me feel like I was. So I decided to try and talk some sense into Tony again… which culminated in him telling me that if I didn't stick with the plan he'd kill me, Katie, and… you."

"Me?"

"Yes, Naomi. Don't you see, I had to lie to you to protect you, to protect Katie. There was nothing else I could do."

"Wait though… how come he didn't kill you when I told you I never wanted to see you again?"

"I really expected him to," she sighed, "but instead he just told me that, that meant he would have to get Effy to kill you. So I pretended I felt nothing for you and pledged to help Effy so I could protect you for as long as I could. And when Katie told me that she was helping some guy named Freddie bring down Tony I knew it was my chance to help save both of you. Little did I know you were in on it as well."

"So that's why you did whatever she told you?"

"Yes, that why I did her bidding, and let her kiss me… and bring a rose to your friend Cook at the hospital."

I looked away immediately at the mention of Cook, hoping beyond hope that Emily was about to tell me she had nothing to do with his death.

"I swear I had nothing to do with that Naomi, I would have helped him if I could."

I nodded absently, feeling sick to my stomach once again. Her explanation certainly seemed feasible, but it was also a backstory that could have easily been orchestrated to manipulate me once again. I hated to think that she would lie to Katie, but maybe Katie wasn't so trustworthy either. Fuck, I hated that she was doing this to me. Making me so fucking paranoid I felt like I couldn't trust anyone. It was a dilemma I couldn't shake. I wanted to believe her, I really did, but given her track record I just didn't know if I could do it.

"Naomi," I heard her whisper, interrupting my reverie and scooting even closer to me and looking into my eyes, "I know everything between us has been fucked up from the start. I manipulated and lied to you, and I probably don't deserve another chance. But you make me feel things I never thought were possible… I've never felt anything like the way I feel about you. Please…do you think you can forgive me?"

She looked at me with hope shining in her eyes, and part of me wanted so badly to scoop her up in my arms and tell her we could have a happily ever after. But I just couldn't do it.

"I don't know, Em," I responded sadly, "everything you just told me seems possible… but how do I know you're telling the truth this time?"

"That's fair," she responded sadly, tears shining in her eyes and repressed sobs beginning to shake her body, "I understand that you can't trust me yet."

"I'm sorry Emily," I responded sadly, letting go of her hands and standing up to leave her sitting on the bed alone.

"Naomi please," she begged, jumping to her feet after me, "all I'm asking is for a chance to prove to you that you can trust me."

"I don't know if I can give you that," I answered sadly, unable to meet her eyes as she was full out crying now. "I'm sorry Emily, but you don't know how fucking hard it is for me to be so bloody in love with you that I can't even see straight when you're near and still not be able to trust you."

I heard her freeze, and I turned to look at her to see her looking at me with a heartbreaking expression in her eyes. Tears trickled down her face as she held back a sob, "you love me?"

I was unable to ignore the urges of my body any longer, so I took a tentative step towards her. I reached out and cupped her tear-stained cheeks with my bandaged hands. She leaned into the touch, and let out a sound that sounded like a mix between a sob and sigh as I brushed a few of her tears away with my thumb. Her hands came to rest on my shoulders, which I quickly realized were shaking with sobs of my own. She brought her forehead to gently rest against mine as we cried together over the terrible situation we had found ourselves in.

"In all my life," I finally answered, "I 've never loved anything else." And I meant it. Of course I meant it. I mean sure, I loved Cook. I really and truly did, but that was a different kind of love. This was an earthshattering, mindblowing, end all to be all love that I couldn't control, no matter how hard I tried. And I had definitely never felt this before. Her grip on my shoulders tightened and she let out a gut wretching sob before trying to speak once again.

"I…I lo…"

"Don't," I interrupted before she could get it out by placing my fingers lightly over her lips.

"Why not?" she asked, her eyes glistening as she looked at me with devastation in her eyes.

"Because I can't bare to hear it… not when I'm not ready to believe it."

Her body shook heavily as she continued to cry, and she pulled me closer so she could wrap her arms around my neck and sob into my shoulder. I knew I should pull away, but I needed to be close to her as much as she needed to be close to me right now.

"I wish things were different… I wish I could change it all… but I do. I really do… and I'll prove it," she told me, her shaky voice barely above a whisper.

"I hope so," was all I could managed to get out back as I continued to let her sob into my shoulder. I buried my face in her neck trying to fight off more tears of my own.

"God this is insane," I mumbled into her shoulder, chuckling despite myself.

"What is?" she asked, sounding confused as she pulled back to look at me.

"This… us… me. I mean how can I be so in love with you… yet I barely even know you," I told her, rest my forhead against hers.

"Well, my favorite color is blue, and I love to read. I played the cello when I was younger, my favorite band is The Decemberists, and my one dream has always been to fall in love and run away to Costa Rica and make love on the beach and…"

"Shhh," I interrupted her as she was full on crying in the middle of her words now, "I'm sorry Emily, but you can't just riddle off everything you can think of and expect that to work."

She nodded, shaking her head to hold back a sob and reached up to place her hands on either side of my neck.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, "I just… I want you to know me…"

I pulled her into another hug as she began to cry softly once again. I was trying to maintain my composure, despite all of the things I was feeling, but I was completely overwhelmed when I inhaled her scent. Fuck, I couldn't take it anymore, my feelings were overtaking my good senses and before I knew what I was doing I had pulled back so we were face to face once again. I brought my hand up to her cheek and brushed a stray piece of her hair out of her eyes. Her tear filled eyes shone with a strange mix of apprehension and desire as I continued to drink her in. Fuck, I missed her, I really did. And suddenly I felt like she had lit me on fire.

"What are you doing?" she asked, moving closer to me as I continued to lightly stroke her jaw line. I felt like we were magnetized to each other. I couldn't manage to pull away, not that I wanted to at the moment. She was so close I could feel her uneven breath against my lips. God, this was wrong. It was so fucking wrong, but why did something so wrong feel so amazing?

"I don't know," I answered honestly, "I just… I just…"

And with that our lips crashed together in a frantic kiss. She moaned into the kiss and immediately slipped her tongue into my mouth to duel with my own. Fuck me, I had almost forgotten how good she tasted. The passion engulfed me completely as I squeezed her arse and lifted her up so her legs could wrap around my waist. We stumbled forward and collapsed onto the bed into a mess of tangled limbs without breaking our kiss. I could feel her fingers trailing a blazing path underneath my shirt from my lower back until she finally dug her nails into my shoulder blades. She broke our kiss and yanked my shirt off over my head as I reached down to attack her neck with my kiss swollen lips. I sucked and nipped at her neck, causing her to let out loud moans of appreciation. When I bit down almost hard enough to break the skin, she let out a strangled cry and flipped me over so she was straddling me.

I looked up at her and saw that her eyes were even darker than usual and her flushed chest was heaving with her rapid breathing. The way she looked at me, god, I felt like my heart was going to explode. Somehow, at that very moment, I felt like nothing else existed in the world apart from us. She leaned down again and placed a soft, teasing kiss on my lips before speaking.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" she asked through ragged breath, her lips brushing against mine with every word she spoke.

"No," I answered honestly, "but… but…"

"What?" she asked, leaning back to look in my eyes, but continuing to gyrate her hips suggestively and stroke my collar bone.

"I just… _fuuuuck…_I…I can't stand it" I told her, grabbing the back of her neck and kissing her fiercly again, "I can't."

"It's okay," she mumbled between kisses as things between us continued to get more heated. I could feel the heat from her centre against my leg as she continued to thrust her hips as we attacked each other mouths. Finally, I flipped her over once again, wanting to be dominant, and ripped her shirt off over her head only to be surprised when it revealed her perfect tits as well as her creamy white skin. She smirked devilishly at me as I drunk her in, and I lay back on top of her quickly to relish the feeling of her skin against mine. Within seconds I had made my way down to her breasts and had taken one of her nipples in my mouth as she moaned in pleasure above me. Her hands made their way to my back and she undid my bra, pushing me off of her a little so she could pull it all the way off.

She grabbed my neck and forcefully brought our lips together once again. I began to undo my own jeans, unable to stand not being as close to her as possible anymore. If this was going to be the last time I ever got to touch her like this, I was fucking well going to make the most of it. I quickly kicked my jeans and knickers off, before turning my attention to Emily's shorts. I kissed my way down her torso until I was at her navel, before quickly unbuttoning her jeans and pushing them off of her creamy white legs. Without wasting a moment, I slithered back up her body to taste her lips once more. As her naked body writhed below me, I could feel sparks shooting out of every place our bodies met.

"God, I missed you so much," she whispered so huskily against my lips that I suddenly felt wetter than I ever thought possible.

The only answer I gave was by thrusting two fingers inside of her, causing eyes to roll back in her head as she cried out in pleasure.

"Fuck Naomi," she breathed against my mouth before biting down on my bottom lip. I thrusted to deeply into her, enjoying the feeling of being inside of her once again as she writhed and moaned in pleasure below me. Jesus, she was so fucking wet. Her nails were digging in to my back hard enough to break the skin as I pumped in and out of her. Her fingers wound their way into my blond locks and she pulled me to her for another rough and sloppy kiss.

"Fuck, I love the way you feel inside of me," she cried before roughly biting down on my lip.

She was panting now between her moans and cries, and I started to increase my rhythm. A thin veil of sweat was coating both of us now as I continued to work her into a frenzy. She was muttering random curse words intermingled with my name as I continued to suck and bite her neck. I began to brush my thumb against her clit in perfect rhythm with my thrusts and I felt her entire body start to shake. She was close.

With her hands still tangled in my hair, she yanked me upwards so we were face to face once again. When I looked at her her eyes were so dark there was barely any brown left in them. She struggled to kiss me as her body had begun thrashing uncontrollably under my touch. I tried to move down to her tits but she held me firmly in place. She looked into my eyes as she began to fall over the edge, and I watched as her eyes bulged out and she let out a slightly strangled scream. Her walls clamped down around my fingers and I could feel her entire body shaking. She tried to keep eye contact with me for as long as she could, but eventually she had to squeeze her eyes shut as her climax continued to rip through her. I held her through it all, marvelling at how beautiful she was as she thrashed and shook below me.

Eventually, her body went from shaking wildly to simply trembling, and I carefully removed my fingers from inside her. Her eyes were still tightly shut as I leaned in to give her lips a soft kiss while she continued to breathe raggedly. She finally opened her eyes and I immediately noticed they were filled with unshed tears.

"Hey, hey," said with genuine concern, "why are you crying?"

"I'm sorry," she whispered back as a few of the tears began to trickle down her face, "it's just… that was amazing… and I…I don't want it to be goodbye."

I didn't know how to respond to that, so I simply leaned forward and kissed her softly. The kiss wasn't filled with a promise, or hope, or anything like that. It was a kiss that said that no matter what happened, I would always remember her.

And then I let her cry.

* * *

A few hours later, after Emily had cried herself to sleep, I found myself lying awake wondering if I had just made the biggest mistake of my life. I had given in to my carnal desires for a woman I wasn't sure I could trust. For a woman I loved but was scarcely sure I knew. It was amazing, there was no doubt about that. Even now as she lay next to me with her naked body pressed against my side it was like there was an electric current between us. But if I couldn't trust her, I had given her the advantage over me. If I could trust her, but couldn't be with her after everything that had happened, I had given her false hope. Fuck, I was such a twat sometimes.

Slowly and carefully, I untangled myself from Emily's grasp. She let out a small groan of protest, but I knew she was still asleep. I picked my clothes up off the floor and threw them on as quickly as I could. I needed some air. I glanced back at Emily who was still sleeping peacefully, causing me to smile despite myself, and slipped out of the room.

I made my way to the living room, glad that it was still dark so I was unlikely to face someone who had overheard me loudly fucking Emily just a few hours ago. I slipped through the open door onto the balcony and let out a small sigh when the cool air hit my body. It was that time of night where the sun was only just barely beginning to rise so the sky had sort of a dakr purplish tint to it. I felt like screaming into the night air, but I knew I was chancing waking everyone up by doing that.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I mouthed quietly as I ran my fingers through my hair. Things were so fucked up, I hardly knew what move to play next. I wasn't ready to forgive Emily and move on together, but how was I supposed to act around her now? How was I supposed to explain to her that I had fucked her brains out but I still wasn't sure if I could be with her again? How could I justify my actions?

"God Cook, I wish you were here so you could have stopped me from being such a fucking twat," I whispered into the night air. Fuck I missed him. Even if he couldn't have stopped me, he would have at least been able to help me now. If only that bitch Effy hadn't... wait. I stopped and turned around, staring at the balcony door as if it were some foreign object.

Why was it open when I came out?

I rushed back into the living room, franctically scanning for any sign of her. My eyes finally settled on the empty chair with her restraints strung around it.

Effy had escaped.


	23. Blueprint

**I know what you're all thinking. Two Electric Feel updates in just over a day? No way. It much an authors note? Or a soundtrack? Maybe fg lost her mind and it's some insane rambling? No my dear friends, it is in fact an update (although whether it is also an insane rambling can be debated as well). Luckily for you (but not so lucky for me) I had to call in sick to work today as I've come down which something. I am glad though that I managed to finish this chapter so quickly for you all. I wish I could thank each and every one of you individually for your comments and compliments that you consistently give me chapter after chapter. But as I am always short on time, I hope that my writing will serve as thanks enough. I cannot tell you all how important you've been to this story becoming what it is.**

**This one goes out, specifically, to all the fans of Psycho Effy. I am quite fond of her myself, and I think by the end of this chapter at least a few of you will realize who she is sort of an homage to.**

* * *

"Everybody get the fuck up!" I screamed as I frantically ran through the halls of Freddie's flat.

I started beating on random doors as I ran through, making sure everyone got the message that they needed to get their asses out of bed. I couldn't believe this had fucking happened. I started to hear grumbling voices coming down the hallway as I got back into the living room to wait for everyone. How was it possible that Effy had snuck out without anyone noticing? Effy was a sneaky bitch, but everyone must have been dead asleep to not have heard her escape her restraints.

Or having sex.

Fucking hell, was it possible that Emily had came with the intention of distracting me? How would that make sense? Unless Emily had hit Effy and tied her up so that we would trust her and then she could bring us down from the inside out. Maybe this whole thing had been a conspiracy to gain our trust and then destroy us… fucking hell. I rubbed my temples frantically, once again more confused than my brain could possibly handle. I started hearing doors opening and sleepy voices getting closer and closer as I paced about the room. Freddie appeared first, quick followed by Panda and JJ. They rubbed their eyes sleepily and peered out me through their barely half open lids with confusion and annoyance.

"Naomi, what the fuck?" Freddie asked finally as the rest of the group made their way into the kitchen.

"She fucking escaped," I told them, my voice even and quiet even though I felt anything but calm.

"What, who?" Panda asked, barely aware that I was even speaking to her.

I looked around at their tired faces and pointed to the empty chair where Effy had been restrained incredulously. Their faces immediately widened with shock as realization finally kicked in, and they gasped as if they were a studio audience in a court room drama.

"How the fuck did that happen?" I heard Emily's voice question, and I turned to face her immediately, all of my anger and humiliation at her likely betrayel flaming through my body.

"As if you don't know," I spat at her, causing her eyes to widen in shock at the tone of my voice, "this was your plan all along, I should have fucking known."

She shook her head frantically and stepped towards me, making a grab for me but I stepped out of her reach. Her eyes shone with devastation.

"Naomi, please, it's not what you think," she tried, pleading desperately with me.

"Oh isn't it?" I scoffed at her, "and why should I believe you? God I'm so fucking stupid, I can't believe I really started to believe I could trust you."

"What's going on?" Freddie interrupted, looking back and forth between us as I seethed with anger and Emily cowered in devastation.

"Go on, tell them Emily," I implored, "tell them how you came into my room and seduced me so Effy could escape unnoticed."

"Naomi, I didn't… I swear…"

"Oh please," I countered, rolling my eyes in annoyance, "you knew fucking well that my room was the only one close enough to the living room to hear her if she tried to escape."

"You wait just a minute bitch," I heard Katie inteject, stepping protectively in front of her sister, "you keep talking about my sister like that and I'll feed your lungs to fucking pack of dogs, I don't care how she feels about you."

"Fuck off Katie, how do we know you're not in on this too?" I asked stepped closer to her as I watched the anger bubble in her face.

"Naomi… don't you think you're getting a little paranoid?" I heard JJ inteject sheepishly from the corner.

"A little paranoid?" I asked incredulously, "What reason could I possibly have to be paranoid? Could it be that my best friend is dead? And the same people that killed him are trying to kill me too? And the only people in whole fucking world I have to trust are a group of strangers I barely even know? One of which stalked me for weeks, and another who's lied to me so much I can't be sure a single word out of her mouth is true."

My shoulders slumped and I turned away from them, struggling to hold back tears.

"Fucking hell, I feel like I'm losing my mind," I whispered to myself more than anyone else.

"I understand you're upset," I heard Freddie say as she stepped towards me, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder and causing me to recoil slightly from his touch, "but we've got to trust each other if this is going to work. Effy escaping is a setback, yes, but blaming Emily and Katie won't do it any good. Right now we need to worry about executing our plan before they get to us first."

I nodded, despite how I really felt about the situation. I didn't know if I could trust any of them, but with any luck it would be all over tonight.

"Now," Freddie addressed everyone else, "let's give Naomi a moment to breathe and we'll meet in the dining room to discuss our plan of action for tonight. Come on then."

I heard them all shuffle out of the room and I let out a sigh of relief that I was alone again at last. Without looking back, I made my way out to the balcony to get a breath of fresh air. I immediately leaned my elbows on the railing and buried my face in my hands, stifling a scream of frustration. I felt a presence behind me, interrupting my moment of quiet contemplation and I let out a sigh as she spoke.

"Do you really think that last night was about manipulating you?" I heard Emily ask softly behind me.

"I don't know what to think anymore," I answered after a second and turned around to face her. I felt my heart sink as I saw that her eyes were filled with unshed tears; she looked absolutely crestfallen. She was wearing the same shorts and tshirt I had ripped from her body only hours ago, and I felt my stomach shudder as I noticed the angry mark I had left on her neck.

"Naomi, last night meant the world to me," she told me, her voice shaking as she stepped towards me, "I would never use you to help Effy escape… I would never put you in danger like that."

I looked away from her, shaking my head. I wanted to believe her, I really did, but I knew it was something I could not do.

"Last night was a mistake," I responded, my voice even and calm despite the fact that I felt like I was ripping my own heart in two. I made my move past her through the balcony door.

"Naomi please!" I heard her sob after me. I stopped for a second, and it took all the resolve I had left in me to not turn back. Instead, I left her crying alone on the balcony.

* * *

A few hours later, Freddie had debriefed us on the entire plan. It had been, admittedly, hard for me to pay attention to with Emily's heartbroken eyes staring forleornly at me from across the table, but I was pretty sure I had gotten the gist of it. Emily and Katie had aptly informed us that Tony would be spending the next few days at his estate just outside of Bristol. There, JJ would use his technical knowledge to tap into the security system to shut off all of the safeguards and play a looped tape over the moniters to fool the guards. Next, Freddie, Panda, and I would scale to the top of the building and Freddie would lower us into the study where, according to Katie, Tony usually kept his "memory box." Then, with Katie and Emily waiting in the van for our getaway, we would escape into the night to deliver the information to Thomas at the station. With the evidence against him, as well as written testimonials from Katie and Emily and Panda's undercover case file, we would be able to bring Tony and his entire empire down without shedding a single drop of blood. Then, of course, we would take off to various destinations across the world. Freddie had booked us all open jawed tickets, which made me seriously wonder, not for the first time, where that bloke was getting all of his money. It seemed to be a solid plan, and I was especially excited that JJ had managed to obtain headset radios for us to communicate with each other. What? I think that stuff is cool.

Anyway, it was about an hour before we were schedualed to leave when I found myself sitting on the edge of a bed in one of Freddie's rooms, dressed in all black like a fucking cat burgler. I couldn't believe that in just a few hours all of this would be over. What would I do then? I would have completed my task and avenged Cook's death. All of these people that I was with right now, the deep seated need to bringing the Stonem's down that held us all together would be gone, and we would all go our separate ways. Something about that thought unsettled me greatly. Maybe it was because I had no one else, and this band of strangers had become the only people even remotely close to someone I could call a friend. Or maybe it was because I would be saying goodbye to the only woman I ever loved, resigning myself to a life of lonlieness and what ifs. I didn't want that, but I didn't know if I could reconcile my opposing feelings in time to be able to tell her I didn't want her to go.

I flopped back on the bed, sighing heavily, and squeezed my eyes shut. It was the eleventh hour now, and the clock was ticking. And for the few moments I had left, I just wanted some peace of mind.

* * *

The hour passed quickly and we soon found ourselves parked inconspicuously a few yards away from the front gate to the Stonem estate. We all sat in laboured silence as JJ typed away furiously on his laptop. I was nervous, there was no doubt about that. And I wasn't the only one. Panda was sitting in the passanger seat, fidgeting nervously with her hands, while Freddie tapped his foor incessently in the driver's seat. Emily and Katie were huddled together in the back with Emily resting her head on her sister's shoulder. I was sat across from them, trying to keep myself distracted by counting the number of dents on the vans interior walls.

"I'm in!" JJ shouted suddenly startling all of us, "alarms are down and surveillance cameras are a playing a looped tape, we're all set."

We all shared a look of apprehension before Freddie broke the silence.

"Alright, game time. Ems, Katie… we'll be back before you know it," Freddie told them as he jumped out of the van. "Wait for my signal," he told myself and Panda as he made his way towards the single guard at the front gate.

"Excuse me!" we heard him shout in a fake southern American accent, "I seem to have gotten lost out here sir, would you be able to tell me how to get back to the big city." Freddie shoved a map of Bristol in the big mans' face and as he examined it, we watched Freddie take a syringe out of his pocket and jam it into the guard's neck. Within seconds he fell heavily to the ground and Freddie waved us over. I shot a nervous look over at Panda and took a deep breath.

"That's our cue," I said, earning a nod from Panda, "let's get this over with."

Panda hopped out the passenger door and slid open the side door to let me out. I made my move to jump out of the van but before I could get out I felt a soft hand delicately grab my wrist. I turned back to find Emily kneeling in front of me, gripping my wrist tightly now.

"I don't care if you hate me, or if you don't believe me," she told me, her voicing shaking heavily, "but I can't let you go in there without… without…"

Suddenly she grabbed me and with her fingers winding through my blonde locks, she pulled me in for a deep kiss. Her lips moved against mine, and her tongue slipped into my mouth immediately. I felt myself kissing back with just as much passion, as if it were the last time I would ever get the chance to. She was holding me as if she never wanted to let me go, but I reluctantly pulled away and leaned my forehead against hers.

"I love you," she whispered, leaning in to kiss me softly one more time.

I didn't have a response, I just simply nodded as I tried my best to hold back the tears that were rapidly springing to my eyes.

"Please, just come back alive so I can show you I mean it," she added, and it was my turn to lean in and kiss her. I smiled at her and tenderly stroked my finger along her jaw line, because despite everything that was wrong between us she still meant everything to me.

"I'll try my best," I whispered genuinely as I pulled away, running off after Freddie and Panda who were frantically telling me to hurry the fuck up. I glanced back only once at Emily who had placed one hand on her lips and one over her heart as she watched me walk away from her. Right before I turned away, I saw Katie pull her in for a hug, and I sighed, glad that she had Katie to take care of her even if I never could.

The three of us ran through the massive front yard as fast as we could, using the trees and brush as cover so we wouldn't alert anyone who may have been watching of our presence. Within moments we made it to the side of the massive building, and Freddie used the grabbling hook to secure the rope to the top and began climbing. Panda followed immediately and reluctantly followed her. I had never been a fan of heights, but I figured in our current situation, that was the least of my worries.

After several grueling moments on the rope, we made it to the top. Freddie quickly told the others over our radio that we had made it, and we quickly received the all clear from JJ to proceed. Panda carefully opened the sun window to the study, and Freddie immediately tossed the rope he would use to lower us inside. Panda, of course, volunteered to go in first, because as bubbly and strange as she was, she was certainly a brave one.

"See you down there, Naomi," she winked as Freddie clipped her in and began to lower her into the room. I watched as Panda sunk lower and lower into the study before finally touching down softly and giving us a thumbs up. Freddie immediately turned to hook me in.

"Alright Naomi?" he asked as he clipped the rope to my belt.

"Yeah," I answered somewhat apprehensively, "just excited for all of this to be over."

"You and me both babe," Freddie replied with a smile as he began to lower me into to room. Within seconds I felt Panda hands on my waist to help me to the ground.

"Alright JJ, we're in," Panda said over the radio as she glanced around the room.

"Okay," came JJ's slightly cracked voice. Fucking hell, I thought police radios were supposed to be state of the art. "Katie says that in the left corner of the room there should be large oak bookshelf."

We both spun around quickly and spotted it.

"We see it," I responded quickly, moving across the room with Panda hot on my heels.

"Okay, well push it aside and you should see a safe in the wall."

Panda and I nodded at each other and moved the shelf to push it together. Fucking hell it was heavy. Why did Tony need so many books anyway? I doubted he had much spare time between running an empire, dealing drugs, and running peoples lives to read a murder mystery by James Patterson. When we finally got the bloody thing out of the way, we spotted the safe JJ had told us about.

"Okay we see it hun," Panda told him over the radio.

"You'll need to crack the combination Panda," he told her and she suddenly produced a stethescope.

"This will only take a moment, you stand guard," Panda instructed as she set to work. I stepped towards the door, trying not to be too distracted by the glamour and sheer size of the room we were currently invading. Fucking hell, I knew Tony was probably rich but I didn't realize he was this loaded. I was off in my own little world of wonder, and doing a terrible job of standing guard when Panda shouted that she had cracked the safe. I made my way back over and my eyes widened as I watched her carefully remove the item we were seeking. Tony's memory chest. The sick, sadistic, ego-driven piece of evidence that would put Tony Stonem and his whole gang of followers behind bars for a very long time.

"We've got it," Panda said over the radio with a smile in my direction which I readily returned. How could I not smile when this was so close to being over. Panda walked over to the rope and hooked it in, signaling to Freddie to take it up. Freddie pulled the box to safety and gave us a thumbs up. Panda turned to me with an earsplitting grin as Fredie began to lower the rope again.

"Brill job, innit Naomi?" Panda said with a smile, "we did it!"

She stuck her hand in the air to give me a high five and I smiled raising my own hand to oblige. But before our hands could connect I heard a loud bang. I watched, almost as if time had moved into slow motion, as Panda froze with her hand in mid air, her eyes widening. I watched as a single trickle of blood spilled out of her nose. I watched as she attempted to take a breath but only managed to make a strangled choking sound. I watched as she twitched before her body fell lifelessly to the floor with a dull thud. I could hear Freddie screaming above me and JJ frantically questioning what had happened over the radio, but it was all white noise. I dragged my eyes across the room to find no other than Effy standing with a smoking pistol pointed at the spot where Panda had once stood.

"Hey hun," she said with an evil smirk, "miss me?"

With that she lunged towards me at full force, and I immediately held up my hands to screen myself against her attack. We collided and flew back across the room, smacking into one of the walls as I fought her of me. I rapidly delivered a swift right hook to her jaw and wrestled the gun out of her hands, throwing it across the room.

"Get the fuck out of here Freddie," I screamed to him as Effy elbowed me in the ribs.

"I'm not fucking leaving you," he shouted down, looking about ready to jump into the fight himself.

I pushed Effy back and delivered a three punch combination ending with a preceisely aimed uppercut, mentally thanking Cook for making me take Kenpo classes with him. Effy stumbled back with a groan and fell to the floor.

"I'll be fine, you getting out of here is more important," I yelled to Freddie before being lunged at by Effy once again. We landed hard on top of a wooden table with Effy pining my wrists above my head.

"Ooh yeah baby," she said mockingly, "I love it when you fight dirty."

"Freddie get the fuck out of here!" I shouted to him one last time as I kicked Effy off of me and jumped back to my feet. I looked up at Freddie once again, and he looked so unbelievably torn I wasn't sure what he was going to do.

"Freddie don't you dare leave her there," I heard Emily frantically shout over the radio.

"He has to Emily," I told her without missing a beat, "what he has is more important than me."

"Ooh Emily?" Effy asked, grinning like a devil, "tell her I said hi."

And with that she delivered a swift roundhouse kick to my chest, sending me flying back and crash landing into a book shelf. I groaned in pain as hundreds of heavy books crashed down on top of me and I could feel the blood seeping out of my nose and the gash on my forehead.

"Freddie go!" I screamed with finality as I got to my feet and made another lunge at Effy. I watched out of the corner of my eye as he let out a frustrated scream and told them he was on his way down. I could hear Emily shouting at him over the radio but he ignored her. And I was thankful.

Effy delivered a swift knee to my stomach causing me to fall to me knees and spit blood on the floor. Then she delivered a strong to kick to my face, sending me flying flat on my back. Within second she had jumped on top of me, straddling my waist.

"Oh babe," she whispered, leaning forward to lick me from my chin to my forehead, causing me to shudder in disgust, "don't you know our house just isn't a home without you."

Emily was still screaming frantically in my ear, but my hearing was getting fuzzy and I couldn't make out what she was saying anymore. Effy grabbed the earpiece and brought it to her lips with an evil smirk.

"I'm sorry, Naomi can't come to the phone right now, but if you leave a detailed message she'll be sure to get back to you when she can."

And with that she snapped the headpiece like a twig.

"Poor poor Naomi," she said, setting her attention back on me, "don't you know that only good girls get to play with the tea party. And you want to play tea party, don't you Naomi?"

Her words only served to remind me that this woman was completely, utterly insane.

Before I had a chance to make a remark, her fist connected with my face again.

The last thing I thought of before everything went black, was Emily.

* * *

**Poor Naomi, always getting knocked out. You'd swear she was Rupert Giles or something.**

**I just have to say, that killing Panda was one of the hardest things I had to do in this story. Why, you ask? Well, because it was something I hadn't planned from the beginning. Unlike Cook's death, and almost everything that happened in this story, I hadn't planned on it all along. But the more and more I wrote of this, the more I realized I had to kill another person to get the story where it needed to go. So unfortunately, our dear Panda got the short straw.**

**There are still two more chapter left to this, as I decided to extend it a little. The next chapter will come soon... but don't expect it tomorrow or anything :).**

**As always, let me know what you think... or I'll send Psycho Effy after you :)**

**Cheers!**


	24. Zorbing

**Once again thanks to everyone who commented on the last chapter and sent me private messages. Alot of you made some interesting comments and fantastic insights that I will address in my authors note once this story ends.**

**Second last chapter. This one, like the last two is quite long which I'm sure you'll be appreciative of. But I can tell you right now take a breath and prepare yourself before reading this one, it's really intense. The next one is the finale, but this is the penultimate chapter. I already know how this is going to end, but I would love to hear all of your imputs after this chapter. I'm sure there will be many.**

**The title song is Zorbing by Stornoway and I know I always tell you guys to listen to the title song, but this time you really really should. At the climax of this chapter. Such beautiful song, and I imagine the first part playing when it's just the vocals and bass. I'm sure you'll understand where it was supposed to be played when you read the chapter.**

**Have you taken that breath?**

**Alright, let's do it.**

* * *

As my vision came slowly back to me, the first thing I realized was that I was once again restrained. This time, however, I knew for sure it was the Stonem's who had me there. I could still taste my own blood in my mouth as I looked around the massive room I was currently trapped in. Despite its' giant size, I quickly realized it seemed to be some sort of office. The chair I was tied to was facing a large mahogany desk and behind that was another chair that was spun around to face a massive window. I was trying not to move as every muscle in my body seemed to be screaming in pain. Man that psycho Effy bitch could really fucking fight.

I cringed slightly as the severity of the situation I was currently in began to set in. Presuming Freddie and the gang had managed to get away, they had gotten what they needed and the likelihood that they were coming back for me was slim to none. I wanted so badly to believe that Emily would swoop in and save me, but I knew I had very little reason to believe that. Even if she did love me, the chance that she would risk her life and the lives of others to save me after they had what they needed to bring Tony down was very small. This was real life, not a fantasy. I had met the girl, I had loved the girl, I had lost the girl, and now I was going to die. That was my story. But at least I could say that I experienced what it was like to love someone enough to die for them before my life ended. And whether she meant it or not, she told me she loved me too. That knowledge was something I would hold onto until my last breath.

I would be with Cook soon, and poor Panda. I felt physically sick as I thought about her.

I had watched the light go out of her eyes.

I felt my body start to shake with a combination of fear and grief and I tried desperately to prevent myself from making any noise. I wanted to enjoy these precious moments I had before they realized I was awake. They were, after all, most likely the last moments of life I would ever experience. People say when you're about to die your whole life flashes before your eyes, but that wasn't really what happened to me. I just kept imagining Emily. Sweet Emily, with whom I could have had something exceptionally special. Emily who had hurt and lied to me so many times, and taught me that sometimes love was unconditional. Emily who I hoped would have a happy life free from the evil of Stonems, even if it was without me. I swore in that moment, against all hope, that if I ever made it out of here alive I would make it work with her, if she'd have me. I would learn to trust her again if it took me a life time. And I would tell her I loved her every day for the rest of our lives.

"Ah you're awake," a familiar male voice stated, cutting through my reverie. In my surprise, I whipped my head around to see who had joined me which caused me to yelp loudly as a sharp pain shot through my neck.

"I see my Effy did a good job on you then," he added smugly before stepping into my line of vision.

Fucking Tony.

I eyed him up for a moment and couldn't help but think that it seemed odd that a man that looked like he did could be so cruel and powerful. In all honesty, he looked like the boy next door not someone who dealt drugs, ruined lives, and murdered people, among other things.

"We haven't been properly introduced have we, Miss Campbell," he said, sticking out his hand towards me, "Tony Stonem, ever so pleased to make your acquaintance."

I stared at him with my eyebrow quirked for a moment before he looked down at his hand and at me and burst into a fit of laughter. I guess craziness runs in the family.

"Sorry, sorry," he apologized as he continued to chuckle, "how silly of me. Always making an arse out of myself I am, clearly."

"Fine, introductions are made, think you can just kill me now?" I asked, speaking for the first time.

"Kill you?" he asked, his features twisting up into something resembling shock and amusement, "my dear I have no intentions of killing you… at least not right now."

"Then what the fuck do you want from me?" I questioned him, venom lacing my words.

"I don't want anything from you, love… although I have to admit I do want to see you dead sometime in the near future," he answered, seeming to ponder over his words before continuing, "but as of right now, you my dear are my ticket to retrieving my most prized possession and escaping persecution by the law."

"And how is that?" I wondered out loud, my brow furrowing in confusion.

"My dear girl," he laughed, "maybe you are stupid after all. You didn't think they would come back for you did you?"

I didn't respond, letting him continue.

"Approximately one hour ago I made a phone call to your friends telling them that the only way they would ever see you alive again would be for Freddie, Katie, and Emily to bring my box back without any police accompaniment and deliver it to me personally. Little do they know that they won't be getting out alive either, but I digress."

"They'll never fall for that," I spat at him, "this is too important to them… seeing you rot in prison is well worth my life."

"Maybe to Freddie and Katie," Tony countered without missing a beat "but not to Emily. And if Emily wants to save you, then Katie wants to save you and she will make the others agree with her."

"What makes you think Emily thinks I'm worth it?"

He laughed loudly then, almost doubling over as I stared at him like he was some sort of maniac.

"Okay that sorts it," he said, still chuckling, "you really are stupid. My dear girl, don't you realize how in love with you that girl is?"

I felt my heart begin to flutter despite myself, but I continued to listen.

"I knew it right away from the moment she looked at you that you were the one she thought would save her," he told me, looking away from me out the massive window behind his desk, "but to me, I saw you as someone who could help me keep her. And by helping me keep her, you would be helping me keep Katie… which is why I took a particular interest in her bringing you on board."

"What do you mean keep them?"

"Katie and Emily, despite their faults, were great workers and they knew a lot of my secrets. To be quite honest I really didn't want to have to kill them, especially since Katie has that rare "right hand man" quality I so desire to aid me. I figured if I could get you to work for me as well they would both be content with staying here. But then, of course, that bastard McClair tipped you off and my impulsive nutter of a sister offed your friend Cook. Then, I knew the only chance I had to keep my girls was to kill you."

"So why didn't you?" I asked, genuinely confused as to why he didn't just off me right away.

"I was going to, believe me," he looked at me again, this time looking positively wicked, "but once again my sister went and ruined it for me by rushing off and getting herself kidnapped," he added bitterly causing me to chuckle a little bit. "But the good part of that was that I realized I had lost my hold over the Fitchs as Katie had been betraying me all along. So I decided to wait for you all to come to me and take you out all at once."

"So you expected us to break in here?" I asked him incredulously.

"I counted on it," he answered, smiling manically and standing up to walk towards me once again, "of course I didn't anticipate any of you actually managing to steal my most prized possession. But alas, that was only a minor setback. When your friends get here, I'll cover my tracks once and for all. And teach those fucking Fitch girls that you don't mess with Tony Stonem and get away with it."

He stopped in front of me, leaning forward so we were face to face. I could feel his breath on my face and it made me feel positively nauseous that he was so close to me.

"I wonder what would be more fun," he said, smirking maliciously, "killing you in front of her, or killing her in front of you."

"You fucking bastard," I screamed, spitting in his face. He responded by slapping me hard across my already damaged face, causing me to cry out loudly in pain.

"Now," he said, glancing towards the door and making a beckoning motion with his hand, "whatever shall we do to pass the time before our friends join us?"

With that, Effy appeared in my line of vision looking a bit worse for the wear but not nearly as bad as I was. She shot me her trademark smirk as she took her place next to her brother.

"I'll leave you girls alone, play nice," he told her before nodding towards me, "be seeing you soon."

I turned to watch him as he left me with the sociopath he called a sister, and I almost felt like screaming for him to come back. As nuts as he was, he was nothing compared to what he had left me with.

"Hello darling," she practically whispered, dragging her fingernail down my forearm, "time to play."

She straddled the chair I was sitting in and pulled out a fag, immediately lighting it and blowing smoke directly into my face. I cringed away from her as she leaned forward so our foreheads were almost touching. Suddenly I felt a searing pain in my forearm and I screamed in agony as I realized she had put her cigarette out on my arm. I should have fucking known that by play she meant she was going to bloody torture me.

She tossed her head back and laughed wickedly before she grabbed my cheeks and made me look at her.

"You liked that baby, didn't you," she asked, smirking like the maniac she was. When I didn't respond she drew back and slapped me as hard as she could.

"Say you fucking liked it," she repeated, sounding much angrier than she did before. The only response I gave was to yelp loudly at the pain that was still shooting through my arm. She jumped up off of me, looking positively furious. She stormed across the room to a cabinet next to Tony's desk. My eyes widened as I watched her pull out a small but fucking sharp looking knife from one of the compartments.

"What's the matter darling?" she asked, feigning concern as she slowly stalked towards me, "you don't like my knife?"

I shuddered as she brushed the blunt side of the blade against my bare arm. Without warning, the plunged the knife forward and sliced a large gash into my left thigh causing me to scream out in pain once more. She laughed gleefully as she watched the blood pour out onto my torn jeans, and I watched in horror as she wiped some of my blood of with her finger and brought it to her lips.

"Mmmm," she squealed in delight, "this is so fantastic you just have to try it"

She wiped another bit off and brought it to my trembling lips. I tried to keep my mouth closed but she forced her way into my mouth. I cringed as I tasted my own blood, causing Effy to become even more excited.

"Lovely, lovely!" she shrieked, "we're going to have so much fun together."

I tried to leave my own body as she continued to make small incisions on my arms and legs, causing excruciating pain to shoot through me with each of her ruthless movements. I prayed to every god that I could think of that this psycho wouldn't accidently kill me before I got to see Emily again. Everything Tony had said had finally confirmed it; she loved me. She always had, and she really had been just trying to protect me from all of this. She had wanted me to save her, and I swore to myself that if I couldn't I would fucking die trying. I wouldn't let these people win without a fight.

I wailed, but continued to try not to cry as she held the knife up her lighter before plunging it directly into my knee cap. I was sure I was going to black out from the pain soon if she didn't stop, but luckily for me I heard Tony's voice in the distance. It sounded fuzzy and incoherent but I got the sense that he was telling her that she was finished. She threw him a disappointed pout, before she leaned in and bit my bottom lip.

"That was fun, wasn't it?" she asked against my lips. I felt like spitting at her and telling her not to fucking touch me like that again. But I was certain that would cause her to explode with rage and probably kill me, so I just nodded my head as much as I could manage with the pain I was in.

She leapt up and stalked away from me smiling like a satisfied kitten. I heard the door shut a few moments later and I was left alone with only my pain to comfort me.

I had been in and out of consciousness ever since the Stonems had left me in here alone. I was in so much pain at that moment I couldn't localize it, it just felt like my entire body was on fire. That psycho bitch had really done a number on me with her knife, I felt like I had lost a lot of blood. But I was thinking my wounds were starting to close at least a little bit because my episodes of passing out were becoming less and less frequent. Nevertheless, the taste of my own blood was still fresh in my mouth and I could feel it soaking through my clothes.

Beginning to be able to think coherently once again meant I was starting to panic. Emily was on her way right now to foolishly try and save me. Part of me hoped that Freddie and Katie had managed to talk her out of it, or even that Tony was wrong and she wasn't coming in the first place. I guess I was feeling particularly self-sacrificing. But another part of me knew she was coming, because I knew that if the situations were reversed, even after everything that had happened I would still come for her as well.

So I sat and I waited, trying to think up some sort of brilliant plan that would get us out of this mess, with the evidence against Tony, without getting anyone else killed. I sort of chuckled at the idea I would be any good to help anyone in the state I was in. Hell, I wasn't even sure I would be able to stand up at this point. I winced as I tried to move my fingers, fucking hell everything hurt. Hopefully Freddie would come up with some ingenious plan to have the coppers standing by hidden away so that the moment they saved me they could burst in and get Tony. I was assuming Tony was having my friends followed and planned on putting a bullet in my brain if they attempted to turn anything over to the police. But the good news was, I didn't think he knew that JJ was a copper. That could prove to work to our advantage.

After what seemed like a lifetime later, two burly men that I didn't recognize came into the room. I figured they were higher up lackies of Tony's as they worked in his personal dwelling. They untied my restraints without hesitation, I'm sure they weren't scared of me fighting them. Hell even if I wasn't mangled and barely able to move I'm sure I wouldn't have even been able to put a dent in either of them. As they dragged me out of the chair I yelped quietly as pain shot through my entire body. They grabbed an arm each and started to pull me through the room leaving me to have to support myself with my own legs. I was stumbling and using their strength to keep myself upright, but I was surprised by the amount of mobility I had retained. They lead me down a large hallway and I groaned as one of the guards tightened his grip on my arm. Fucking bastard, it wasn't like I was going to try and run away or anything.

We finally made it into another huge room that almost looked like a ballroom. Man they were fucking loaded. Tony and Effy were already there waiting for me, and I quickly noticed that Freddie, Katie and Emily were there as well. Their eyes widened when they saw me being lead in, and judging by their reactions I figured I looked even worse than I felt. Emily covered her mouth in shock, and when the guards threw me to the floor she gasped and took a step towards me only to be restrained by Katie. I landed on my hands and knees with a dull thud and I screwed my eyes shut giving everything I had to stop myself from screaming.

"What the fuck did you do to her?" Emily screamed at them, as Katie tightened her grip on her arm to keep her from lashing out.

"Oh you Fitch girls," Tony said, dodging the question and laughing loudly, "I should have known from the start this would be where we would end up eventually. I should never have let my sentimental side get in the way and spared your lives for so long. I just can't believe after everything I did for you that you could betray me like this."

"Everything you did for us?" Katie echoed incredulously, "you may have given us jobs to get us on our feet Tony, and that we appreciate. But then you practically kept us as prisoners, threatening our lives if we tried to leave to find something better."

"You don't deserve any better," Tony spat at her, "you were garbage when we found you and you'll always be garbage."

"Shut up," I practically whispered from my spot on the floor, unable to make my strained voice any louder.

"What did you say?" Tony sneered, turning towards me looking absolutely vicious.

"I said shut up!" I repeated, managing to give my voice a little more volume.

Before I could say anything else he delivered a swift and powerful kick to my ribs causing me to cry out in pain and spit blood on the floor. I heard Emily screaming and struggling in the background, I assumed both Katie and Freddie were restraining her now.

"And who the fuck do you think you are, Miss Knight in Shining Armor," he spat at me as I lay writhing in pain on the floor, "this would have never happened if it weren't for you. I ought to fucking kill you right now just for the fucking pleasure of it."

"Tony, stop," Effy told him, surprising the fuck out of everyone by being the voice of reason, "make the exchange."

Tony looked over at his sister, and they shared a sinister smirk. He looked over at Freddie who nodded and began to walk forward with the box in hand. I looked up at him pleadingly, trying to convince him with my eyes that he needed to run, but he shot me a reassuring smile. I wanted to believe he had a plan, I really did. The box reached Tony's hands and he giggled with glee as he handed it off to one of his guards who immediately left with it. Before I knew what was happening, the other guard had grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and practically threw me across the room towards Emily and Katie. I landed at their feet and Emily immediately dropped to her knees and scooped me up in her arms. I could feel her tears on my cheek and she held me close to her and dropped a gentle kiss on my forehead. I looked up and found her sparkling brown eyes staring back at me and tried my best to smile at her. She let out a gut wrenching sob and leaned forward, placing a gentle kiss on my lips. Freddie and Katie were now standing protectively over us as Effy and Tony continued to stare us down.

"Aww, isn't that beautiful," Tony fake cooed, "beautiful innit Eff? Lovers reunited at last. Well sorry to make the reunion short lived hon."

Emily and Katie helped me to my feet as Freddie scoffed at him.

"Fuck off Stonem, you got what you wanted and now we're leaving."

"I'm afraid you're not going anywhere," he told us, smiling manically as about twenty burly guards appeared behind him, "I think it's time to take some revenge. You all need to learn that you can't mess with me and get away with it."

The last of his words trailed off to my ears as we were already running before he managed to get anything else out. I was wincing at every second step we made, but with Emily supporting me I was somehow able to keep up.

"Don't worry guys," Freddie told us through ragged breath, "JJ made sure the coppesr would be here to back us up any minute. We just have to get out of here."

"How are you going to get him without the evidence?" I asked, confused.

"For someone really cunning, Tony really isn't all that smart," Freddie replied with a smirk as we turned yet another corner, "we got JJ to photocopy most of the materials from inside my apartment. The only way he's getting away now is if he manages to kill us all."

"In here," Katie yelled suddenly, pulling the three of us into an empty room and shutting the door behind us, "there's a front facing window in here so we can climb out, see the cops have the place surrounded."

I looked into the distance and saw flashing lights just outside the gate, as well as a bunch of darkly dressed coppers making their way towards the building.

"I'll go first," Freddie volunteered, "it isn't that high but we'll need at least two of us down there to help Naomi out."

"Be careful Freds," Katie told him, laying a gentle hand on his shoulder. He nodded at her, smiling encouragingly before popping the window open and slowly climbing down. He was right, it really wasn't that high, but it looked rather cumbersome nonetheless. Katie was quick to follow and Freddie helped her down off the ledge easily. Once she had touched the ground I felt Emily grab my hand. I turned to look at her and she smiled encouragingly and brought my hand to her lips. I winced slightly due to all of my injuries there, but I hid it well.

"Your turn," she said, bringing her other arm around to grasp my hip, "I'll help you up and Freddie and Katie will catch you."

"I don't want to leave you," I answered immediately, looking her directly in the eyes. A lot could happen in the amount of time we would be separated, as short as it was. I didn't want to leave her in there all alone to be attacked once I had been saved. I wanted us to leave together.

"I'll be okay," she told me, spinning me around so we were facing each other once again, "no matter what happens I promise you I will be okay."

She cupped my face with her hands and I nodded sadly, tears slowly streaming down my eyes. I could hear Freddie and Katie yelling for us to hurry up, but I didn't want our moment to end just yet. I leaned forward and captured her lips in a tender kiss.

"Emily… I…"

But before I could finish I was hit from the side and smacked into the wall next to the window, effectively getting the wind knocked out of me. As I struggled to breathe, I looked up, unsurprised to see Effy standing over me. Her smug grin didn't last long though, as before I could even register the movement, a whir of red had knocked her off her feet and onto the floor. I looked over to see Emily on top of her, pinning her to the ground with her knee on her chest.

"Emsy darling," she said with a considerable amount of effort, "so good to see you, it's been so long."

With a lightning fast movement she kicked Emily off of her and jumped back to her feet. Fucking hell, she was like a super villain or something. She stalked towards her as Emily too scrambled to her feet to face her again.

"Why are you doing this Emily," she asked, seeming to be genuinely unable to understand what was going on, "for her?" she asked glancing towards me with a disgusted look on her face.

"You wouldn't understand," Emily responded, looking absolutely fierce.

"What wouldn't I understand?"

"Love," Emily shouted at her before lunging at her and throwing a punch combination that quickly .knocked her to the ground. Without hesitation, Emily grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet.

"Come on" she said as we started to run out of the room, "we're going to have to find another way out of here."

We rounded so many corners I was sure we were in maze. I was starting to get dizzy again but I focused hard on keeping myself conscious. We finally made our way to a staircase, and Emily helped me down it as fast as we could go. We made it into another large room when the door snapped closed behind us. We spun around to see that Effy had magically materialized once again.

"You know there are shorter ways around this house," she told us mockingly, before pulling out a small handgun and pointing it directly at me. I could see the lights from the police cars through the window behind her and I silently prayed that they would make it to us in time.

"I don't normally like to deal with guns," she said, cocking her head sideways slightly, "but you've left me no choice."

"Effy you don't have to do this," I heard Emily say as she trembled beside me.

"No you don't have to do this Emily," she screamed back, surprising me by tearing up slightly, "we're special Emily, and she's standing between us. She has to go!"

"Effy," Emily responded gently, evidently seeing a chance to manipulate her, "just calm down and we can sort this okay?"

"No!" Effy yelled back, getting increasingly more upset and out of control, "don't you fucking… don't fucking try and stop me!"

Then suddenly I heard a bang and I quickly realized a shot had been fired. I saw nothing but red and wondered if this is what everyone felt when they had been shot. I waited for the pain to come, but it didn't, and for a moment I panicked thinking the bullet had killed me instantly. But then I realized that I wasn't seeing blood, I was seeing Emily's hair.

Everything was going in slow motion as I felt her slump back against me and I heard Effy wailing about how she hadn't meant to do it. I looked up at her and saw her eyes narrow in complete hatred, but before she could raise her gun again I had grabbed the small pistol out of Emily waistband and shot the bitch directly in the chest. I watched as her face contorted into a look of surprise and shock. She dropped her gun and stumbled back a few times gasping for breath before she crashed through the large window behind her.

I turned my attention back to Emily who was shaking and sputtering below me. I knelt down and picked her up, gently cradling her head with my hands. She was looking at me with nothing but shock in her eyes, and I looked down to see the bullet had hit her directly in the stomach. I brushed her hair out of her eyes and she coughed a bit. I felt tears springing to my own eyes as the severity of the situation kicked in.

She had taken a bullet for me.

"Emily, look at me," I told her as gently as I could given my panic, "you're going to be okay. Just stay with me."

"Naomi?" she asked as if she were only just aware of my presence.

"I'm here babe," I answered through a sob as tears began to stream down my face.

"I have to tell you something," she said as she coughed and spluttered.

"Shh, save it babe, you can tell me later. Just try and stay awake."

"No I have to tell you now," she protested. She weakly reached up and placed her hand gently on my cheek, and looking me directly in the eyes she whispered, "I love you."

I felt the tears flowing freely as I was openly crying now.

"I love you too," I told her without any hesitation, "I love you so much Emily, and that's why you need to stay with me. I can't fucking lose you Emily, I can't do it. Not when we've only just found each other."

"You love me," she responded dreamily as her eyes began to flutter shut.

"Emily, no! You have to stay awake, do you hear me? Do you fucking hear me Emily Fitch! You cannot fucking do this to me, please…" I begged her, leaning down to give her a gentle kiss on the lips. I leaned back waiting for her to continue, hoping to keep her talking.

"Emily?"

No response.

"Emily fucking answer me right now!" I screamed shaking her vigorously, but it did no good.

Her hand fell away from my cheek.


	25. Can't Go Back Now

_Two Weeks Later_

"And then she died in my arms. It was just… I felt her take her last breath and… and then I just lay there holding her… completely unable to move. I'm not sure how long I was there… I wasn't even aware of anything that was going on around me until I heard Freddie's voice telling me I had to leave. He had to tear me away from her… you know… because even though it wasn't safe for me to stay with her I just didn't want to leave her there. So he picked me up and carried me off… leaving her body there in that awful, awful place. We waited outside and… and I just hoped against all hope that when the police came back outside they would have her with them and she would magically be alright. But… but they told me they couldn't even find her body… figured that cunt Effy had disposed of it before she ran off… you know not wanting another murder on her hands and all that. Then the cops put me in the ambulance and I spent the next night in the hospital and the rest of the week at home healing from the torture I had endured… and grieving over my losses."

As I finished speaking, I heard the click that indicated the tape had stopped rolling. I wiped a few stray tears from my eyes looked up to face the officer who had been taking the recording and gave him a weak smile.

"Is that everything Miss Campbell?" he asked, giving me a sympathetic look.

"Yes I believe so," I responded, nodding slowly.

"We're terribly sorry to have to make you relive all this again, and so soon. Especially considering the extensive amount of psychical and emotional pain you've been put through in the last few weeks," he told me, "but we wanted to get the details while they were still fresh in your mind. And now that you've had some more time to process it, we just wanted to get it all again."

"I understand officer," I said quickly to quell his obvious discomfort at the situation, "I don't mind because as painful as it is to relive it… if it helps put that bastard behind bars for the rest of his life it's worth every moment."

"I assure you Miss Campbell; we're doing everything we can to ensure that, that becomes a reality."

"Thank you, officer," I replied, and I started to get to my feet before he stopped me.

"Miss Campbell," he started, "I was just wondering, you know, if you've been seeing anyone… like a grief counselor or maybe a psychologist. I think considering the immense amount of psychological strain you've been put under… well It could really do you some good."

I nodded my head sadly, thanking him once again before offering my hand in a friendly handshake. He offered me one last look of sympathy before I spun around on my heels and made my way out of his office. I walked through the police department for what I hoped was the final time, nodding to the receptionist as I made my way out. I winced slightly when I opened the door. Although my wounds were healing nicely, every now and then pressure on the areas where I'd been cut still hurt quite a bit.

Making my way to my car, I was finally glad to be out of that wretched place. The moment I hit the driver's seat I let out a sigh of relief that this whole ordeal of dealing with the aftermath was almost over. My wounds were healing nicely and the police had been dealt with… now the only thing that remained was the grieving process. For my part, I had arranged a funeral for Cook that would be taking place tomorrow morning. Panda's funeral had been yesterday. I felt tears spring to my eyes as I thought about the loss I had endured, but I quickly pushed those thoughts away. I wouldn't let myself think about it… I fucking wouldn't.

As I pulled up to my apartment, I thought about how empty it would seem over the next few days. Most of the gang had been staying there the past few weeks, but Katie and Freddie had left this morning on a boat bound for Costa Rica and JJ had decided to go and stay with his family in London for a while. I had gotten really used to having them around, and I couldn't help but think it would feel weird not to have them there now.

I made my way into my apartment, being absolutely certain to lock it behind me this time. One thing I had learned throughout this entire ordeal is that being overly cautious and paranoid is not always a bad thing.

But sometimes letting your guard down could lead to great things.

I set my things down on the couch and made a beeline for the bedroom. When I opened the door I instantly felt better when I was greeted by a smile.

I stepped into the room and helped her sit up as she realized I was home.

"Hey babe," Emily said softly, smiling up at me, "how did everything go at the station?"

"Great," I answered leaning down to drop a kiss on her forehead before moving down to sit on the edge of the bed next to her," I'm just glad it's fucking over."

"And they didn't suspect anything?" she asked, quirking her eyebrow with curiosity.

"Not a thing," I told her, smiling warmly, "which was of course due in large part to my stellar acting abilities."

"Oh fuck off," she replied, laughing, "only because you're such a drama queen!"

"You just wish you were as talented as me, Fitch," I teased, jabbing her knee lightly.

"I'm plenty talented," she argued, pouting and pretending to be offended at my insinuation.

"I know," I admitted, squeezing her knee and causing her to stop pouting and smile widely at me, "how are you feeling today?"

"Ugh, a little better," she answered, her mood almost automatically deflating, "that Karen is a miracle worker… which is kind of hard to believe. But I still think I would have healed faster in a hospital."

"I know babe, but you know this was the safest plan," I told her, still rubbing her knee soothingly, "if Tony gets out you know he's going to come looking for you, he could have his minions that haven't been arrested after you right now if he didn't think you were dead. And we still don't know what happened to Effy…"

"So they never found a body?"

"Nope," I answered, shaking my head and shuddering slightly at the thought. Emily smiled sympathetically at me and placed her hand over mine.

"Don't worry babe, in a few days we'll be long gone and we won't have to worry about her anymore. Besides she's a fugitive now, I think escaping is more important to her at the moment."

I nodded in agreement and pulled her fingers to my mouth, delivering a soft kiss on her knuckles which gave me the satisfactory reaction of a contented sigh from Emily. I wasn't really worried about Effy coming after us right now, but I couldn't help but wish the bitch was dead. She had killed Cook and Panda, she had tortured me, and she had almost killed Emily. Karen had said we had got her there in barely enough time to save her… and perhaps in the short run it would have been safer to send her in ambulance. But faking her death was safer in the long run, as Freddie pointed out, and Emily was strong so luckily Karen had been able to save her. Also, Karen had told us that the bullet had missed all of Emily major organs which was another bought of good fortune. We were almost out of harm's way now, Emily just had to finish healing up enough to fly and we would be out of the country without ever looking back. When Freddie and Katie had left for Costa Rica this morning, Katie had left Emily her passport so that when she flew out to meet them she could pass herself off as Katie. As far as anyone in Britain was concerned now, Emily Fitch was dead.

"Are you okay?" Emily asked, snapping me out of my reverie. I looked up at her and she had a quizzical expression in her eyes. I guess she had sensed my change in mood.

"Yeah… I guess," I answered half heartedly, "it was just hard you know… going in there and reliving all of those horrible things."

"I know babe," she agreed, opening her arms to signal me to move up and join her on the bed. I kicked off my shoes and scooted up towards her, laying my head on her chest and she wrapped her arms around me. I wrapped one of my arms around her back but placed the other on her thigh as to not disturb her still fresh wound. Once I had settled she placed a soft kiss on my temple causing me to let out a soft hum of contentment.

But I still didn't feel content.

"I just don't like to think about it, you know," I started again, "I mean… I was just beaten and tortured and I have to bury my best friend tomorrow… and on top of all that I have to tell them all these things about you dying and… god I just can't stand even pretending that, that was what happened... I.."

"Hey, hey," Emily stopped me as I was starting to get upset, placing her finger underneath my chin and making me look at her, "that's not what happened okay. I'm right here."

I nodded vigorously, trying to keep myself from crying for what was probably the millionth time in the last few weeks. Emily leaned in and placed a sweet kiss on my lips that did its job of making me feel comforted and loved. I brought my hand up to her neck, pulling her towards me, just wanting to taste her a little more. I felt her moan into the kiss, and I knew we had to stop before we had gotten too deep into starting something we couldn't finish just yet. I reluctantly pulled away and opened my eyes to see hers were still closed in what appeared to be a look of pure ecstasy. I grinned and brushed my fingers along her jaw as she finally opened her eyes and shot me a coy smile.

"Did you ever think about how ironic this all is?" I asked suddenly, causing her furrow her brow in confusion at my seemingly random subject change.

"I mean how we met and this whole mess subsequently happened. When I met you I felt like I had been looking for you my whole life, and then all of that happened… and it just feel so fucking ironic."

"I suppose it is a little ironic," she replied with a smile, "I'd been waiting for someone to come along and save me for so long that when you walked into my life I couldn't help but think, you know, 'finally!' And then, for everything to spiral out of control like that…. yeah I guess it's rather ironic on both our ends isn't it?"

I just smiled in return and snuggled into her chest a bit further. After everything that had happened, we still hadn't really discussed much in terms of our future together. We were going to fly to Costa Rica together to meet up with Freddie and Katie, but from there I wasn't really sure what would happen. I knew I wanted to be with her, but things were so much more complicated than that. Technically, since everyone outside of our little group thought Emily was dead, she would be safer without me. If Tony ever got out of prison, or if Effy was still alive and ever found out where we were, she would be in danger if she was with me. After everything that we had been through, I wasn't sure Emily fancied the chance of having another encounter with the Stonem's. I didn't either, but they knew I was alive so I didn't really have a choice if it ever came down to it. Emily could disappear, assume a new identity, and never have to deal with any of this again. In reality, I suppose, I could do the same, and I had seriously thought about changing my last name to make myself less traceable. But when it came down to it, I wasn't sure what was going to happen. And I was completely terrified to ask Emily about it.

"Do you think you'll be able to come with me to Cook's funeral tomorrow… you know under the guise of Katie Fitch that is," I asked, breaking the silence that had fallen over us.

"I think I'm feeling up to it," she whispered into my hair, "and I want to be there for you."

I smiled genuinely and leaned back down into her shoulder, but she quickly stopped me by placing her fingers gently under my chin and raising it up so our eyes locked once again.

"I know things still aren't right between us after everything that happened," she started as she continued to lightly stroke my jaw with her thumb, "but I'll do anything to make all of this up to you… I just want you to know that."

I felt my chest tighten at her words and I placed a sweet kiss on the corner of her mouth before nodding. It was ridculous how crazy things had been between us since we met, but it was even more ridulous how in love with her I was.

And even though we were both broken, bandaged, and scarred; at that moment I wouldn't change a thing.

-x-

It was a cold and rainy on the day I buried my best friend; exactly the kind of day one would expect for such an event. The sky cast a shadow of meloncholy across the cemetary as our figures stood huddled together, shivering as his body was lowered into the ground. As the only two mourners present, we laid flowers by the headstone once the casket had been covered by the thin layer of green felt that would protect it until fresh sod could replace it. I sobbed into Emily's shoulder and she stood for me, strong and fierce, as the pastor spoke in almost nothing but cliches. I was never a religious person, and neither was Cook, but for some reason I wanted him to be laid to rest by a pastor. I thought it was the right thing to do.

It wasn't long before Emily and I were standing alone in the wind and rain, her strong arms wrapped around me as I wept for the loss of my family; for the loss of my life as I once knew it. It must have been hours before I finally stopped crying, and brought my shaking hand to my cheeks to try and wipe away some of the mixture of tears and rain that had formed there. I looked up at Emily, who's face was filled with love and sympathy, and I couldn't help but smile. Even as I stood in this wretched weather, huddled over the headstone of my best friend, something about her made me feel like everything would be okay. She leaned forward to place a soft kiss on my cheek and instantly felt warm where her lips had touched me, and inside my heart.

"Do you think we'll be okay?" I asked, seemingly out of nowhere, but both of us knew it had come from anywhere but that.

She looked at me for a long moment before whispering, "all but death can be adjusted."

"Emily Dickenson?" I asked, stifling a laugh causing her to look at me quizically, "I'm sorry, I just never took you for a poetry fan."

"I guess there's a lot you don't know about me then," she replied without missing a beat and smiling mischeviously.

With that, I brought both of my hands to her cheeks and leaned forward so our lips were barely touching and breathed, "and I can't wait to find out."

She kissed me then, with the kind of passion that most people only dream about experiencing. And as I stood in that cemetary, grieving the loss of my best friend and my former life, I was also celebrating. Celebrating the start of a new life, with a new person for me to love and to love me in return. She pulled away and gave me a look that showed she understood exactly how I was feeling. This was a new beginning for her as well.

The start of something beautiful.

She took my hand in hers then, and led me out of the cemetary, taking the first steps into our new lives. I didn't know what they would hold for us, for me; but I was excited to find out. I didn't know if what we had would last, or if we would be able to work it out after everything that had happened. But I hoped we would. I hoped that I would be able to fall into her arms every night and wake up the same way in the morning. I hoped I could hear her sweet laugh and see her beautiful smile ten years from now and still feel the same butterflies in my stomach that I do at this moment. But only time would tell those things, and right now time was all we had.

We made our way to my car, and as I turned it on the radio immediately kicked in with the familiar sounds of the beginning of one of my favorite songs.

"Oh I love this song!" Emily shouted, surprising me and reaching forward to turn it up a notch. I looked towards her and my mouth formed a smile that I'm sure was incandescent and I let out a small laugh.

"What?" she asked, smiling her adorable confused smile for the second time in the last hour.

"Nothing," I replied, "I love this song too."

She reached across the console as I pulled into traffic and grabbed my free hand. I felt the electricity run between us that I hoped would never fizzle out, as the words began.

_All along the western front, people line up to receive._

_She got the power in her hands, to shock you like you won't believe._

* * *

**To all of you who didn't press the back button after the first sentence; thank you for trusting me.**

**This is the end, and a very emotional moment for me.**

**An authors note/soundtrack including a short epilogue will be posted within the next two days.**


	26. Author's Note  Thank You!

Well this is it my friends. The story of Electric Feel has been told, and now I'm ready to gracefully bow and step away from the work I've done and leave it here for fans of it to enjoy again and again. This story has been like a child for me, and I've poured countless amounts of time and energy into making it what it has become. For the last chapter, I wrote almost all of it a few hours after I posted chapter 24, but I put off finishing it for almost a week just because I could barely stand the thought of it really being over. I've been working on it since March… which is a hell of a long time in my opinion. Truthfully, part of me is happy it's over because it was a very intense and stressful storyline to write. Due to the fact that I had it planned out from the beginning, I was constantly trying to live up to my own expectations. And, due to its relative popularity with all of you kind folks… I was constantly trying to balance that with living up to all of your expectations. But ultimately, I stuck by what I always wanted this story to be. Emily was always going to live, Cook was always going to die, and I was always going to leave you with supremely evil cliff hangers .

The idea for this story came to me at a time in my life when I was doing a lot of reflection. I was into Skins and decided that I would write this story around Naomi and Emily because it just seemed to fit them, and I wasn't sure how far I would have gotten with it if I had used original characters. As I'm sure a few of you could tell, I'm not really a writer. I mean, I write of course, I spend half my life writing. But I wouldn't classify myself as a writer. A songwriter, yes, and that's half the reason I wrote this. I've been told that writing prose can really help develop your song/poetry writing skills, so I figured what better way than to start a fanfiction that I wouldn't have to worry about having any commitment to (little did I know I would end up practically married to it, but I digress). I also wrote it because it helped my paper writing skills a lot to write short stories, and that's a skill I need to continue working on.

Just a few things I would like to say about the story itself. You can read this story and see a mystery, a thriller, a drama, a romance… anything really. But ultimately it was a story about the line between love and trust. It wasn't a character driven story, rather one that showed how characters reacted to, admittedly, a rather unlikely series of events. It was about power, control, desperation and loss… but in the end it was about what all of our stories are about. The love between two people that is so strong that nothing can tear it apart. Even events as monumentous as the ones I created here.

People have made comments about how different the characters I've written are than the ones in the original series, particularly Emily and Effy. But are they really that different? It is my belief that our experiences shape our personalities and who we become. At 17, Emily may have been the shy, mousy girl we know from series 3. My 24 year old Emily went through so many things that made her different from the Emily we all know and love… but at her core she was and is still the same person. My Effy, or how she has so lovingly been dubbed as Evil/Psycho Effy, on the otherhand, is an incarnation of what I think the character could have become. In a very insightful review, Wristducky pointed out that Evil Effy seems to be like one of the demons in Canon Effy's head, and that's exactly how I see it. Also mentioned was how disturbing the image of Effy killing Pandora was, and I'm glad it had that effect because that was what I was going for. In my mind, Pandora's light is a balancing agent to Effy's darkness, which is why they have always worked so well together. But I needed to show that my Effy was so far gone, she was beyond redemption. I also want to quickly comment on the whole, "why didn't Emily use her gun on Effy is she had one," conundrum. I won't say much other than the fact that I originally wrote it with Emily dropping the gun after not getting it out fast enough, but I changed it. Why? Well, that's for you all to mull over (I have to leave some mysteries don't I?)

I'm sure you're all wondering about the epilogue… well I have some bad news. I wrote it, but I have decided not to post it because in the end I really like the way I ended this story with the words to Electric Feel. I'm also sure a lot of people are wondering about a sequel, as I left it wide open for one. Well, the possibility exists, because as far as I'm concered Effy is not dead and Naomi and Emily have much more story left in them. However, whether or not I get around to writing it is another thing entirely. In a perfect world with infinite time, I would love to, but as you all know it took me almost six months to crank out the twenty five chapters in this story, so I just don't know if I have the time. I have started Faithfully and I'm not even sure how far I will get with that. As LuvActually once said to me, writing fanfiction is one of the most time consuming hobbies to have. So, in the end I can't promise any one anything except that I will try my best. The epilogue I wrote will make an appearance eventually, but I can't be sure when.

In the meantime, I've started another story called Faithfully which features Emily as a rich heiress with extremely overprotective parents, and Naomi as a talented musician. The whole gang features in there somewhat, and chapter one has been posted with number two on the way. So check it out, if you're so inclined.

I want to thank every person who has ever reviewed, alerted, favorited, or even read this story. It is all of you that gave me the inspiration to, for the first time ever, finish a piece of fiction. Without all of you, Electric Feel may have remained a stationary one shot… or worse, remained unfinished without anyone ever knowing what happened to our dear Ems and Naoms.

A few specific thank you's are in order.

First off, to LuvActually who partially inspired me to write this with her wonderful stories Coin Laundry and The Retreat.

To HyperFitched, for being awesome, insightful, and inspiring. And for starting and ending I Hold A Force I Can't Contain pretty much right along side of Electric Feel, which is kind of funny to me for some reason. Cheers mate, we're done!

To Circ, who seems to have disappeared, but is nevertheless deserving of a thank you. If you ever have the time, I think a duel between my Evil Effy and your Psycho Katie would be most interesting.

To myotherrideisyourmum, for her fantastic stories, and for starting a new one based on one of my favorite pieces of poetry.

To MonMonroy and my "little mexican fanbase," muchas gracias mi amiga.

To whyyesitscar, for all of the kind words.

To Ruin My Life, my fellow Canadian, and author of the truly remarkable Half asleep.

To my fellow authors esdiferente, Ladyhawk1709, KairiM, niceoneblondie, Blue-Eyed-Blonde90 and AssassinsLover for the their wonderful support and absolutely superb stories.

To all of my readers who reviewed on almost every chapter, I wish I had time to thank you all. You're all wonderful, and I appreciate every word you've ever wrote for me.

And finally, to every writer who is brave enough to post a story on this website about the two characters we all love, thank you and keep on doing what you're doing. You're all fantastic.

Until next time,

Peace, love, Naomily.

-fg

Chapter List- Soundtrack: (for MonMonroy)

Long Division – Death Cab For Cutie

Combat Baby – Metric

Here In Your Arms – Hellogoodbye

Time To Pretend – MGMT

Feel It In My Bones – Tiesto Ft Tegan and Sara

You've Got The Love – Florence + The Machine

Mass Romantic – New Pornographers

Laserbeams – Wintersleep

Back In Your Head – Tegan and Sara

Science Of Fear – Temper Trap

Danse Macabre – Wintersleep

Nice Dream – Radiohead

Love And Truth – Mother Mother

Evil Woman – ELO

Naïve – The Kooks

Passive – A Perfect Circle

Eyes on Fire – Blue Foundation

So Hard Done by – The Tragically Hip

Total Eclipe of The Heart – Bonnie Tyler (Glee version)

Summersong – The Decemberists

Blueprint – The Arkells

Zorbing – Stornoway

Can't Go Back Now – The Weepies


End file.
